CPS Missouri...alleges nothing, keeps kids anyway.
This is another one of those cases that just gnaws at the pit of your stomach like a bad plate of mussels. This amazing mother deserves SO much better from a society that is supposed to be all about helping single mothers. She has two long blog posts which I will link below and then summarize for you:
https://www.livingwhole.org/inside-my-battle-with-child-protective-services/
Her other website is: meganredshaw.com
(Megan Redshaw..courtesy of her blog.)
Here is a bit about Megan, excerpted from her blog as well:
"I finished college at nineteen with a degree in political science. I started my first blog around that time (Don’t even think about looking for it!) to chronicle my journey battling Crohn’s, philosophy on life, and recipes (which I hilariously thought were healthy at the time.) My desire to save the world from itself motivated me to go to law school, and my love for food and natural medicine (along with my desire to do 5,000 things at once) led me to the study of natural health. I have a law degree, am a certified Natural Health Educator, became a certified Naturopath after completing four years of training at two different institutions, am a certified yoga instructor (Yes, I went through that phase.), am Pn1 (Precision Nutrition) certified, founded Live Beyond Words, Inc., which focuses on orphan care and poverty alleviation in the Democratic Republic of Congo, and worked as a marketing manager for a social media company before I jumped into blogging full-time."
As you can see from the above Megan does not really fit the typical profile of the type of person that CPS prefers to prey upon. She is brilliant, beautiful, well-spoken and most importantly-- KNOWS THE LAW. And, that may be the saddest part of this story-- which has been emerging since a couple weeks before Christmas. Apparently, "Child Protective" "Services" (CPS) in Missouri is going ahead and picking on a person who has a law degree BECAUSE they simply have no intention of following the law, have displayed that contempt for the law repeatedly, and seems to know that nobody in Missouri's Court systems can (or will) do anything about it. Now that is a scary situation for any parent to be caught in, because he/she is not going up against just one bad apple, but she's trying to dump over the whole rotten barrel!
(And..it's not just Megan having trouble with Missouri CPS.)
Briefly, Megan's story is as follows... She and her first husband of eight years had three children of their own when they decided to adopt two more--from The Congo. They had both become heavily involved in charity work in that impoverished nation, and Megan fell in love with the people, the culture, and eventually two very needy children...a boy and a girl. The couple went through the very long and convoluted process of adopting the children, including paying bribes to all the right people, and just before the children were to be flown to the United States, Megan's husband announced that he wasn't going to go through with the adoption, that he was having an affair and wanted a divorce, and that he would oppose any attempt by Megan to move on with her life--specifically with regard to the adoption.
After a continued new course of legal difficulties, she finally succeeded in getting both the children to her home in the States, and began to try putting her life back together, as a single mom with FOUR KIDS IN DIAPERS, and one (the adopted girl) with severe emotional/psychological issues. She worked miracles holding things together with very little help from anywhere--especially from stat agencies that are supposed to help in situations like this, but could not resolve the new daughter's problems, despite some psychological intervention.
Her ex-husband's best friends remained friendly with Megan after the divorce, and eventually they offered to adopt the two kids from the Congo even though Megan desperately wanted to keep them. Out of work and struggling financially, Megan eventually realized that these "fine folks" could give her little troubled adopted child the things that she couldn't, and she eventually yielded to their insistence but with a promise that should that couple ever decide they couldn't keep the kids that they would be returned to Megan.
Awhile later she received a text message from the couple--only one text--and nothing else...no returned text, requests by phone with details, etc....that Megan should come and get the kids by 6PM that very evening, and that they wanted the kids returned. Megan tried and tried to get confirmation of details. Where should they be picked up? What had happened? Was their new medical or psychological conditions she needed to be mad ware of? In short, she made it clear from her end that she definitely wanted them back, but she was unable to get any details of what exactly was needed. She didn't even have money for new car seats when that text message came.
Despite her best efforts, the other couple moved on, with CPS intervention, to give the kids over to another couple! Megan was not notified of this until the process was well under way and the guardian ad litem (GAL) had already determined WITHOUT CAUSE, charge, OR EVEN ALLEGATION, that Megan was not capable to take the kids back. During this time, as well, her ex-husband, who never showed any interest in the kids after the divorce, was suddenly brought-- by CPS-- back into the picture and despite not even paying his court-ordered child support for his own three kids (still with Megan) has been a constant "adviser" to CPS, and constantly has been doing everything possible to oppose whatever Megan has wanted to do.
From there, Megan has endured an absolute travesty of "justice" and is still fighting for her adopted children. She has remarried, gotten her financial difficulties improved, etc., and yet the State of Missouri is simply ignoring all of their own laws and refuses to give custody either to Megan, her parents, or other family members. Her parents and uncle and aunt have all made themselves available to take the kids, gone through extensive screening, with NO NEGATIVES EVER GIVEN, and yet though state law gives them preference over the third American placement for these poor kids, there is nothing.
We can assume that the current couple must have paid somebody very well, and that they are being illegally supported by powerful people behind the scenes. It's got to be that, or something to do with the guardian ad litem (GAL) not wanting to admit and face up to her own failures to make proper decisions. Here is how the courts define a GAL:
"A 'guardian ad litem' (GAL) is a person the court appoints to investigate what solutions would be in the 'best interests of a child.' Here, we are talking about a GAL in a divorce or parental rights and responsibilities case."
Megan makes it clear that, for whatever reason, the GAL assigned by the courts to her case definitely has it in for her. maybe she just doesn't like being faced with a parent that knows the law way better than she does. Maybe she just doesn't like something about Megan...jealous of her looks, her intelligence, her ability to surmount difficulties like a champ that almost no one else could ever have surmounted. Whatever the cause, this GAL is doing nothing to benefit these poor children who are now in the hands of the fourth set of parents in the space of just a few months.
But again, worst of all, this is a clear case of the law being openly and blatantly flaunted. Those Congolese adoptees belong either with Megan, her parents, or her aunt and uncle. ALL OF THEM have priority under the law, and yet, somehow, the CPS seems, again, to be ABOVE THE LAW--at least in Missouri. You can sing up for updates and notifications from Megan. There are dozens of very supportive comments below each of the links above.
FYI...this beautiful Christian mom has NEVER been on drugs, or alcohol. She has no criminal record, has never had an allegation of ANYTHING made against her--for "abuse," "neglect" or anything else. In fact, she is sure that if she did have such a record, that her case would have been treated with greater deference by CPS. Ahem...(did I mention that maybe CPS doesn't like Christians either...??)
Please do pray for Megan. Sign up at her blog. Leave her an encouraging comment.
THIS SHALL NOT AND MUST NOT STAND!!
Thank goodness @familyprotection is out there helping these families!
I used to follow her blog! I read about how she adopted the children, her unexpected divorce, and that part of her struggle. Thus it was difficult for me to read this update about how CPS has become involved.
This wonderful lady, and those precious children, do NOT deserve this type of treatment. It is even more scary that they have acted this way with someone so educated in life and in the law.
Thank-you @mepatriot for bringing this to my attention.
Yes, that was the part that alarmed me the most...that they would feel no qualms about steadfastly ignoring the law in front of (and against) someone so smart and well versed in the law. To me, that is a disturbing omen.
Thank YOU for all your support for people caught in this horrible CPS vice of corruption and lawlessness.
I read one story where they took the children of a lawyer, who had been successfully fighting cases against CPS. The lawyer got the children back in a few months, but it was obvious that they did this only to threaten him to stop getting in their way. That case really bothered me too, as it shows how far they can go to get revenge against anyone helping victims of their abusive system.
WOW. That is terrifying. Maybe we aren't making the kind of progress that we may have thought we were...
Perhaps certain individual states/provinces/regions are slowly moving in a better direction, but then there are plenty (probably the majority) that are the same or just getting worse. I know that in the province where I live, certain towns/cities are worse than others. My town is one of the very worst, and even a lawyer I spoke to last winter, in a neighbouring town who has taken on cases against CPS, says that the place I am in is way worse than the other towns that he has served. He also told me that he has been backing off from these types of cases, and hinted that he has been pressured or threatened. At any rate, he can't take it any more.
Yes, we have a long way to go to win this. That is why I think the the most important thing that we can accomplish here at @familyprotection is educating parents of what they could be facing if they do not know their rights and if they blindly co-operate with a CPS investigation. Most (but not all) of these injustices can be shut down right at the beginning if people are educated.
I couldn't agree more. MASS EDUCATION of parents is critical.
That's one of the reasons I cheer every time the censoring social media platforms take a another black eye. From everything I've seen, Steemit is almost unanimous on the need for CPS reform (or abolition.)
If all those social media users get sick of the censorship at the other places, I am hoping your efforts will expand beyond your wildest dreams here as Steemit grows. A critical mass of people understanding the dire nature of the problem MAY eventually force changes at national levels that will level things out and enhance parental rights.
Curated for #informationwar (by @openparadigm)
Ways you can help the @informationwar!
FreezePeach
Thanks a million, op!
I do pray for her.
You are a GOOD man, Joey!
I read Megans stories, two and two just weren't adding up to four so I googled her name, seems I am not the only person who had questions about some of the events....like why she just didn't go pick up the kids when asked, here's some interesting read about from another's perspective which I am more prone to agree with.
http://www.whatistheharm.com/blog/the-harm-of-megan-heimerredshaw
Yes, she had adopted these kids, but her perception of what she is and what happened is immensely skewed. Her ex-husband did not abandon these kids since he tried to tell her he did not want the life she was making for them. For granted it can be said that her ex-husband was an asshole for this, but he still told her before the kids arrived, before this was all finalized. She knew that she faced a huge uphill battle if she did this alone, but she still chose to. She keeps claiming these kids would've died and that she saved their lives but never once gives any idea as to what that means. Are we just left to assume they'd die because they were in Africa? She then explains how she was not eligible for any help, social services, or respite because her husband was listed on a form as the kids' father. For granted I know states vary in family court laws but in many states social services will still offer things like food stamps, health insurance, respite, and other assistance. If not social services then family organizations will grant these to families who apply and who are in need. I admit that in her state this may not have been a possibility, though it doesn't seem as though she tried all avenues either. Instead, it reads like laundry list of excuses rather than a list of efforts.
The parts that I just can't get past though is both the moment where she gave up her kids, and then after fighting to get them back, she refuses to pick them up when she finally received a text telling her she can come and pick them up and take them back! Regarding why she didn't pick them up that day she gives another long list of excuses, rather than an effort to get a car and pick them up. She mentions earlier when she first moved her kids here to the states that she and the kids "cocooned" for four months. That means these kids who were strangers in a strange land were trapped in a house with Megan, her three other kids, one of which was a newborn, and only left for the non-stop therapy Megan set up for the kids. She explains how they prayed, how she tried to help them adjust to things here, and even had to teach her daughter how to behave around men. She explains some medical issues the kids had but with Megan's parenting approach on health I can't help but to wonder how often these kids were fed Kate Tietje's unregulated concoctions that the Modern Alternative Mama would whip up in her dirty kitchen.
What is most telling though, is how Megan wraps all of this up in this second blog post. First she says,
"I don't know where I will go from here. I have spent six years advocating for my adopted children, over seven months wrapped up in this process, missed my bar exam to attend their hearing this summer because I supposedly "don't love my children," took the forced psych evaluation that was ordered on no grounds, have been interrogated, lied to, lied about, harassed, undermined, and deprived of my rights, provided 300+ videos to their therapist to counteract whatever false narrative she's been given, filed my case in the Court of Appeals, have contacted senators, representatives, and governing authorities, filed grievances, and continue to advocate for my children."
And then she goes on to give a step by step of how things need to change. This includes everyone standing up to fight against the system, then in one part she says,
"Maybe we should start requiring mandatory education for all DFS employees so that they understand the policies and repercussions for not following them, as well as mandatory education on special conditions many parents face like reactive attachment disorder, autism, PTSD, and sensory processing issues and how these various conditions vary among different ethnic groups and nationalities. Talking to these people about how reactive attachment disorder presents in a children that have come from a third world country and spend most of their lives inside a concrete room is like trying to teach a car mechanic how to make the perfect pesto. They just don't get it, or they downplay the severity of these conditions which hurts both the families and the children who desperately needs resources."
For the record, I know some car mechanics that are awesome cooks, pesto and all.
In all seriousness though, I realize orphanages in developing countries are likely to largely be less than ideal. But to hear Megan explain these places is like a bunch of kids living in filth and feces in a dungeon left to fight for their own survival. That it's only through the good Christian heroic women like Megan that these kids not only get a chance to thrive, but even get a chance to survive. Between her perception of her role as the adoptive parent here, and her constant testament to this victimization by not only a children and family agency, but by the court, the guardian ad litem, her ex-husband, even the country she adopted her kids from by their attempt to bribe her for more money, and from the prosecutors in each of these court visits, it becomes apparent that Megan has a victim complex and a need to be seen by outsiders as a savior to these kids. What's so troubling about this though is that she likely caused or added to much of their trauma during the time they have known Megan. She adds towards the end how her daughter is calling this new mom "mom" already as though this is a bad thing for all involved when in actuality it's just a bad thing for Megan because she wants to be the "mom" more than she wants these kids to be adjusted and to feel at home. If her daughter feels she found a "mom" in this new home, then I can't think of anything more wonderful for her daughter. This isn't an adoption vs biological difference of opinion either, at least not entirely. If Megan had adopted these kids since a very early age and had them for a long time, I would feel differently about this. If Megan became their mom shortly after birth and had these kids for close to 5 years then Megan would in fact be their mom in every sense of the word. This isn't what happened though. She had these kids for a short time, struggled the entire time, and explains their time with her as a huge and difficult path to adjustment, just before she gives them up and then fails to get them back the first chance she's given to take them back. At this point, every attempt she makes appears to doing more harm than good for these kids. Both of these blog posts read as victimizations of Megan, slights against Megan, Megan's struggles, Megan's fights, Megan's unfair treatment, and Megan's wants. They do not read as a troubled road for two adopted children who need and want a family.
These posts are in fact so little about these two children that I still have no idea what fatal fate they faced in their home country should they had been forced to stay there. Instead, I hear all about how Megan saved them, it's about her heroic deeds, her martyrdom, it's not about the children or any troubles they faced.
I didn't get a chance to really add this to the blog post, though it is too good to go unmentioned. There's a website called pandce.proboards.com, and on these boards is a thread called
"Dr." Megan Heimer's lies, falsifications, and inaccuracies.
The thread was started in 2014 and tapered off in 2016. It is about 48 pages long and it is nothing short of hilarious. I believe there is another thread regarding Megan on this website but this thread is the most entertaining. I'm serious....make some popcorn. At one point Megan even tries to comment as a fan defending Megan (herself) but is busted by the thread moderator due to Megan using the same IP address as she used in the past as herself. I'll post screen shots below for a teaser.
1 Comment
Angela 12/20/2018 07:41:36 am
Love this post! I’ve been popping onto her FB page every once in a while to see what’s going on. I would love to hear her ex husband’s side of things. My gut feeling is that Megan got completely overwhelmed with the adoption and couldn’t handle all of those kids. She gave them up, then when she got remarried she wanted them back.
She has a history of lying on the internet. There was a blog post about her on another site a few years ago, in response to her “Dear Parents” post. She made up user names and pretended to defend herself. They caught her through IP checks!!
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