Crafty cancer

Most people have been affected by cancer in some way or another; Personally or through a friend or family member. Rich, poor, young, old, male female...One never knows when or where it may strike. It's indiscriminate. It sucks.

I lost my mother to cancer. She was 59 years old - Far too young of course. I flew 4,000 to be with her during a ten day course of radiotherapy. I'd go to the hospital and also on the oncology ward, also with cancer. We would colour in, read stories, play games and chat. I did that for six days becoming more friendly with the young girl, meeting her mum also...On the 7th day she wasn't there anymore. She was 6 years old. Far too early to leave the world.

My wife, Faith, lost her father when he was 33 years old. Cancer again. She was 11 at the time and from that point on her mother and Faith struggled to make ends meet financially, and sometimes emotionally. Friends seemed to drift away as often happens, all but a few, and their lives became a constant battle to balance the budget and loss. They're both strong women though and they made it work somehow; Giving up isn't in their make-up.

I met my wife just before she turned 16 and have been around ever since...Life is much better all around now, 32 years later...But cancer wasn't done with us.

Faith's mother was diagnosed with cancer a year ago and has undergone a very invasive surgery, over six months of chemotherapy which almost killed her, and has now been declared clear. She still has three-monthly checks, the last of which was this week, and so far is well on track. Good news. She has challenges to face still however things are pretty good, especially considering the alternatives. We're hoping hte next five years of checks will continue to show up clear.

One of the challenges she faces at them moment, and doctors say probably forever now, is numbness in her hands - A side effect from the chemo apparently. She has lost most of the feeling, all except for the constant pins and needles sensation she experiences most of the time. It affects some of the things she can do although she works around it...Keeping her fingers moving is the key and that's where crafts come in.

My mother in-law has a few different crafts on the go however picked up a new one a short time ago. It's card-making, with embroidered patterns. Above you can see an image showing some of the latest cards she's made together with some of the things required to bring it together. It's fiddly work but good for her hands.

She's been working on some Christmas cards as you can see above; There's a Christmas tree one and an angel one also. The other is generic. Currently she is also making a pile of cards to send to those people who supported her throughout the last year; She's a tough lady but the support of other's can work wonders for a cancer patient who goes through many ups and downs, good and bad days. I think it's a great idea, a handmade card and a few words of thanks.

The cards are quite simple in design. A tri-folded card on which the pattern is embroidered. The pattern is punched out on the central panel of card, tiny pin-pricks, and the embroidering-work is done. You can see this in the image below - The outer patterned side of the card is shown and you can see the pin-holes.

This image shows the back of the pattern and the small pieces of tape that hold things in place until it's complete. Once the embroidery is complete and tied-off the left card panel is flipped over and glued to hide the back of the embroidery. This leaves a bi-fold card with the completed pattern on the cover.

Below is an angel card she just completed on the weekend whilst I was putting up some shelves for her. I posted about that here if you're interested. The angel is embroidered and she's added some little diamond things also.

I don't know what it's like to face cancer, not personally. However I know what it's like to watch someone suffer, waste away and finally pass away. It's unpleasant. For my mum with breast and secondary bone cancer in her back there was a lot of pain leading up to the end, although no pain in the end through copious amounts of morphine. For Faith's dad who suffered Hodgkin's lymphoma there was also pain. Those on the periphery can never really know what it's like for those that suffer unless they have been through it themselves though.

I'm pretty proud of my mother in-law, how she's coped and dealt with her situation. I'm also super-proud of Faith who managed to run our business, manage our household, spend sleepless nights in the hospital and look after her mum at home and generally be super-girl...It's been a terrible year for us to be honest; A dark year, with only brief moments of light...But we are still standing and it's getting brighter.

It has been a revelation how a little crafting has impacted upon my mother in-law's life; Not just through keeping her hands active but also in providing her some focus and an outlet. She attends craft classes with a friend of her's and whilst I imagine we'll soon be swimming in a sea of crafty-things it's ok. There could be worse endings to the story I guess.

Life is flawed; It will never run true or straight and us fallible human's are passengers to some extent. Sure, we can shape life as best we can, design and create it as I often say, however in truth sometimes we are subject to it rather than the other way around. I hope cancer is done with us now however only time will tell. For now we just stand up and face life as it comes, bend it to our will where possible and live it like it's the only one we have.

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Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default

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