The Four Corners, a Chibera story -5minutefreewrite Comedy Open Mic Round 32

in #freewrite6 years ago

This is three things
Firstly, a freewrite (find the prompt here: https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day339-5-minute-freewrite-sunday-prompt-the-four-corners)

Secondly, because I think I wrote it with humor, it's an entry in @comedyopenmic's round 32 and therefore I nominate @ecoinstant and @chibera to write their own humorous Chibera stories for that contest!

And thirdly, it is a story set in the Chibera world, which you can do, too for https://steemit.com/chibera/@chibera/chibera-tell-us-about-characters-story-usd200-in-rewards

The story so far
Prologue, The World Tree:
https://steemit.com/chibera/@improv/chibera-the-world-tree-s-call
Chapter 1, Inkpot:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@improv/door-5minutefreewrite
Chapter 2, Shabron:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@improv/kit-5minutefreewrite-wcnh32z4
Chapter 3, Holly:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@improv/visit-5minutefreewrite
Chapter 4, Shalgarth:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@improv/dragon-breath-5minutefreewrite
Chapter 5, Pumpkin:
https://steemit.com/chibera/@improv/pumpkin-a-chibera-story
Chapter 6, Shabron:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@improv/death-on-the-table-a-chibera-story-5minutefreewrite-500-words-really
Chapter 7, Cadlen:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@improv/washcloths-a-chibera-story-5minutefreewrite-but-really-longer-than-that

And now!


Shalgarth, astride his mighty Lippashaner, did his best not to literally look down on Pumpkin. She was nearly 5 feet lower than him, due to both the Shadland's and her own smallness. He wasn't, perhaps, the most charismatic man, but he was conscientious, he thought. She's very short, he kept thinking, mustn't let her think I noticed.

"You know," Shalgarth said aloud, and very loudly, "I've been to all four corners of this great wide world, and, well, you're really very large." Shalgarth smiled to himself, a broad, toothy grin.

Pumpkin stared up at the great behemoth of a man on the largest horse she'd ever seen telling a dwarf on a pony that she was large.

He went on, "You know, ants are very small. Squirrels aren't quite as small, but they're smaller than you. Of course, trees are large, but you know that."

Pumpkin closed her eyes, sighed deeply, and shook her head. Shalgarth, glancing over, caught a glimpse of the motion.

"Yes, they are. Those ones in the distance are very far away, not small." He paused. "But, I suppose baby trees and those special trees that people cut to make into inside trees are small. Smaller than you, even. Which, of course most things are, because you're very large."

"Shalgarth," Pumpkin said quietly.

"Really, there are a lot of shapes and sizes to things in the world."

"Shalgarth." Pumpkin said more insistently.

He looked down at her.

"We're here." Pumpkin's voice cracked.

Shalgarth looked around. They were certainly on a hill, but there were no sheep, and not really any signs of a town except, perhaps, a few overgrown bumps on the ground that might once have been mud huts.

"Are you sure?" asked Shalgarth.

Pumpkin, having dismounted, knelt by a hillock overgrown with snagbriars. "This was his home, and that one was mine. I don't know what happened. Did everyone just leave?" Pumpkin looked up. Shalgarth had strung his bow and was aiming an arrow at a golden hart munching on snagbriar berries several yards away. She opened her mouth to scream, but nothing had a chance to come out before Shalgarth had loosed his string and the arrow flew true, piercing the golden hart in its heart and felling it within instants. Pumpkin stood stock still, shock still rooting her to the ground.

"We'll eat well tonight!" Shalgarth bellowed as he strode across the short distance between himself and the motionless golden hide running red with rivulets of blood. Before he made it half the distance he stumbled. All the heavy armor he wore clanked as he caught his balance and stayed on his feet. He looked back at the snagbriars, as if baffled that any mere root would dare to impede the great Shalgarth's mighty progress. He only looked baffled a moment, though, as he saw the entire field of snagbriars writhing, vines reaching towards him, roots grasping his great heavy boots and rooting him to the spot. He slashed with his great sword at the nearest, and he called, "Pumpkin! Mount and run! We're being attacked!"

Looking up, he saw that his words were unnecessary, as Pumpkin and the Shadland were already a hilltop away, galloping without looking back.

Shalgarth's right boot was the first to become inextricably tangled by the snagbriars. After much hacking and slashing, the briars toppled Shalgarth entirely. The vines tore his helm from his head, baring his face and tightly pressing it to the ground. He heard a loud crunch before he felt the pain of his greaves being crushed and their jagged edges piercing his calves. Several minutes of agony passed as the greaves were pushed closer and closer to the bone, cutting through sinew and muscle and tendon. He thought he could feel each particular bit of flesh destroyed individually. When finally the snagbriars moved no more, his wound had entirely been stopped by the crush of leaves and he had only enough slack to breath. Here he would die, he was sure. And so... he slept.

All photo credits my own.
IMG_20180811_100842.jpg


Shalgarth awoke and thought himself blind. He heard and felt the snuffing of warm breath and the crunch crunch of jaws grinding. Surely I am being eaten alive by wild beasts. Perhaps the scavenging dire coyotes of Manish Plains are also native to this Sheep's Hill. At least the very large dwarf woman is free. I saved her. I am an adventuring hero, and all heroes must die heroic deaths protecting others. Oddly, he thought, there was no pain. I am blessed by The World Tree. She has taken away my pain in these final moments. Perhaps I will be blessed to join her. My flesh shall grow to be a tree as well, and so my spirit will restore mana to the world. Shalgarth didn't have any particular religion of his own, but he made things up and believed them when he thought of them.

The munching continued. For hours, it seemed. In fact, it not only seemed like hours, Shalgarth realized, it was hours. He was not blind, he found, as he saw light before long, green through the leaves that covered him. He also realized at this point that The World Tree had not blessed him with painlessness, for not only did his leg throb, but his stomach began to grumble and pain him.

He saw the teeth of whatever was eating him. They were not the sharp canines of a dire coyote. The broad flat teeth tore a vine and leaf from an inch before his bare face.

horsenose.jpg
It munched for a moment, and then took another bite. When it lifted its head again, a soft, youngish face replaced it. "Hold still, you tiny buffoon. The snagbriars don't mind being eaten by our noble steeds, so just lie still, and we'll have you free in a bit."

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Hi improv,

Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)

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Thank you to @matytan for the great banner

Good story

Although my eyes is envious looking at the payout and I'm wondering if that'll still happen post HF20

@Curie is the source of the big vote. They'll happen in this new age. I'm sure once the dust settles things will be mostly back to normal. But yeah, getting a curie vote was a big ol' feather in my cap. ;)

"You know," Shalgarth said aloud, and very loudly, "I've been to all four corners of this great wide world, and, well, you're really very large."
He went on, "You know, ants are very small. Squirrels aren't quite as small, but they're smaller than you. Of course, trees are large, but you know that."

That got me. That was a pathetic effort to make her feel better. As if being next to a giant was not enough reminder. Lol.
I love the way you weaved your story. It seemed i was under a spell and i read it on to the end without a pause. Poor guy, such severe punishment all because of his quest for the evening meal. You should have had a little mercy on him but then the story won't have been the same.
Good job @improv and congrats on the curie upvote too.

Thanks! Oh, he'll survive, but he'll hopefully learn to be a little more careful in the future! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Thanks for sharing your story! I liked the last image when the snagbriar was being eaten by the steed. I hope you win...

I'm so excited for you!! Congratulations!

Thanks!!!

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Dang man, look at you moving up in the world, now, if you hit the comedy win and the free write. You know those Gods that Shalgarth doesn't know which to believe in are smiling at you. That would be a heck of a payout for a post....

And the Chibera win! That's what I'm reeeeeally hoping for.

I had to go look up the contest.
I just don't know enough about the @chibera world just yet, to really get into a storyline. You and @ecoinstant really seem to be into it, so I sure it has got to be a good bit of fun.
Dude that would be awesome, 30 from curie, 40 from chibera then whatever the open mic is... Now you just need another whale vote or two.

Right? But the trick about chibera is, they haven't really released any information on it, except for what it says in the contest posting. We're just writing what we, perhaps, want to be true. So go ahead and write!

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Well that explains why I'm flip'n confused. I've read 4 or 5 peoples stories and posts on it and there was a bunch of stuff that just didn't line up so I was thinking there was at least a world outline/map/general story somewhere that I was missing...
Well, I have an idea but not sure I can get to it before the 27th. I'm trying to close out a few jobs and just get to this stuff in spurts when I need a couple minutes. (dang I'm full of excuses, I guess you make time for what you really want to do....) I guess I just guilted myself into it....

Well yay then!

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Yeah, I've read all the stories, too, and people put all kinds of flavor on them. I like this idea of the world tree as a famous bit of a mystery to the world's inhabitants, especially since it's such a central figure, but lots of other folks seem to be treating it as a mundane, if magical local phenomenon. Or perhaps they are exploring Chibera as visitors from our world.

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Alright! I will do my best to get a humorous entry in! I enjoy being challenged for things!

Yayyyy!

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Hi improv,

This post has been upvoted by the Curie community curation project and associated vote trail as exceptional content (human curated and reviewed). Have a great day :)

Visit curiesteem.com or join the Curie Discord community to learn more.

Pleased as punch!

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The Chibera world could maybe use this too?

The next prompt

https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-340-5-minute-freewrite-monday-prompt-small-package

Also, do visit
FREEWRITE HOUSE!
for some goodies

Freewritehouse-footer-500px.png
Click the graphic to join in the fun!

Congratulations on the @curie vote :)

I hope so! I haven't settled in for today's write yet.

Posted using Partiko Android

The final sentence and the picture made me laugh. By reading this, it a good way to start my day (with a laugh). You know how to catch the attention of readers with your characters and story. Hope you win this. All the best.

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