"Shiela Wasn't Always a Vampire, You Know..." by Richard F. Yates

Back in the 1970s, Shiela was a pre-school teacher, but she had an altercation with an abusive father (technically, she scratched the crap out of his face for yelling at his four-year-old daughter for spilling her juice) and was fired. After that, she worked briefly as a cashier at a mini-mart (but quit after the place was robbed twice in the same week,) and she eventually took a job as a waitress at a sleazy nightclub (which played decent disco music on the weekends.)

It was while working a weekend shift that Shiela spotted STEVE, a permed demi-god in a wide lapelled, white leisure suit doing "The Hustle" on the lighted dancefloor---and she fell instantly in lust. (She was single, so it was okay---though honestly she wasn't very experienced in intimate relations...)

Steve spotted Shiela as well, and after ordering a Harvey Wallbanger, he asked Shiela what time she WANTED to get off. (Steve was slick like that.) Shiela said her shift ended at 2:00 A.M.---and Steve said he'd be waiting.

Of course Steve was really a vampire, and he slipped her the fangs before they'd gone "all the way," which Shiela took rather poorly. Within a week of being "turned," Shiela killed Steve for flirting with an airline stewardess (she let the stewardess off with a stern warning)---and then she tracked down that abusive jackass that got her fired from the preschool and drained him dry AND tore his head off, just for spite.

Now, Shiela runs a feminist-leaning teen magazine aimed at giving young women the self confidence to define themselves as individuals WITHOUT having to rely on a male companion for wholeness. And, yes, she still hates Harvey Wallbangers...

---Richard F. Yates

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