Distribution Curve (Hardfork Series Contest) (Removed)
Flight times blinked once in front of Miko’s eyes as the self-driving town car pulled into the airport drop-off area. Thirty minutes before her international flight. Plenty of time. She stepped out onto the curb into air far more chilly than it had any right to be. Leaves were still clinging to branches. Calendars still proclaimed it summer. Autumn was meant to be weeks away, but at least there were no storms today. Lately it felt like there was a new weather disaster every other week, another flood, a storm, the next island nation lost to the waves.
This story has been removed by the author.
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nice post there...you are followed buddy
This right here, is my favorite part. I had a pretty good idea where it was going once I hit this part and then I was hooked.
Very nice!
Andrew, from the time I read a draft in the queue, 'til now, re-reading this finished, polished release, I've found your story delightful.
Seeing this Type-A corporate woman with a technology fixation thoroughly schooled and gentled down by rural Cambodia was a real delight. Even more so because her experience in the real world gave her a new appreciation and level of compassion for Julie.
I also love the nod to Amazon with your FireHUD device...
Thanks for a very enjoyable read!
😄😇😄
Thanks @creatr! What a thoughtful comment! I super appreciate it. Glad someone spotted the Amazon nod. ;-)
This was a delight. I love the underlying themes. Technology will be powerful and all knowing -- until it isn't. And people will need to 'unplug' from time to time, even if they don't want to.
We're already seeing camps for adults, a sort of internet rehab where people can unplug. My hope is that it will be entire islands or countries where cell phones, tablets, laptops are banned for non-emergency use. A place where people could relax or actually get some shit done.
Anyways, this was excellent. I loved the characters -- Miko, Julie, the nasty cab driver -- and the imagery. The way the banana trees invaded the jungle canopy like spiders. Fantastic, love the picture you painted.
Now to go listen to Holiday in Cambodia on repeat in hopes of getting it unstuck from my head.
you are a prodigy...l am glad to follow you and never want to miss any post.keep doing more @thinknzombie
Andrew, working with you is always an honor. You're a talented writer, you listen seriously to editorial suggestions, and you do wonders with the small hints of ideas I feed you. This story is awesome. I still can't believe it let you post it in one piece!
Besides, you're going to walk me through the rest on my Rhino Comp entry in the week ahead, so we'll all be even. ;-)
Definitely! Count me in. I love reading your stuff.
Wow, Zombie, where were you hiding this?
What a beautiful, introspective piece. I love it!
Under my kilt! (okay, no kilt.) I wrote it special for this contest. It was up the queue, but you and I don't tend to overlap much due to timezones I think). Anyway, thank you for the kind words. As you know, that helps keep us going. ;-)
Now this is starting to get serious...how am I supposed to get anything done if I can't tear myself away from another one of you fantastic short stories. Just stop it will you lol!
The final version is even more wonderful. I love the way it unfolds, and the protagonist's transformation. This line is so terrific:
The little girl was doing the same, as if they were both poorly trained spies engaged in embarrassingly bad surveillance of each other.
I love how the little girl helps her to evolve!
Thanks @jayna! I really appreciate all your help with this too. The little girl was the brainchild (literally) of a far more talented writer than me, @authorofthings, who rightly pointed out that Miko needed more of a catalyst to change. The credit should go to @authorofthings. All errors and mistakes are mine.
This is such a realistic and uplifting story. It feels like the full arc of a movie. Great, professional work, and an enjoyable read.
Thanks @negativer. I don't think this is my best work, but it may have been the most difficult. I really didn't want to finish this story and if it hadn't been for all of you at The Block, I probably would have abandoned it. Glad I didn't in the end. Thanks for reading as always!