Anu Has A Baby - Constrained Writing Contest #18

This Story is based on the Celtic Goddess Anu

As she stood playing with the birds and the clouds and the fairies, making the dawn the amazing sight that it is, she heard a chatter that she had ignored for a long time.

Humans, they were still around. It had been a few centuries since she’d bothered with them. She tilted her ear to avoid the sound, but all that did, was tilt her nose in their direction. There was something intoxicating about their smell...

She put on her robe and made it down to the Island? She could have sworn it was a peninsula. What had these humans done?

She, the goddess of basic information, was immediately sucked in by all she didn’t know.

15 years later

She took a deep breath as she slowly peed on the stick. She waited for it to drip dry. She didn't bother to close her eyes or anything. They were always positive. Two lines before she even had time to lay the stick flat. Why she even bothered she didn’t know, she might as well just always assume that she was pregnant.

She’d liked what the humans had done. At first she was afraid. Traumatized even. But she was the goddess of death. And she could see that the current ways were dying. And she was the goddess of dawn, and she had already met the parents and grandparents of the new humans who would let the elephant roam in peace. So she’d decided to enjoy.

She’d fit right on once she let herself. Every era she had ever lived in had their have’s and have nots. Basic knowledge of the human psyche showed her how to align with the have’s.

She’d had a knack for making the most amount of money with the least effort possible. She’d mostly made her money as a merchant before, wether it was fashion or food, humans had a tendency to want “the best”, and no matter the century, she knew how to provide. This time she’d surprised herself as she’d taken up computer science and crypto currencies instead. It was easy for her to talk to computers and it was easy for her to see the growth patterns in “computer coins” as the woman she’d adopted to be her grandmother had called them.

In the human world, having enough money always got you certain luxuries. In the past, she’d felt bad about the amount of human labor it took to keep her in comfort, but now, with the machines, almost everything could be done for her.

All she had to do was make sure that there were enough humans running through her fields and homes and businesses to keep the “human touch” there. It was amazing how pleasant humans could be when their jobs were to just be around.

Everything was almost perfect she sighed. As she looked at that stick, waiting for a full three minutes to pass.

Maybe that extra line would disappear.

Maybe this time she, the goddess of fertility had failed. She hadn’t, her whole being knew she hadn’t.

She had high hopes for this era. But the pills and the creams, and sponges, and metal bits, and the tying of the tubes and the attempt to laser them did nothing. Anu was pregnant again.

“Why don’t I just stick to women!” She thought to herself, as she giggled of the reminder of her last love.

Oh yeah, she was the goddess of fertility. It didn’t matter how unfeminine, in the wrong body, or anything else her girlfriends were, if there was a uterus there, soon enough, there would be a baby. But “how?” She always had to ask. Not so much because she didn’t know, but because the story was always interesting. It didn’t matter how. If there wasn’t a female around to work her charm on, Anu worked the charm on herself. Wether she wanted it or not.

Even her grandma had received a whole new “bonus” baby.

She laughed and she smiled.

Babies in 2018 were more fun. Most of them lived, yet they were still celebrated.

She programed her phone to order a cake and balloons for her next gender reveal party. All the other programs attached were on it, Pinterest Boards with the latest ideas, mommy blogs, best of’s everything was already planned. She pressed her hand on her belly and asked the baby for its source of income. “Organic Make-Up” the baby said. And Anu started programing a whole automated business for her new child.

At least she could feed them all she thought to herself, as the humans around her kept multiplying.

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This is my entry to Constrained Writing 18 hosted by @svashta.

Thank you for reading, I enjoy your comments.

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