RE: Haiku, image - Mizu no Oto Contest week #7
I had to translate it again in order to get the atmosphere.
Herbst, kriechende Dämmerung -
durch den Kaminsims der nackten Halle.
das Trauerlied des Windes
Haiku is like painting with little but determined strokes. Let go of ill determination but a strong and at the same time relaxed will to unfold the whole picture with as little material as possible.
What an art! It takes so much patience and contemplation to get it. I still do not dare to try.
As I am a little biased by the picture and other haikus I already read, still I will give you my emotions:
Sadness about formerly glorious times - strong opposites of images like dancing couples on a wooden shimmering floor. The warmth of the fire place, the crackling sounds of wood ... fine clothes worn by elegant people in velvet and silk ---- all the luxury: gone. Where music was formerly playing, now the wind is singing.
Oh wonderful! That's how haiku poetry is supposed to work.. It requires the interaction of the reader who resonates with the verses. That's the reason why ego, judgment and subjectivity has to be reduced or totally eliminated.
I'd say it's zen. Those strokes are part of the world of intuition, where for an ephemeral moment we forget of ourselves.
Thanks, we created together haiku poetry, writer and reader.
P.s.= I changed it.
Ah, yes - thank you for reminding me on that. Not only the haiku creator but the reader as well has to surrender and put the ego into it's place.
But the Zen turtle says: you shouldn't have changed the verses. They already created a sphere, a resonance and now you rob it off and all words and comments become meaningless ...
ts ts ts
You're right but I'm way far from the enlightment haha
So? Is that an excuse? ;-)
Isn't the same concept of enlightment a construct that pushes us away from it?
However, I want to see you writing a haiku now!
☝
smotch botch
needlework passion
passed by
grabbing shiny plastic
Troll in the forest -
Someone's else post is ideal
for mocking.
😂😂😉
This is a senryu.
What a vivid picture you have just painted with words.
Gave my best and well willed painting strokes to it! ;-)Thanks for lookin.