I think that is how it was spelled anyways

After many long months waiting for a placement, I finally heard back from the one I actually wanted to go to the most It had a great reputation thus far among the girls, though what it really was is some girls that went there afterwards was reportedly doing very well after doing the program and going fully out on their own. So I was so excited to have heard back from Brens Home.

Brens Home was a half way house independent living program

The state paid them $850 a day per girl that was placed in the home. It was ran by a Fairbanks Hospital and was a home for girls. Fairbanks is a rehab hospital for those addicted to drugs and alcohol though I never had an alcohol problem I did pretend to have one, so I could get out of the cottage in girl school and meet up with a friend of mine in another cottage. It was the only time you were allowed to talk to those outside your group. And it ended up being my way out of the DOC's Girl's School. So I was willing to go to AA meetings if it meant that I could have my freedom.

The day I was released

I had to go have my released papers signed by different staff members, from the school to medical to therapists. Once I was done with all of that. I was processed out and given a check for the money that was on my books. Though my parents didn't want me home, they did pad my account over that 8 months and I left with about $600 saved up that I hadn't spent in the commissary. A van with a staff member from Brens Home came and picked me up with 2 other girls in the van with her. I knew one of them, she had been released some months before, and she told me there was another girl that I knew that was there but she was at work right now. Besides those three and myself there was one other resident in Brens Home.

Do the math it will be important later

$850 per resident per day times 5 residents is a total of $4250 a day times that by just 30 days a month the place was bringing in $127,500 a month. It was staffed during the day with 2 staffers, at night 1 and a part time therapist and a nutritionist that did our food shopping. They did not pay for anything for us other than food, if you needed soap you better buy it, they wouldn't. We did the cleaning, the cooking and we also had to go to school if we didn't have a diploma yet and get a job and go to AA meeting along with group therapy. I am willing to do all this because once I graduate I will be able to move out on my own, if I maintain a job and savings.

So I get enrolled in a GED program and found a job

With-in 48 hours I was enrolled in a GED program and with-in a week I had landed a job at A&W Rootbeer in the mall. It wasn't much, but I had a job and was going to school. I planned to save every dime I could, and was going to get out on my own as quickly as possible. Things were going good for about a month. Then an announcement was made. They were moving us into Fairbanks Hospital because they said they couldn't afford to rent the house we were in. In my mind and still to this day it makes me go Wait, you are getting $127, 500+ a month for us 5 kids and you can't afford the rent on the house that is $1500 a month?

So me and my two friends got to talking, we all three came from being locked up, where the other two came from CHIN cases and foster home situation, they had no clue what it was like to be locked up in a institution, but we did and when they explained how it was going to work, we were going to basically be locked down again. We were mad, because if there money wasn't there to pay the bills we knew it was because it was being misused. And were were angry about it. So we decided we were not moving to the hospital and we packed up our backpacks with what we each needed. Took all of our money, and left.

Yes we were technically runaways

We stayed together for a few nights, but soon after we all went our separate ways, to be honest, I left them because they were both stupid and was gonna get us caught. I decided that I needed to get a roof over my head. But I knew that I needed a job to do that and it wasn't like I could go back to A&W Rootbeer, I would get caught if I did that. So I went and applied at a Hardee's in Indianapolis, not even 4 miles from Brens home and not even 2 miles from Fairbanks. I had about $1500 saved up by this point so when I was hired on the spot, I went looking for a solution for my housing situation.

I knew I couldn't rent anywhere without emancipation papers so I decided to hit the local laundry mats bulletin board as someone in the neighborhood told me that people post for roommates there. Sure enough there was more than one to choose from. I looked through and found a woman looking for a roommate she was a single mom and would only charge $100 a month for a room if she trusted you enough to watch her children occasionally. If not the rent if she decided to rent to you would be $250 a month. I called the number and met with her, and she liked me and I got the room at $100 a month. I watched her two kids a couple of days a week for a couple of hours. I felt like I got the better end of the deal. It was close to work but the downside is that it was in a really bad neighborhood.

I was making money and friends

I was making money and friends. I was getting comfortable in my new life. I never worried about getting caught even though I knew I was in violation of my parole. I didn't care, all I cared about is that I wasn't locked up right then and there. I knew that eventually I would have to face leaving, but at this time I was living my life and having a blast doing it. Then things got really real in my life. One of my friends and I was walking down the street one day when someone who didn't like us decided to try to take us out all the sudden out of now where a car came flying down the street shooting at us. Terry aka TT pushed me to the ground, saved my life, sadly though he was shot multiple times and was killed. His dying words was for get out of this neighborhood. I managed to make it to a pay phone on the corner and call the police I told them who I was and what was going on and that I had ran away from Brens home and was wanted.

I was taken to Fairbanks

I was surprised I wasn't taken back to girl school I was a parole violator and instead of being sent back right away they thought it best after the long interview that I was placed there instead of being locked up, though I had to answer for running away, the people in charge, did me a solid by at first putting me there before sending me back so I could get help for what I had been through and had witness. But that didn't last long. With-in two weeks I was turned back over to the DOC and was placed back into the DOC's Girl School

Going back to Girl School

I was sent back to girl school on a Wednesday cause that is the day they process inmates. I saw so many disappointed looks on staff members faces. Then they found out my ordeal of how I survived and some of those disappointed looks because looks of admiration weird enough. The other two girls were caught quickly. The one the day after I ditched her the other girl lasted a week longer. I lasted till I turned myself in because I had a job and wasn't mooching off others like they did. I depended only on myself.

The Parole Board

I was a parole violator so there was no courts involved in how I would be sentenced for violating my parole. I knew going in there I was going to get time for taking off from Brens Home. But something very surreal happened that day. I walked in and there was 6 board members and a judge (from my county) in the room. This is strange a Judge is here what is going on? I am thinking maybe it has to do with TT's murder. But then the Judge spoke. " Michelle, You need to listen closely because we are only going to offer this deal to you once. We believe you have proven you can taken care of yourself. Before coming here the first time you were working and paying rent, and when you came back the second time you were doing the same thing. So if you will tell us how you bypassed the YOC alarm system, we will emancipate you."

I looked around the room. I took a deep breathe in and said " This is a legit offer, I will have custody of myself and be able to live my life in the way I want to?" He looked me in the eyes and said "Yes" I looked at him and said "do you have it in writing?" He laughed and said yes he did. I spilled the beans on how I was disabling the alarm system. And an hour later I was walking out the front door. My parents picked me up, said I could stay with them till I got on my feet. It was a strange feeling, to walk out those doors discharge no parole no probation, a legal adult at 16 and a half years old. Life was about ready to change for me, and I was going to finally be fully in charge of where my story was now going to take me. I wasn't dependent on the state any longer. August 3rd 1994 I became a legal adult. That is one date ingrained in my memory.

You can find the rest of the story here at the following links
last part
sentence to DOC
pregnant
YOC
Runaway,throwaway
State custody for the 2nd time
State Custody