This Just In: Credible Sources Tell Us @NoNamesLeftToUse has Entered a Contest
Good Morning, Good Afternoon, or Good Evening
To you sir, ma'am, it, these, those and them over there.
My name is Tommy Tater and I'm reporting live here at the luxurious estates located at or around the corner of Trender Avenue and Ned Street.
Today we have something very special to share with you folks at home and that's why your favorite show was interrupted at the most inconvenient time.
Earlier an anonymous tipster calling himself The Informant dropped us a line and said three things:
- @NoNamesLeftToUse The Writer/Artist Himself.
- Art contest.
- The bird flies at noon.
It's Noon Now
And I think I see him!
Yes! That's him! Pan the camera over there by the dumpster, Cam. Show the people at home what a true spectacle looks like! Mr. Himself has not been seen in public for nearly twelve years and today he's stepping out from his mysterious lair to actually speak to us! I promised myself I wouldn't cry but there is a time and place for tears of joy and that is here and now.
As he approaches, I'd just like you folks at home to know that I know my role. I will not, under any circumstances, interrupt this man or make any sudden movements. This is his moment. Let's have a listen to what he has to say.
Hey. What's Up? It's just you two? Where's everyone else?
Everyone else, sir?
Yeah, everyone else. I was expecting more than Tommy freakin' Tater and his trusty sidekick Cameraman Cam from local public access television. Aren't you supposed to be at a farmer's market somewhere reporting on the size of those pumpkins? What's going on here? Where's ABC and NBC and CBC and the BBC? Where's Alex freakin' Jones, man? I showered—for this? I'm entering a contest here you know. Nearly two years ago the world would stop spinning for an event like this. Has the world really changed this much in twelve years? Why is that car not flying?
Sir, I...
Shh.
You see this picture of a frog or toad or whatever it is?
Apparently @kadoka took that picture and then entered it into round one of @papa-pepper's contest. @kadoka won.
Have you heard of this man known as @papa-pepper?
Of course! I mean, who hasn't?
Exactly.
The Mission: PAPA-PEPPER'S WILD & STRANGE CONTEST SEASON 17 - ROUND 2 - ART
So now it's round two. Enter @NoNamesLeftToUse The Writer/Artist Himself. Ding-ding.
The Papa Pepper wants wild and strange. "Take the winning photo and alter it," he said, so I did just that.
Behold!
Wow! That's...
Remarkable!
What is it though?
That's my ticket to the moon, baby.
The moon?
Yes, the moon. Haven't you heard the news? Elon Musk knows a billionaire. The billionaire wants artists to go to the moon with him. I'm an artist. I'm going to the moon!
I figured I'd kill two birds with one stone even though no birds were harmed in the making of this extravaganza because @papa-pepper would have wanted it that way. So now I'm in the running to win some STEEM, which is going to the moon, and then I'm going to the moon!
The press conference is over, no further questions, thanks for coming. Ciao!
Well folks tuning it at home, there we have it. The moon! Can you believe it! The legendary @NoNamesLeftToUse, making history, one day at time. Incredible.
This has been Tommy Tater reporting live. Stay good out there, friends. Live long and proper. Goodnight.
Is the mic off, Cam? Good. You know, I hope they leave him there. Ha ha ha ha ha! Let's go grab a coffee...
Is that Mr. Himself pictured meditating at the toad's throat chakra? There also appears to be a tiger's face just above his crotch, which would seem kind of suggestive if amphibians didn't fertilize eggs outside of the female's body. Still, I guess when you've got toad legs you've got to overcompensate in some way.
Your writing was ridiculously entertaining, by the way. Mr. Himself - I like that guy.
Very funny there!! I do have a question to ask, in those days, frugs are known to be long and teening legs. But nowadays frugs are growing up fater than the once in those days. So I nan go to my question that says, does Toads and Frugs Gym in time now?
That tiger face is an old tattoo. Yup. And at least you didn't call them chicken legs. He doesn't like that. Sensitive.
He ought to be more sensitive about the bearded human on his throat. I'm sure the toad ladies like his legs anyway.
"Credible Sources Tell Us "
That's bullshit and you know it. There are no credible sources left. I should know. I'm not even a credible source myself.
And, furthermore,
"I figured I'd kill two birds with one stone"
Any bird that can be killed with just one stone is a total pussy. I've never met a stone that could kill me, and believe me, I've been stoned by some of the more incredible stones around in my day. Friggin featherweights these birds you are hanging out with NoName!
It might be bullshit but bullshit is some of the best fertilizer known to humanity and all one needs is a thin layer of the stuff and ideas will start popping up everywhere.
And you know, I tried to make new friends! I really did but every time I just keep going back to these stoned birds because I know they'll have my back even after I throw stones so there's no need to make fun of them. Focus on the red gitch and try not to worry about these things.
If I don't worry about these things, who will? You? Don't make me laugh.
Last "accident" I had was with a stick.. and that was a Woodcock. Poor bird...
You have a future in designing frog fashion if this whole moon thing doesn't pan out.
These are exciting times!
This is impressive both in the act of catching a frog and into talking it into not pooping all over the floor. What is next flamingos wearing thongs? What a universe we live in.
Thongs with flamingos on them. That's what's next.
OMG put some clothes on!
Don't forget to take some oxygen with you when your steem takes you to the moon.
I've been practicing holding my breathe. Don't you worry, I got this.
Froggy hot pants... awesome!
Forgive me but I think they're wrong... they would look much more fashionable in pink with little flamingos on!
He keeps those in the special drawer, for special occasions.
ahahahah: D
This replacement is great. Frankly I laughed at this! :D
Perfect response! Laughter is always good.
Guffaw worthy image.
What's under the red is probably funnier but I had to keep this kid friendly.
Good luck winning the contest so you can go to the moon :D I'm now wondering what kind of stuff you could produce in zeroG XD
I'm sure experiencing weightlessness will lead to many out of this world creations.