#88: We need more pollution

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“Ummm....Boss?” Chad said...

“Yeah son? Whatcha need?” Shelby replied. The two were in ‘The Wizard’s Keep’. It had started out as a small storage building and they had made some changes until it was a shop. They built stuff in it.

“We need more SSmoke. And by “more” I mean a metric-buttload.” Chad said. “Tier One improvements have used up all the garbage and waste. We’re recycling 100% and that’s not enough. We need to go industrial. Problem is where do we get the feedstock.”

“There’s always the river.” Shelby replied.

“Ah...good point.” Chad said “Stationary or mobile?”

“Yes.” Shelby said.

“Silly question. Do we centralize the SmokeForge or Distribute that function also.” Chad asked..

“That definitely was a silly Question.” Shelby scoffed.

“Gotcha....massively parallel, highly redundant and widely distributed it is. I’ll start working on some plans.” Chad replied.

........................
(days later)
(upstream from Flint Island)

The bottom feeding SmokeBot was shaped like a catfish but it was larger than a sports car. Close up it sounded as if the poor thing had the mother of all cases of indigestion. pop-pop-crackle-pop-pop- pop-pop-crackle-pop-pop

IF there had been any sonar operators listening to the river they might have wondered at the noise they heard on their hydrophones. It sounded like a cross between popcorn popping and bacon frying...with occasional fireworks.

The BottomFeeder slowly cruised the bottom of the river and slurped up garbage, trash and various forms of junk, filtering the water as it went. It didn’t ingest anything that was obviously alive. It didn’t kill anything but it cleaned up carrion. It didn’t eat anything metallic either but anything else it found went down it’s gullet. (It did, however, survey every square inch of the river bottom that it passed over making note of everything that it saw)

Anything that it swallowed was immediately reduced to it’s basic molecular components. Common gases such as Oxygen and Nitrogen were vented directly into the river, neither of which are particularly soluble in water, and bubbled to the surface and into the air. The water was thus somewhat oxygenated in it’s wake. Other fish in the river were grateful.

Any elements of potential value it segregated and stored. Certain elements, mostly carbon, were used to build Structural Smoke. The indigestion sound was that of the fabrication process. Chad and Shelly had discovered a micro-explosive forging technique.

When it’s storage bins were full the Bottom Feeder Returned to Base on Flint Island. It’s cargo was unloaded and it immediately returned to the river for more pollution and trash.

Dozens of other’s like it were cleaning up the river both upstream and downstream.

..............................

“One of our new bottom feeders has hit the mother lode” Shelby told Chad. “it’s found a tire dump. I’ve routed other BFs to help.”

“Oh my.” Chad could just imagine.

“That’ll help the cause” Shelby said. “at this rate our current Dragon Egg bins will be full in an hour or so?”

“Yup.” Chad told him. “Do we call this batch caviar?”

Shelby frowned...he hated it when someone thought of a good pun before he did.

.................
(Next Morning)

“Do you have good news oh ArchMage?” Kamiko Akiyama, the mayor smiled to show she was joking. She, The Orc brothers, and Chad were having coffee and donuts as they normally did every morning.

“That I do oh Dreaded Dragon Lady.” Shelby gave as good as he received. He also smiled...to show that he to, was joking. “We’ve got the bottom feeders working full time and they’ve been living up to their name. They’re cleaning the river bottom and doing a fair job of filtering the river water also. We’ve also got stationary strainers installed here and there. The water goes in dirty and comes out clean. All the storage bins are full to the brim.

“TierOne is secure.” He said.

“Ah...good news indeed. She agreed.

..............................

“Hmmmmm” Chad was speaking to himself...again. Shelby wasn’t too proud to listen in. Sometimes it was an interesting conversation. Chad had been reviewing the bottom feeder logs.

“You know.” Chad muttered. “These guys are doing a fair job of surveying the river bottom”

He didn’t say anything else for half an hour. Shelby got impatient.

“And?” he finally said

“And what?” Chad replied.

“What about the bottom survey.” Shelby asked .

“Oh that. Nothing really. We just have a record now of the characteristics of the river bottom for miles in either direction...and the location of a lot of iron junk.” Chad replied.

“What’s it look like?” Shelby asked.

“Mostly mud.” he said...

“Well duh.” Shelby replied.

Nothing was said for hours.

“Sandbags” Shelby said “But mud will work.”

“...but there’s a sand bar close by” Chad said “less than a mile upstream. Slightly submerged. Sand works better than mud.“

“Perfect.” Shelby said “ We need a sandbagger. Do you think you can come up with something?”

“On it Boss” Chad replied. Great minds think alike and the two Mages had been thinking about a solution to the threat of flooding...Chad had some radical ideas..

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‘Ewwwwww” Shelby said .

“Sorry boss.” Chad replied “ I was in a hurry.”

“Well what ever works. I don’t want to be the one to explain this to the Dragon Lady.” he said

“Explain what to me...” Kamiko said. She had noticed her two Maggi in rapt discussion beside the river and was curious about what they were dong. She strolled over to see. For prior combat troopies they sometimes neglected situational awareness she thought. She was wrong. The Maggi IFF system had identified her as friend a long time ago so she was still alive. They both knew she was there.

She joined them.

“Ewww what?” she asked then saw what the two mages were looking at then she saw it.

“Ewwwwwww what...is that?” she asked.

“Sand Bagger” Shelby said “it’s Chad’s fault”

Kamiko grinned “Ah yes. Young boys...infatuated with poop jokes.”

Chad blushed “It’s not like that at all....not really. This was just the most efficient design.”

“Sure it was” The Dragon Lady said looking at the half ton Salamander like robot that was pooping ‘filled and sealed’ sandbags onto a precise pattern along the shore of the island. “Sure it was.....hmmm...actually it might well be. Form follows function.”

“Exactly right.” Chad said. “Those short legs and the webbed feet give it good speed through the water. It can also walk along the bottom. The feet give it good traction when it needs to scoop something up. Like sand from the sandbar. The short wide snout is like a bucket loader for scooping up the sand. Once it's inside the the sand is bagged , injected with stabilizer and stored...then it returns to the job site and...”

“...poops it’s load” Shelby said....laughing.

“right where it needs to be.” Chad persevered.

“...a regular ScooperPooper” the Dragon Lady was also chuckling. “It’s certainly building that retaining wall

quickly.”

Chad groaned. That name would stick. Might as well own it. “I have a number of Scooper-Poopers scooping and pooping. They’re building an extra strong, forty foot thick wall all around the island. It’s a levy really. Shelby and I tested it. A day after it’s pooped it’s stronger than the best reinforced concrete.”

“At some point we’ll decide how high is high enough. The upstream part of the wall is shaped like a ships prow pointing directly into the current flow. If derbies come floating downriver it will divert them to either side.” He finished. “the levies on either side are smooth. The derbies have nothing to hang up on. They should just slide past without causing any damage.”

“Hope we don’t need it.” Shelby said.

“I hope we don’t need it either” the Dragon lady said. “but it’s still raining and the water is still rising. Better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it. That goes a long ways toward securing Tier two. We’re safer now from physical threats. Flooding I mean.”

When the levies are five foot above the water all around the island split your efforts between it and operation umbrella. I’m getting damn tired of this incessant rain.” she said.

“You and us both” Shelby and Chad both agreed

............................................
The Next Episode will be
#89: Umbrella…
The Previous Episode was
#87: Food…
the First episode was
#1 : Prologue

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