Redeemed From the Ashes—Chapter 26—Beset By Two Storm Fronts

The old know what they want; 

the young are sad and bewildered.

Logan Pearsall Smith

Last Words (1933)

Chapter 26

She remained in Carl’s company all afternoon. How could she not? There was so much to say without saying a word. They sat under the bench for hours reminiscing of the day they met, their journey of love together. They walked around the property and down the adjoining road. 

Daylight turned to twilight, the stars twinkled brighter until the whole sky was shrouded in melted silver night. Eventually, they spied someone coming down the lane. Of course, John! They drifted toward the front of the house arm in arm, her temple resting upon his arm.

“John,” Evelyn called out.

“Evelyn? You’re still here.” He stopped short when he saw the both of them connected in such an...intimate way. “What is going on?”

She descended from the rickety porch and touched John’s arm. “John...meet my husband Carl.”

His jaw instantly dropped at the unexpected news.

“Shall we have some tea?” She tried to lead his stiff body up the stairs and into the house.

He nodded.

Once she had settled both men upon some comfortable seating, she relayed to John the whole story of the misunderstandings which had infiltrated their entire lives in the course of the past few months.

“I can hardly believe it!”

“That is what I said to myself when I first heard her delicate voice. Now she is here with me.” Carl reached his hand out to Evelyn. 

She kneeled upon the floor in front of him and brushed her thumb against his gruff cheek. He really must not have had a full grasp of his senses to have let himself forsake his cleanly habits. “I believe, gentlemen, that I really must leave to go to my home. It is getting late.”

“Evelyn, where is your home? I mean...of course, you must have had some place in which to live. Must you really leave me tonight? I just found you.” 

“I regret that...I must. I live with a friend with whom I work. She’ll be wondering where I am.” 

“You work? Where?”

“I will tell you another time.” She kissed the top of his hand as he in turn kissed her hands over and over again. She pulled them from his grasp with some difficulty and bid John goodnight.

“Here let me see you to the door.” John opened the front door and stepped out with her onto the porch.

“John, I know this is a lot to take in. I have told you recently that I am engaged to...another man. I ask you do not tell Carl a thing about the situation.”

“But...”

“Please, I will tell him myself; but I need to think...about this. Do you promise?”

“I promise.”

“Good, please, take care of him, goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” John for the most part of the evening had become mute which was the strangest thing; for he was normally the one who could not keep quiet in company. She didn’t blame him for having been made silent through the fantastic truths which had been told this night. On the way home, she could not utter a word herself.

What am I going to do? Carl doesn’t know about Gerald. Now Gerald doesn’t know about Carl. I am in such a mess. What way out is there?

Throughout the chaos, one thought stood out. She was Carl’s wife. They had been apart for so long. She needed to tell Carl of her deeds and hope he would forgive her; and Gerald...she did not want to let him go. Her heart pulled in both directions threatening to rip her body, mind, and soul apart.

When she arrived home, all the lights were out. She struggled to make up her mind whether she should go to Gerald; for she had told him so in the note. He would have to do without her appearance. She needed to think, to mend. She settled into bed, trying to row away from the storm brewing in her mind.

***

Violent shaking awoke her from her few hours of slumber. For most of the night, her eyes had remained wide open and her mind more awake than ever.

“Evelyn! Where were you last night? I was starting to worry something had happened to you. I would have fetched the police if I did not see you in your bed this morning.”

“Betsie, I’m all right.”

“Come now to the kitchen table and tell me exactly what happened to have made you come so late last night.”

“All right. I’m coming.” She sat down upon her chair, feeling that she was now at a mock police station being inquired about her involvement in some crime.

“What happened?”

“Betsie, I found...him.”

“What are you talking about? Found whom?”

“I found Carl.”

Her mouth was open for a full minute before she could utter one word.“What?” 

“Yes.”

“Where?”

“I found him at John’s place.”

“But I thought you were going to help some man who...Oh.” Her eyes brightened at the enlightening facts; and her lips moved incessantly, but no words came out. “Really? All this time?”

Evelyn nodded.

“How could that be?”

“Before the explosion, when he returned home from the war, Carl was already suffering from...trauma. It must be that the explosion augmented the fragility of his mind to a higher degree. He thought he had lost me. He passed by our old home to see it in ruin. He believed that...there was no hope for him to live a life of happiness. So he stayed in his own shadow never venturing to turn his face toward the sun. He has suffered so much.”

Betsie’s hand covered Evelyn’s. “What are you going to do? Your husband is still alive, but...you are to marry Gerald. Does Gerald know?”

“No, I was supposed to see him last night, but I arrived late. I could not bring myself to see him. I have to make a decision. I need time to think.”

“Of course. I’ll be at the hospital the whole day.”

“All right.”

Once Betsie had left, she meandered to her mirroir and stared at herself. Who was she, really, without either men? Yes, both of them had helped her to become better in different ways. Without them, she was a woman who had changed so much in the span of a few months. She had found good friends who would be her guides throughout her life. She had lost love and then had found it again. She had become more confident in more ways than she could have ever imagined. Hope had been restored. She was now a woman who had faith in something greater than herself. She was herself.

Carl had changed so much and...so little. He was still his gentle self and his strength seemed to have been sapped. His heart had changed. It had become more soft and caring.

Gerald—she had not known for very long but felt as if she had known him all her life. He was her leader, a man in every sense of the word. He stayed true to his convictions and word even during the hardest of times, but he was living a lie.

Both men had captured her heart and set their claims upon it. They both loved her. They both wanted her. Whom could she give the most of her love? Whom could she make the happiest? With whom did she want to spend the rest of her life? With whom could she open her heart to the fullest and let see the deepest part of her soul? Carl or Gerald—Carl would be by her side and revel in the delights she offered; and he in return would show true affection, affection in which she could rest assuredly. Gerald would lead her, comfort her and praise her for her accomplishments; and he would join her in every venture she would want to pursue.