I have always loved horses, as a child I loved to be around them, but I never wanted to ride them. I still don't. I have never been a fan of humans using animals for their own benefit. But that said I two have 2 dog companions and 3 cat companions.

Two years ago I done a 2 month Trek across the Sierra Nevada with a friend of mine and our children. We had a horse each which we used to carry our belongings and sometimes our children. My friend had one boy at the time age 4 and I had my 2 girls aged 3 and 6. This was really my first time to actually get to really know these beautiful creatures. As I already said I always admired them, but it was always from a distance, I never had any, in my life before.

But then the opportunity came to do this trek with my friend, we hoped to raise money for Syrian Refugees and the Local Free school in the mountains. I was a bit hesitant as I had no experience with horses, but I also saw it as a huge opportunity to spend some time with them and learn much more about them and also my oldest daughter really, really loves horses and she was super excited when I began to show some interest in doing the trek.

She has always been super confident around them and constantly asks when she can have her own horse. This has led to some interesting conversations about the difference between ownership and being responsible for another being. I do not believe we have any owner ship over any other living being, but if you bring an animal into your life then you are responsible for it's well being if it can not manage that by itself. It is still a conversation we have today, but now she will come to me and tell me ho some people tell her how such and such is their animal and how upset they get when she tells them you can not really own another being.

So when I decided to do the trek I knew I had to get used to leading a horse, something I did not really feel so good about as I wanted to just walk beside her. But that is not possible when walking narrow pathways in the mountains. The weeks leading up to our departure I would visit my friend who had managed to buy one horse for herself and find one that I could look after for those 2 months.

I did not want to buy a horse firstly because I could not afford to and also because I knew I was not in a position to look after one once we finished the trek. I live in a truck and we like to move around, so we do not have space for a horse with us. So being able to find someone who was happy for me to look after their horse, was the main thing that really helped me make up my mind about doing the trek.

The first few times, I would just go into the field where they were and sit down next to a tree and read a book. Every time they would come and check me out, sniffing my hair and body. I would be sitting there with a huge smile on my face really wanting to reach out and pet them, but holding back because I wanted them to get to know me first. In the end they would hang out next to me, munching on grass and being awesome.

The horse I was going to be leading was half Andalusian and half Arab. The first few times I tried to lead her, I felt quite nervous, she was not a huge horse but she is powerful and walking beside her I could feel that power, she automatically wanted to lead me instead. Which to me is quite normal. I remember a local vet who came to help with her papers, telling me to be a lot more forceful with her as that was the only way I would be able to lead her. He took her rope and sure enough she fell in beside him, but that was not the relationship I wanted with her. He was very forceful with her and I could see she walked behind him out of fear.

I remember doubting myself at that point, thinking well I can't do that. I won't do that so maybe I should just walk away. I do not like dominance over any thing, it makes my skin crawl, but it also at times makes me want to run and hide, because it makes me feel weak, which is exactly why it is happening in the first place, to weaken others.

All I wanted was to form a relationship with this beautiful horse, I did not want to use intimidation to get her to follow me, I did not want to dominant her. In the end I did not have too. Horses are so sensitive and they pick up on how you are feeling, they very much live in the present. If you are not feeling confident and self assured well then they do not want to follow you and who can blame them.

So the best thing for me to do, was to tap into my power, to be fully present and confident. As long as I done that then Solas was more than happy to walk beside me. Yet the minute I doubted myself she would try to lead me. So everyday I had to step into my power and walk with her and sometimes lead her, it was amazing. Everyday I would take a deep breathe, close my eyes, feel my strength within myself and tell myself that yes I am present and I am powerful and today we will walk together, and we did. The highest compliment she gave me was when she chose to stand over my tent and sleep at night. I was not prepared for how loud horses snore. I was also worried in case she awoke suddenly and stepped on the tent, but she never did.

I owe her so much gratitude, she has taught me one of the most valuable lessons in my life.

I am including a link for an amazing documentary called the way of the horse, it takes natural horsemanship to another level. It really looks at whether or not if horses had the choice would they want to be with the people that own them or look after them, if you like horses please look at it.

Thank you @eco-alex for inspiring me to write this post, after reading your post today it brought back such lovely memories for me. Please check it out here https://steemit.com/ecotrain/@eco-alex/this-morning-i-discovered-30-wild-horses-in-the-meadows-so-beautiful-wow

Big Big Thank You To @byn for designing my logo.

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