RE: Valley of Ash--Finish the Story #30
You made a fairy tale. I felt a bit put in your place and saw some important information while searching for a part of the beginning of the story: Where does the Yog-Sothoth actually come from?
So the fire is not extinguished, but appears in the form of the stone god who destroys everything to ashes that wants the Highlands evil and is connected to the orcs as their land. I actually think that's a very beautiful thought, that there's a kind of divine instance that stands aside from the earthbound. If only it weren't so cruel. But now, that's the stuff of legends, the elements must be strong and invincible.
Shog dared not leave the valley until he understood the intention of the spirit. Always he held in mind his family, hidden in the Highlands behind. He signaled to the Galak warriors that they would neither retreat nor advance but pass the night among the ashen remains of their fallen enemy.
What I like about your Shog is that he proceeds cautiously and how an explorer overcomes his fear and tries to understand the situation and what has happened. Spending the night on the battlefield is also a kind of wake that even the enemy deserves.
To tell the tale of oral tradition is a very old custom over thousands of years and the fact that you appreciate it here seems to me like a tribute to this beautiful quality of people.
You're right--it is cruel. I had to assume a posture that is not natural to me. This was a challenge I probably would not have taken on if you hadn't set an example. But I figured, go forward. It's fiction. Participate for the sake of the group. And so I wrote in a voice that is not intrinsically mine. My husband said it worked out OK, so I put it up. He's my ultimate test, because he does not enjoy obscurity. At least I know the story makes sense when he approves.
Thanks for seeing some value in the piece. Giving it a mythic, folkloric quality was the only way to go for me :)
I was chased by the same thought when I thought about taking on an attitude which does not so much fit me. Taking on the challenge does give the chance to jump over ones own shadow but I admit it's not easy.
How good, that your husband is your ultimate test person. Like that a lot :) I never get my man to read my fiction. lol
We people still long for strong tales and that's what you provided me with.
Many years of marriage--more than I will admit here:)
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