The Daily patriot... The Weekly Steem Round Up....And having some fun.

Here's the weekly round up of events that's caught the eye of the Daily Patriot insipid intrepid reporters.

And this week we are introducing a new format. Video!

Ok, video is NOT a new format, but it is for us , relaying the news, ok?

The video has to be put on hold - I ran out of time. Pesky time.

Here's the headlines of the news program for those who are interested in watching, and also an easy way to drop tagged names for more upvotes.
The newsroom doesn't run on fresh air, ya know..!.
(and if you like the new format, let us know - we'd love to keep it going.)
(The intro is at the bottom of the post - I had to post it!)

COMING UP THIS WEEK, IN THE DAILY PATRIOT STEEM(IT) ROUNDUP.

(In no particular order, so that way you'll have to watch it all the way through - and it might run to two news reports. I've bitten off more than can chew, I think.........)

@whatsup and her PoS (proof of salt) story. While whatsup seems to be wanting more fun on here (and who can blame her? This place is more serious than a libertarian the day before his trial in Stalin's courtroom...)

When I asked her to have lick (to prove I wasn't salty anymore) , she ran away and wouldn't take me up on the offer.

What does a salty free guy have to do, to get a lick around here, uh?

@baah and his/her/it's first appearance, in the Daily Patriot. (It's a mercy mocking)

It seems that anonymous bile is directly correlated to also being a high profile figure in real life, with a very large inferiority complex, and corresponding angry Ego, to compensate. Penis size cannot be speculated on at this point. (but we might do anyway, just for laughs).
Lets make Steem(it) fun again, right, Baaaahzaaaa?

While this profile gives no proof of identity, it has been suggested that his communication style indicates a predilection to masochism, and humiliation. Basically a cock sad individual.
The strategy shown also suggests obtaining pleasure from self inflicted pain, and would indicate the communication skills and depth of a personality commensurate with a poodle, and who has never mingled with other dogs at that.
Even as we report , our intrepid team are trying to find who exactly he/she/it is.
( And also whats in their trash bins, so as to confirm an hypothesis put forward by a leading 'head doctor').
Top psychologist Heinz Beenz, (PHD, MBA , STD, HIV), and author of his new book 'poodles are canines to – they eat dog food '.
He said to our reporters that we shouldn't be surprised to find 'cans of pedigree chum' stuffed in the all the cupboards in the kitchen, of this individual.'
No one from Steem inc. were available for comment, but one anonymous source did say that they would give an off the record interview in exchange for one hour of a 'severe belly rubbing, while uttering 'whos a nice boy?'.

....Due to me running out of time, you'll just have to put up with a short gif instead of the full thing - it's taken from the for the full sound version, you know, the one I haven't finished yet..

@tarazkp. Has he been abducted by aliens? We try to find out...

Concerns continue grow and speculation is rife, about @tarazkp 's and his whereabouts.
Emergency services have been notified of his apparent disappearance.

For two posts now, he's not only NOT mentioned how brilliant Steem is, (worrying in itself) but there's also no mention of any potential, leverage or EVEN a granular feeding .... thing.
His last posts have not been about steem or steemit at all!

It is being assumed at this time that someone, or something, has stolen his keys and is posting, using his account. Patriot Daily is betting on alien abduction.

His family have been notified, but @galenkp was not available for comment, as he was far too busy shooting 'roos.

@paulag A steemians relationship with excel. (it's a spread sheet thingy, not a person).

@Paulag has been trying her best to switch the entire world onto using to excel. At all times - and for everything.

While no one apart from herself has a bloody clue as to what she's on about, she's states unequivocally that 'spreadsheets are a good thing'.

And she's also Irish- so she can get away with saying absolutely anything, and sound very nice in the process.

We tracked down her old haunts, to see if we could find out more (but not in a creepy way).

"she's always been the same" says Niamh Murphy, (pronounced 'Neaaave', for some bizarre reason).

" ....We were off our faces all the time, at the POD in Dublin, back in the mid 90's, and she sat in the chocolate bar working out inputs algorithms– or something.
I remember that our idea of taking 'ex' was totally different than hers, although when she started reading the spread sheets at 2 am in the morning - her eyes were the size of saucers- just like ours!

@mepatriot. Have things taken a turn for the worse for this Steemit user? An Exclusive Report!

@mepatriot continues his down conflict by retaliating with posting the same posts again and again - to piss off the down voters, I would presume.
Well done down voter pisser off-er, I say!....(in a totally non partisan, just reporting the facts , kinda way)
Is this a new and novel strategy to beat the authoritarians?
Very possibly, and we will be keeping a close eye on events as they unfold.

Rumors are circulating that anti vaxxers are now trying to inject his profile name with vaccines, but they're a bit stupid.

Meanwhile, the CPS are talking of coming for his children, due to the the fact he's fighting back, and causing 25% of CPS employees to ask for safe spaces, on a daily basis.
When asked for statement, @mepatriot simply said, " Let 'em try to come and take my kids, one is 33, and the other is 26.'

CPS have refused to comment officially on this apparent problem - but one anonymous source from within the service, has categorically stated ' We know age is a social construct, so his kids are now aged 9 and 7 respectively, as far as we're concerned.
....We''ll soon be seeing him with a child care protection order. No child should have to witness the posts that he does online.. it's nothing but hated filled errr....errrr... hate!....now where's my safe space.?...."

@abigail-dantes. Has she finally lost her marbles? Daily Patriot's has an exclusive interview.

In Europe, @abigail-dantes has been busy looking for new house.
"I'm looking for a detached, colonial style, palace," She said to us, when we went to interview her, " But it has to be very, very small, at the same time."

Mr abigal- dantes, when asked about the couples relocation plans, simply said, "What the hell are you talking about? We're not moving anywhere".

It appears that the miscommunication was entirely due to @abigail- dantes.

Acting as her own 'mind doctor', she explained to us further ....."I'm completely nuts", she said, with maniacal laugh... "I just want to send some plastic Northern European warriors eastwards, in exchange for a house."

She smiled very strangely at that point, and seemed to be looking at nothing in particular, somewhere in the middle distance...
She went on to say, "And my delivery must be on on the back of a whale while a penguin sits on the top of the whale, and does all the navigation. Then all my dreams will have come true!"

We then carefully backed off, away from the property, as quickly as possible.
Yup..... mad as a march hare..
(we wish her well, and we shall be keeping a close eye on her progress...)

@steem. When new technology just isn't enough.

In other news, @steem has sent out emails to all it's users email inbox's.

It has been estimated that of the over 1 million accounts have been opened , (official Steem figures), but nearly 1,000,000 of these, are so called 'sock puppet' accounts –(these are the same users, just with multiple accounts).

The estimated number of actual real users active on steemit over the last 2 years, is estimated to be from 231, to 433.
Steem inc did not reply to our inquiries into finding clarification of 'real' and 'multiple' members, nor to the apparent paradox of the ethos espoused in the Steem ecosystem.

After years of giving the message that, 'block chain is the new technology, it's the new internet, it then seems something of a idiosyncratic action in it's nature, to then use some of the oldest technology on the internet, (email) to communicate with people interested in the revolutionary block chain 'that will make the old internet redundant'.

The communications director did not reply to our questions. (which is standard operating procedure, by all accounts).

PLUS!

A 'Double D'tube special. (well, it would have been if i completed the video).

After a three years long study by UCLA, concerning women's breasts , the results have finally been released, and they discuss their findings with us.

Over 4,000 male student were asked to fondle three different women's breast (not all at the same time), and it was found that 73% of the male participants, found it a pleasurable experience.

Interestingly, 27% of those in the study, were registered as official Social Justice Warriors.

Maybe even more interesting is that all of the three women who were 'the gropee volunteers' in the study, found that that 27% of the men who fondled their breasts, said that 'they squeezed them until it was painful', while at the same time, uttering under their breaths, 'I'm not a misogynist I'm not a misogynist'

So it's official! Men do like feeling women's breasts..... (Well, mostly).

Apologies for this last report on breasts - it worked far better in video...

And here's the Dtube youtube taster...fuckin' hell dtube won't let me upload - tried three times!(You can imagine putting all that ^ material into one video !!!!)
Feel free to tip some BAT, I don't mind one little bit.