Regnad Kcin- Private Eye... The Case of the Erstwhile Accountant- Part II

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It was mid-afternoon when I hit the Pimpledick offices and it was pouring down rain. I ran from the parking lot to the building reminding myself on the way to stop smoking and buy some wiper blades for the old ZX. When I entered the door that said Harold Pimpledick Certified Public Accountant I was greeted with the not too subtle aroma of jasmine... it hit me like a wet towel smacking a locker room wall. An androgynous creature dressed all in black minced his(?) way toward me.

The bad Andy Warhol parody intoned: "Miss Elnora told me to expect you. I'm Philip with one l, Mr. Pimpledick's personal assistant"... heavy on the personal. "You will find Har, er, Mr. Pimpledick won't you?"

"Right now I have very little to go on," I told him. "Maybe you could help."

"Anything I can do," Philip with one l said with a smile. I don't know if it was the smile or the way he said "anything" that made me more uncomfortable.

"Would you show me his office please?" I asked.

"Right this way," he said leading me up an aisle with four or five desks on either side toward a large oak door inscribed with PRIVATE. Nobody even looked up as we walked past. Maybe not everyone wanted him found after all. We entered the private office and I could tell right away that the place had been scrubbed clean- it looked unused. I'd bet a C note even an expert couldn't find as much as a fingerprint in here.

"Does he have an address book, a day planner, anything that might give me a lead or two?" I could tell I wasn't going to find anything searching the place, but I gave it a go anyway. I started opening the drawers in the large mahogany desk. Looking around the room I noticed there were no pictures- none of the family, Elnora, or even himself. This looked more like a movie set than an accountants office. One drawer on the lower left of the desk was locked. "Do you have a key to this?" I asked. I was becoming impatient.

"Yes, but..." Philip began.

"Listen sweetie," I told him. "This whole deal is beginning to stink worse than that perfume you got on. I better start getting some cooperation or I'm going to keep that nice little retainer Miss Pimpledick gave me and go on my merry way."

"No... wait," he said producing a small key from his keyring. The drawer was empty. "That's where Mr. Pimpledick's address book and personal effects were... they're gone."

"Who has a key, besides yourself?" I asked watching for a reaction. "Just Mr. Harold and myself... and Miss Elnora."

Ah, Miss Elnora. Why would she call the assistant and warn him I was coming? I was beginning to like this less and less.

"Why doesn't Mr. Pimpledick have any picures... you know, of family, a pet dog, anything?" I asked. He was getting nervous- his body language was very telling. He kept fidgeting and looking at his watch. "Do you have someplace you need to be?" I asked letting him know I was paying attention.

"Er, no," he stammered. "Mr. Harold was a very private person. He didn't go in for those sorts of things."

"Was?" I asked. Philip with one l was getting visibly upset. I'd bet if I worked him for another half hour I could get this one to confess to the Black Dahlia murder.

"What?" he looked as if I'd kicked him in the gut. He minced his way to the sofa where he threw himself down and began sobbing uncontrollably. I gave him my handkerchief... this was getting old, two in one day. He gathered himself up a bit and began:

"Harold and I were lovers... are," he corrected himself. "I just know something bad has happened. Ever since he started working for that cop- the commissioner. He's evil, Mr. Kcin. Harold found some really bad stuff that was going on... he wouldn't tell me what. He said he wanted to protect me."

"Ok," I said. "At least I have something to go on now. Is there anything else you think I should know?"

He drew close... a little too close for comfort and said in a low voice, almost a whisper: "Be careful of Miss Elnora, she isn't what she seems."

"What do you mean?" I asked softly.

"She's evil, that one," he whispered. "I'm afraid to say anymore right now."

I thanked him for his help and gave him a card telling him to call if he thought of anything else that might help.

"You will find Harold won't you?" he asked handing my handkerchief back.

"Keep it," I said, "I'll write it off on my taxes." It had stopped raining when I got outside and I called Flora.

"Get on that magic computer baby and find out whatever you can about the Pimpledicks... everything," I told her.

"Ok boss," she said, "but watch out for that Elnora- something isn't right about her."

That's the second time I was warned about her in one day, I thought. Flora was a bright girl with great instincts. I headed off to the bank to see what the safe deposit box had in store.