About Going Grey ...

in #goinggrey6 years ago (edited)

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So what’s the big deal? By whose authority was ‘old’ made a taboo 😱 and having ‘old hair’ a sin 🙅🏼‍♀️? Something so despicable 😤 and disgusting 🤢, to be frowned upon 😠and reviled 🤬?

2016, a week or so shy of my 58th birthday would be the last time I coloured my hair. I had met up with my BFF some months earlier and was blown away at how stunning she looked with her head in all its glorious cottony white! Fed up with my monthly ritual at the hairdresser’s I was inspired to do the same 😎.

I didn’t know what I was in for when I decided on this journey. People didn’t take me seriously when I told them I was going grey. Friends were strongly opposed to my going au naturel 👎🏼. ‘Too young’ they’d say, ‘mustn’t let yourself go’ they’d say, ‘only if u kept it short and spiky’ they’d say, yadayadayada ....… 🙄 The acquaintances were a little nicer 😅. They’d give an encouraging, ‘oh so brave’, a polite ‘you don’t look too bad’ or an unconvincing but very kind ‘no-lah*, you don’t look old’. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I struggled a lot 😰. Not just because of what others said or thought but internally, I myself would agonise seeing this old person looking back at me in the mirror😫. And I didn’t want my amazing kids to be embarassed to be seen with me 🙈. You see, my end result wasn’t the cottony white as I had dreamed but an eeky salt and pepper. There were days I hated it so much I could cry 😭.

But I wasn’t about to back down and run to the nearest hair salon to undo this madness. I’m very prideful more than I am, vain. If I said I will do, I will do it 💪🏼. I’m not letting anyone have the satisfaction of saying ‘I knew she wouldn’t last!’. 😠 But more importantly, It was about taking a stand. A stand against some ridiculous standard that determines how women should look past a certain age. That says you may be 50, 60, 70 but you shouldn’t look it 😳. Well, I’m declaring that I’m 60 and I’m doing it my way 👍🏼.

When I looked back at pictures of ‘younger me’ in my fake black, brunette, blonde and all in-between shades I thought how ridiculous I looked 🤪. But at the same time, I wasn’t liking the ‘old me’ either ☹️. Stuck in a limbo I was …. can’t go back and a real suffering moving forward 😢.

So I joined a Facebook support group for women transitioning to grey and was appalled 😱 to discover the scorn and bullying most of these women had and continue to endure 😔 because they chose not to dye their hair. Unbelieveable 😡! Mothers, husbands, siblings, best friends, hairdressers and even strangers were biting and cruel in their comments, as if some crime had been committed. Sad ….😢

It was a long and difficult journey but I eventually made it 😅. I am quite comfortable being granny me 👵🏻. I mean I’ll be 60 soon, I am already considered a senior citizen in most countries and I’m as grandma as I’ll ever be (to find out what I mean, do read my intro post 😊). So is looking young still important to me? Let’s be real, it wouldn’t hurt and there are still days when I don’t like how I look but it’s not that big a deal anymore 🤷🏼‍♀️. There are bigger issues in this world to worry about than my white strands showing.

To those who are considering going grey, naturally, that is … I would tell you to put on a thick skin 🤘🏼, get a good hairdo 💆🏼‍♀️, put on bright lipstick 💄 and pretend you’re Helen Mirren 😉! It really is quite liberating at the end of the road. Or come talk to me.

To all the haters, c’mon, give us grey / salt & pepper / silver sisters a break 🙏🏼…. Be nice 😇 or be gone 💨. You really don’t need to be so worked up over hair.

To the rest of the world, next time you see someone with grey hair, don’t recoil. Make her day. Give her smile 😁, say hi 👋🏼, tell her you like the colour of her hair 👵🏻 and that she looks nice 😍.
Note: that last one is meant for women only otherwise you may get clobbered 👊🏼 for being a pervert 😜!

Thanks for reading 😊. Signing out ….✌🏼

Note to self : must learn to inset multiple images 🤔

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Wow! I never knew the struggle. Very proud of you! Those nasties have no idea the pressure that they're putting on others AND themselves!

I for one think you look very much like a classy almost 60 year old! Amazing.

Hahaha ..... Thanks son!

Wow, society can really take bullying to a whole new level when they chose to!
Thought Sandwich is a joined blog, but I want to say that right now a 24-year-old girl is typing this.
Why is it a crime to have grey hair and why is it unacceptable to be human and simply age?
We all age and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!
Besides, my aunt was grey at 18, my mom and me at 20. All fit for a retirement home right?
Beauty standards really are getting out of hand and that's coming from a person obsessed with makeup haha
Honestly, every single wrinkle, grey hair, smile and frown line or stretch mark, is nothing but a beautiful record of a life lived.
I respect you immensly for doing this and thank you for helping to inspire others :)

@thought.sandwich, your reply made me smile. Thanks much. Yeah, I was not expecting the kind of reaction I got and that made me want to do it all the more. I'm a pretty vain pot myself so it was a real challenge. Now I'm just an 'old-looking' vain pot! Lol!
Btw, you're real awesome. Big smile right back at you!

As you know I’m a supporter of all things natural. Didn’t budge when people bugged me to colour my hair! You made a great decision and you’re looking great too!

You are bias but I appreciate it! Thanks! :)

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