Nicholas Nettle's Curious Trip to Nowhere - Chapters 1-5 - ~11,000 Words of Original Fiction - I Would Really Appreciate Some Feedback
So, I'm pretty new here and don't have many followers. Once I signed up, I decided to jump right in and start posting a lot of my original writing, photography and art.
I've posted each of these chapters individually, but have gotten almost no response at all so far, so I decided to post links to all five chapters together in one post with the hope that maybe a few out there would be willing to take the time to read them
If there's anyone out there who somehow has the ability to help more people see this, I'd really appreciate it. This is only the first few chapters of a full length novel I'm working on. I'd love to keep posting new chapters here as I write them in order for the community to read and give me feedback, but I don't see much point in continuing to post them if no one is even seeing them.
I really don't mean for this to come across as complaining, I'm just sincerely asking for a little help in getting a bit more visibility for my work if there's anyone out there who likes my writing and can help me get it in front of more people in some way.
Anyway, not sure if anyone is going to see this post either, but if anyone does and would like me to continue posting this story as it's written, please let me know. Thank you!
Hey, the story flows nicely and is a pleasure to read. A few points:
The ‘Nicholas was running as fast...’ paragraph needs some serious editing.
Nicholas shrugged his shoulders (redundant) and nodded his head (redundant) in agreement. -> may become ‘Nicholas shrugged, then nodded in agreement.’
I’d do away with italicizing the character’s thoughts.
“Yep, mom finally let me get them pierced last night. Pretty cool huh?” she said proudly. <- eliminate the adverb and use body language instead to convey her pride.
All the best with the story!
Thank you for taking the time to read it and for the constructive criticism. I really do appreciate it. Have a great a weekend!
Cheers, mate.
Just read the first chapter, it really grabbed me and pulled me in. Seems like this could be one of those " children's" books adults enjoy, like Harry Potter. Resteemed and I can not wait to read me.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read it! That's definitely what I'm going for. I actually have an entire trilogy mapped out and the characters will age a bit as the story unfolds across the three books. :)
Have you talked to any publishers about this? This is really great writing.
No, I only have 6 chapters written so far, although I have the entire story outlined and planned out. Actually, I have an entire trilogy of books mapped out.
I started working on it a few years ago, but due to a lot of things not going too well in my personal life, I put it on the shelf for a bit. I've just recently started working on it again.
To be honest, I think I'd rather self publish when finished because I want to maintain complete control of my work. I was hoping that maybe I could find an audience here on Steemit who could help me with some constructive criticism as I continue the story, as well as maybe helping me come up with the funds to self publish the final product properly.
Anyway, didn't mean to write an essay there, haha. Thank you for taking the time to read some of it and for the compliment. I really do appreciate it. :)
I read the first chapter. To be honest, it's not my thing, but! you are a good writer and I think you will absolutely have an audience for it. My best advice would be to build up a few more followers before you share more. You can only earn on posts for seven days so maybe save some for when you have more connections. I mention the earnings because you're putting out your own original hard work and you deserve to benefit! I would upvote you, but I am out of steem. I wish you the best of luck!
Thank you so much for the feedback! Yes, I think I agree with you on waiting a bit before sharing more on here. I feel like I'm "wasting" good content by posting it when no one is even seeing it. Thanks again for the comment! Have a great week. :)
Absolutely! I'm new myself, but I posted stuff that didn't get the attention I was hoping for and am seeing why. My stuff wasn't even as much of a labor as yours, so I completely understand your frustration. You have a very clean style with great visuals. I am an avid reader, that's about as far as my "expertise" goes, but if I knew any elementary aged kids or tweens I'd show them your story based off of the first chapter. Twirble's resteem brought me here btw.
Nice story. I tried writing a book like this once. Keep at it, and don't give up. Looking forward to more
Thank you! I appreciate the feedback. :)
No problem. Let me know if you ever need an illustrator
Definitely will. I just took a look at some of your work and really dig your art style.
@gmuxx sent me to this link so I'm going to read this later. Don't have time right now, but I'm looking forward to this story.
Amazing, nice post , i upvote you and follow you, follow me back, adn dont forget view my post
Thank you Hopefully we become good friends