Deep reflections; Why do people not change easily?

I’ve been thinking a lot these days. I’ve been pondering on some happenings around me and I just wanted to put my thoughts down and share them with us.

Am sure you’ve heard the saying that change is the only thing that’s constant but have you wondered why people don’t change easily?

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I’ve been grappling with the reality of this statement lately. Somehow I’ve known this saying but it’s beginning to become clearer to me as the days goes by.

A friend of mine told me a story is his friend and the wife. The friend had a girlfriend whom he was dating and then decided to settle down with her in marriage.

While they were dating, the guy had some attitudes that the girl didn’t like. Amongst all the attitudes the one that pisses her off the most is the fact that the guy takes alcohol especially those ones in green bottles and the likes.

She knew she wasn’t comfortable with that part of him and when this my friend asked her if she was going to cope with this part of her soon to be husband, her reply was “Don’t worry when we marry, I will change him”. She was so sure she would change him.

They finally got married and the guy continued with his drinking. Ladies and gentle men, it’s been 14 years down the line and this same husband is still drinking his beer.

The wife has begged, shouted, nagged, thrown tantrums and has done everything seemingly possible in her power to ensure her husband stops drinking because she doesn’t like it but 14 years down the line, he hasn’t changed abit.

The issue is serious because the last time my friend was telling me that he went out with this same friend of his to drink. Mind you, he has stopped going to visit the friend because the wife said he’s among the bad friends that is spoiling her husband.

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She had literally stopped all his friends from coming to their house because she would reign abuses on them for deceiving her husband into not stopping drinking cos his friends drink too. So the friends have no option than to meet up in a bar.

On this faithful day, they were drinking at a bar and the wife came home and found the door locked, she called her husband and he told her where he is. So she had to come to the address to pick up the house key and found her husband drinking again.

The story had it that she started shouting at the husband and his friends publicly in the open bar to stop drinking and she really created a scene, her husband shamelessly ignored her public disgrace and wouldn’t even bulge.

Did you know that that wasn’t the first time she was doing that? The marriage is in a tight corner for a habit that the man wasn’t interested in stopping and she knew but was hoping she would change him.

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My question is why is it difficult for people to change? People know they have problems and others point it out to them, yet they don’t really want to change.

I know criticism is not always easy to handle but personally I love improvement and from my heart I’d tell you that if am doing something bad and I get to know about it, there this thing in me that really want to improve and be better. I sincerely want to be a better part of myself.

I think if we all would have this same mindset, then change wouldn’t be so far fetched but sadly that’s not the reality and it keeps me wondering all the time, why don’t men want to change? Why do people fight change so much? How do you know someone for twenty years and yet there has been no significant positive change in their character and attitudes?

Would you say you have changed for good over time? My brethren, why don’t people change? Please what do you have to say in this my deep reflection cos am still here wondering why don’t people change?