DOUBLE STANDARDS - AND HOW THEY MAKE IT HARD FOR NERDS, DWEEBS, & GEEKS
Personally, I’d rather not prefer to refer to others as nerds, dweebs, or geeks, but that’s just the way that the world views some people.
Therefore, when I use those terms, you all have a pretty good idea about whom I’m referring to. Life can be tough enough, but for younger people it can be even more difficult. For school age children up into the 20s and early 30s, different levels of maturity can seriously affect one’s outer appearance, sometimes even for life.
Since we are basically a superficial culture, a lot can be determined based upon looks alone. For the awkward adolescents and pimpled people, life can be a lot more difficult, especially when it comes down to something as complicated as interacting with the opposite gender.
DOUBLE STANDARDS
Basically, a lot of what determines whether certain behavior is appropriate or acceptable is based upon who is the one responsible for the actions and how the recipient perceives the other individual.
What if a tall handsome male is smiling at a young woman who finds him attractive? The smile is not only permissible, it is eagerly welcomed. However, if a skinny kid with acne, thick glasses, and oily hair is smiling at the same young lady, it completely creeps her out and she finds it repulsive. The action is exactly the same, but the reception is completely opposite.
Time and time again it seems that these individuals try to interact appropriately, but unfortunately, there is all too often too high of a double standard for them to overcome. How is it that one individual can talk disrespectfully to members of the opposite gender and have it be allowed when another individual, who just happens to look different, would never be allowed to do so without severe consequences.
In school, some could be suspended or given a detention for the same activity that would help another to get into a relationship with the same girl. Once we age though, it seems that restraining orders or arrests become the end result.
EQUALITY?
Obviously, we all have different standards for our interactions with others. We will often allow close friends to say things to us that would never be received well if a stranger said them to us. However, relationships are different than just appearance.
It’s not that hard to realize who are the outcasts and less appealing individuals in a group or society. Still, they are people too, and their outward appearance is not always a good representation of their true self. I know that when it comes to relationships a physical attraction can help, but I still wanted to use it to illustrate this point.
I think that for far too long far too much focus has been put on physical appearance. Time and time again we find that there are people who have very little control over their physical appearance at different times of their lives. I say that we remember to cut others some slack when it comes to how they look, especially when it is based upon how they were created. Often, people will eventually grow out of it too!
Just because you were born more attractive-looking than someone else does not give you the right to be cruel to them!
I think if we were honest, we may even find that we had some awkward stages ourselves!
FULL STEEM AHEAD!
FOLLOW
There is a thing, a need perhaps, more so in certain countries, to be popular, to be part of the in crowd.
Your reputation is all important in some spheres.
I think this is one of the root causes of this problem. If i had kids (and the kids I don't have are grateful that I don't have them) I would teach them to be themselves no matter what.
Don't try to fit in. Don't try to be like everyone else. Don't try to be popular. don't try to be part of the in crowd.
Be who you are and what you are, and know that other people will hassle you for it, and they will do that because they are too weak to be their own person.
I have always been an outcast, no matter where I have lived. It has turned me into a person that has a happy disposition because I don't need to impress people or try to fit in.
And because of that, I can fit in pretty much anywhere, and be comfortable.
It was a lonely road sometimes, but even if you're part of the crowd, it will be lonely sometimes.
If people call you names, accept it. It's just a name. If someone says "you're blue!" That doesn't make you blue. It just means they can't see colours correctly.
If someone calls you another name, and you don't think it's right, that just shows that they are wrong. Another person's failure is not your problem.
There will always be double standards, but that doesn't mean you have to subscribe to them.
As usual, well said!
On the name part, because good things come in small packages, Trevor is a little on the shorter side. It is easy to tell where people knew him from by what they called him. Shane at home and rellatives, Mouse through collage, Gnome at first job afterwards, Boskerbeltta at tai kwon do a d 2 nd job, the instructor was the boss as well. No doubt some unrepeatable names while overseas, and now he has grown respectibale, Trevor. He is gonna regret getting me into seemit.😁
Interestingly enough, the ones who society deems fit to be called "good looking" are often bullied as well. The abuse stems from others feeling inferior. It's nothing new for someone to see another who just so happens to be "blessed" with good looks and assume they are any number of negative things like conceited or shallow.
Both of my daughters take after their mom. Very beautiful. They've both been bullied because of how they look. They had nothing to do with their appearance. This goes both ways. It's not just the nerds who have it rough.
Excellent point and thanks for sharing! You are very correct, and too often everyone is just mean to everyone!
Here's how I look at it @papa-pepper. Some people are mean to some people. I'll try my best to teach my kids how to handle those situations. The rest of the world is up to everyone else. I don't ever see a world where everyone gets along by default... and I don't think I'm being cynical. Anyway, you have a good day.
Absolutely, people will always tend to be selfish and even cruel by default, so it's our responsibility to train our children to not treat others that way, and not to repay evil for evil either.
My main point was just that we tend to be superficial and treat people differently based upon how they look, even when they are doing the same thing as someone else.
This post has been ranked within the top 10 most undervalued posts in the first half of Feb 09. We estimate that this post is undervalued by $12.61 as compared to a scenario in which every voter had an equal say.
See the full rankings and details in The Daily Tribune: Feb 09 - Part I. You can also read about some of our methodology, data analysis and technical details in our initial post.
If you are the author and would prefer not to receive these comments, simply reply "Stop" to this comment.
what we need to do is to train our children to be tough and to accept reality.
attractiveness and social charm are real things; I spent too much of my own life raging at companies that hired people due to a "comfortable feeling" rather than on the best qualified for the job.
it was a waste of time.
we need to train our kids to be tough and to let rejection and pain slide off their backs so they can focus on the attributes they have that will let them be successful.
Indeed, I know what you are saying! Thanks @stevecoins!
Why are all of your post titles shouting?
I've just always used uppercase letters for my titles... Would you recommend turning down the volume @sneak?
Lol! Some people said that people use CAPS LOCK on their YouTube titles and get more views... So I just stuck with it since I was doing it anyway.
It seems to be working for you. I think I would do what works.