Learn Some International Sign Language with Eveuncovered!
This ain't no Sunday School baby, we are going full on street smarts over at this course.
I'm going to be teaching you something very important that will help you to be a more decent human being, and might even end up saving your life one day.
Did that spike your interest?
Here we have a human subject who we are going to use as an example. What do you think she is trying to tell with her clothing, expression and posture? There are some very subtle hints that only a trained eye will notice, like yours, after this course.
For those of us who are highly trained in psychology and human behavioral science, it's very clear that she is telling you to STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! Do not approach, talk to her or for fuck sake touch her, you might end up losing a limb. Apparently, that is not so clear to the common citizen, so I'm here to teach you how to spot the red flashing signs.
Headphones in her ears means that she is listening to music and probably doesn't want you to interrupt the good beats with your whiny voice.
Her shirt says NOT TODAY. Other similar shirts might say for example "misanthropy" or "antisocial". Pretty self-explanatory, right?
Mirrored lenses making sure no-one can make eye contact.
Resting Bitch Face, if that doesn't turn in to a smile as soon as she sees you, do_not_approach.
Only glancing up from her phone in order not to walk into a pole, or you, both as attractive to her.
- Advanced indicator: she is young, white and female (so bitchyness is in her genetics).
I don't want you to be discouraged by this, all these markings don't mean that you can never ever approach a person like that. If she, for example would take both her earphones off, flash a big smile and even take her sunnies off, you are good to go! Those are usually clear indicators that she is safe to speak to, and possibly even hug!
Hope this helps you to navigate the stormy seas of life much smoother and safer. But as always, do your own research, and I will not take any responsibility for your misjudged actions.
Many people have told me over the years that I'd be a good teacher, so why not try it out here on Steemit, seems to work for some people.
If you feel like you didn't quite get what I was saying, I'll be available for some after school special education per request, and of course Steem is the preferred payment method.
Disclaimer: if you are not fluent in English and/or don't have the ability to understand humor, sarcasm or parody, and you are easily offended by anything and everything, this post was not for you. Go away.
Your Bad Teacher, Eve
Clearly it means that you must smudge both lenses with your thumbs, pulling out the earphones in a single motion.
"Not Today" just means a promise for tomorrow, so why not strike when its least expected? Thats right, a full on french kiss with a double ass grab for good measure.
Grab one of the swinging headphones and release your startled prey, jamming it deep in your greasy ear canal. She'll love those gobs of orange earwax. Divine!
(Yes, I'm joking.)
You rascal! Do not give my students these horrible ideas!
Phew... good thing I got a chance to read this very educational post! I would have interpreted it completely wrong:
First of all, I thought the kid was wearing a hearing aid.. the facial expression to me seemed like one of frustration, because she can't see anything on her tiny TV, even with her glasses on and I figured the message on the shirt was more metaphoric, like.. no TV today.. or "no milk today didudidudidu".. something like that.. 🤓
Thank god, with your lesson I get a much better understanding now. Thanks a lot!!
(yes, just kidding :-) )
That's life - plain as fucking day for those unwilling to notice... Glad you brought out the ABC's of basic awareness to the broad spectrum of your ardent followers... he-he... OH, and BTW - I finally figured out who you remind me of...
Kate from LOST... remember that classic TV series from the 90's? Except, of course, you are far more beautiful than she... ;-)
I don't mind the comparison at all, she is beautiful! And of course I remember Lost, but did it really come out in the 90's?
No, it didn't - I was wrong... It ran from 2004 - 2010... :-)
This one was actually quite funny! It occurred to me that photoshopping cut marks onto the arms would have greatly magnified the effect.
I disagree. I don't actually understand what self inflicted injury would have to do with any of this.
The character you have created is obviously a parody of an angry and depressed teenager. Self-harm is an extreme part of the same behavioral spectrum. Cut marks are usually covered, though. That character is definitely not cool or in control. Her behavior is indicative of being in a sensitive and fragile developmental stage.
I guess a hall pass would be out of the question?
Well, it depends, do you have a valid reason?
Congratulations! This post has been upvoted from the communal account, @minnowsupport, by jeffjagoe from the Minnow Support Project. It's a witness project run by aggroed, ausbitbank, teamsteem, theprophet0, someguy123, neoxian, followbtcnews/crimsonclad, and netuoso. The goal is to help Steemit grow by supporting Minnows and creating a social network. Please find us in the Peace, Abundance, and Liberty Network (PALnet) Discord Channel. It's a completely public and open space to all members of the Steemit community who voluntarily choose to be there.
I'll take a detention.
Thanks.
What is your transgression? I need to know so I can punish you accordingly.
I'll take all the punishments.
Thanks.
See you in two weeks ;)
haha @eveuncovered, I think I will try approaching a woman like that soon. Just give it a try, I guess...
Be careful ;)
Headphones in her ears means she is pretending to listen to music while secretly listening to the men around her talk about how hot she is. This makes her a little uncomfortable, yet somehow reassured that she is indeed, hot ... as she suspected all along.
Her shirt says NOT TODAY. Other similar shirts might say for exmaple "I hate NBC" or "Fuck Al Roker!". Pretty self-explanatory, amirite?
Mirrored lenses making sure no-one can tell she's checking out your bulge.
Resting Bitch Face, if that doesn't turn into a smile as soon as she sees you, do_not_approach.
Only glancing up from her phone in order not to walk into a pole ... and drop your sandwich.
Shit ... I think I did it wrong.
Shhhhh, don’t give away my secrets!
lol This is great!