Desiré my Darling...
Enter man on an empty street close to midnight. He looks towards the light shining from a second-floor apartment and yells.
"Oh Desire, oh my Desire!"
"I long for the day I get to embrace you, kisses so sweet and tender. My dear Desire!"
A little something to listen while you suffer
A silhouette of a woman appears in the window. The neighbours seemingly undisturbed by this mans noise. She opens the window and leans out in her silk gown, dark black hair framing the face of an angel, pale skin luminescent in the moonlight, as she responds in frustration like only true angels can.
"Now you listen to me you sick little man, all I did was say thank you to your pasty skinned dumb face at the supermarket. That was a month ago! What is wrong with you motherfucker? Don't you have a goat to impregnate or something?
"Get it in your thick skull yo ass is gonna go to jail in about 10 minutes, I told ya I ain't got no time for this shit I am a good lady, I gave you a chance to stop this but enough is enough, I am flattered but you scare me looking all weird and skinny like that.
"Don't you eat? You know what I don't even care the cops will be here any second, you hear that? Any second!"
Silence in the street, the pasty skinned dumb face man seems unsure, the angel in the sky has her hand on her hips as if she is holding that baby she always wanted. We hear cop sirens far, far... far off in the distance.
The man speaks.
"But Desire we have a connection, I felt the sparks when your finger touched my hand ever so briefly as you took your shopping away from me with such force it was unmistakable chemistry and you clearly felt it also."
"I saw the strain in your beautiful face as you had to keep yourself from ripping my clothes off right there on the check-in."
The angel responds in an angelic pitch which makes a distant wolf howl as the dogs were too scared to utter a sound.
"You were ogling me you little freaky dick. here is a question. Who is this Desire?"
The man does not respond to her question as he stammers on with a clearly rehearsed selection of words. Which the writer may or may not have forced into the piece because it is the only thing to a punchline he can think of.
"My dear Desire, I wish to lay with you my face in your luscious dark curls, your fragrance filling my soul, your taste envigorating my being."
The angel throws her hands up in the air, her dressing gown appearing to become pink wings of silk. The light shining from behind in an angelic glow, a halo almost being formed. Almost.
"That is it, for your information you little limp dick, Adams family hair wearing, pasty ass no eating, goat impregnating, ogling wannabe Romeo. My name is Desiré!"
"d eh - z uh - r eh! Get it?"
"Good, and for your information and not that yo Amish ass needs to know this my hair ain't naturally black, this shit is red mofo, which means yo dumb ass will be all nice and nestled in my curly reds because the carpet matches the drapes. Got that?"
Shocked at this new information and the cop sirens growing near but not near enough to warrant the man screaming like a girl and running away yelling as he ran.
"Witch! Run for your lives everyone she is a Witch. Burn the Witch!"
Desiré closes her window satisfied she has dealt with the situation, spotting one lone bum on the street that was watching from the shadows she throws him a zap. She heads to lay down on the bed and call her friend who knows about the ogling bag boy.
The friend: "How did you get him to leave like that?"
Desiré: "I told him I had a red bush."
The friend: "Girlfriend we tried that the colour won't take."
Desiré: Not for realz, I remembered mama telling me about them Puritans.
The writer cuts the story abruptly in the hope that the forced punchline will work better.
What? No comments?!
I have to say, my cheeks are hurting from laughing through your post. From the selection of Steempunk Opera to the satirical circus of human misinterpretations, polarized emotion and shock humor, I was very amused! :) Have to listen to the music in order to set the tone while reading.
You make everything sound so damn awesome. As I was reading your comment I am like yip I like that word and that word oooh that sounds amazing. Thank you for bringing some class to this joint.
I like that album, it was between that and The Rocky Horror Pictures Shows - Dammit Janet. I am glad the music seemed to fit maybe will try that more often.
Thanx for reading and commenting.
Sorry for the delay in response. I read this a couple days ago and just finding a moment to write back. I have to say though, that song, "Everything is Awesome" has been playing in my head every day since reading this LOL Ack!
Personally, I love the addition of music to a post - it sets the mood/emotion of the piece (to me) - it has to be the perfect one though and I think you definitely chose the right one for this. It's like painting with all the senses ;) The times I've used it (experimenting), I've not heard any feedback on it (I don't even know if people took the time to click on the music) but I do think it adds that special layer to the experience. I loved your post. :) So I suppose my words came from that.
Have a wonderful day, @penderis
wow! i just love how your brain works : first it was so sweet and tender and it turned malevolent. that the hell happened? LOL
you are amazing in your humor, writing and skill. no one like you Pen! :)
much love,
eagle spirit
Desiré happened, or more exactly my simplistic humour I think @youhavewings says it fancy when she calls it shock humour(spelt correctly) . At least at some level a bit of how what we can associate desire with affection but actually confuse it with infatuation and need a bit of a wake-up call or a guardian angel haha.
I will take the compliment and thank you for the tip, I can only use tipu if I delegate right and on a small delegation it is is not worth the time? Or can I kinda just send them money like a little storage account to easily send people tips?
i called it raging humor but to each his own. i got the message my friend and so very you. most importantly, brilliant in your expression.
tipu is 1 steem or 1 sbd to tipu and a message saying to store it for all future tipus. look at my wallet.
yes they are worth it bc its an incentive and helps people. i send them all the time when i see good work and not a lot of upvotes or attention. :p
there is a way to give more tipu than .10 but that gets more complicated. there is a blog that explains it all.
i also give a tree sometimes, i almost did for yours but with the past forking i wasnt about to get into that right now. hes slower and may have less mana than most.
planting a tree for someones post is also awesomesauce.
yours,
eagle spirit
Rage Humor I like that.... I again haha thank you. Tree planting does sound cool do we get to skype with our tree?
or scape it... landscape it 😜 badumdum
You deserve a
tip!
To check your balance I think you can do @tipu status
Hi @penderis! Here is your @tipU service user data:
Ok so that answers how I can since you don't bloody mention it simply in your posts.
here is a tip
See how nice that reads , no need for marketing fluff
I need to make a guide how to send tips ;) anyway if you want to sends tips, first send at least 0.1 SBD to @tipU with memo: deposit
Haha I did not expect you to be spying I like speaking to the void. Uhhmmmm I made a booboo I just sent some steem with a note saying GIMME THAT SHEEEET .... both steem and the note is wrong?
Will send it back in few hours when I will have access to the bot :)
youre the botter behind tipu? strange i just always talked to tipu 😂😂😂
em wow, LMAO i look into the void plenty and i added more sbd and resent. figures youd make a funny 🤣🤣
there is a guide. i give a lot of tipu so just readded and resent. shit happens.
Sorry, the tip is higher then your deposit.
You can check your balance by sending 0.001 SBD to @tipu with memo: balance
(the minimal tip is 0.1 SBD)
Let's try this again ... tip!
Hi @penderis! You have received 0.1 SBD tip from @eaglespirit!
@tipU voting service | For investors.
Hi! We are @steem-ua. We upvoted you! Why? Because we noticed that you published some pretty cool posts, such as this one!
We like to support you, to help you grow on Steem. Would you like to know more about how things work on Steem(it)? Then feel free to join our steem-ua Discord Server.
Once you have joined our steem-ua Discord Server, please talk to people you see in there that have the
UA Scoutrole. Tell them you have just joined, and like some help on how to make it big on Steemit. And they will help you!Good luck!
Kind regards, @steem-ua
PS: Discord is a Chat Server Program, you can sign up there for free, and meet and talk to a lot of people on Steemit!
Well it's a good thing it wasn't my pasty ass there. That would have got me scaling the building.
Hello @penderis, thank you for sharing this creative work! We just stopped by to say that you've been upvoted by the @creativecrypto magazine. The Creative Crypto is all about art on the blockchain and learning from creatives like you. Looking forward to crossing paths again soon. Steem on!