Haffanower: To The Top of the Food Stamps and Reaching New Heights Along the Way
Well hello there! My name is @nonameslefttouse the writer himself. Yes, it's true, there wasn't much of a selection that day. You should bookmark now. You'll find yourself regretting, yourself, ...if you do not. This is not what I'd like to speak about today. This article is going nowhere. Maybe I'll just paint something...
What? That up there? I was just talking about my food. They said "half a nour would be dair," three half an hours ago. I just got a tiny bit bored is all. Did you think it was about those ridiculous clowns? Come on, really? You're scared of a fucking clown? That's old news, my friends.
Do you like clowns? The whole point of a clown is to be misleading and mysterious. Playful yet, deranged.
Have you ever been clowned?
Don't worry, I knew a clown once, they are okay people. I'm not "clownist" and this isn't about "clownism" or "clownmunism" and no... I'm not bitter. Yeah sure, some drink. She drank. Notice how everything is past tense? Do I really need to say what happened? Must we bring up these phantom memories from realms sooner less traveled to?
Even the FBI is afraid of clowns. Did you know, the FBI labelled all Insane Clown Posse fans (Juggalos) "gang members"? That's right, maybe you heard it here first, maybe not. ICP took the FBI to court.
What in thee actual fuck, is that all about?
If you wore their brand or had a "hatchet man" tattoo, the police could be all over you. Just for that. That's worse than clownism. It's worse than the big Tony the Tiger style, "Theirrr RRRRRace," ism... Straight up, disgracism.
What about those who do not wear the clothes, with no tattoos, taking their kids to the store to get chips and a scratch and lose? The only thing left, of course. Paranoia. Assume everyone is an undercover "gang member" out to get you. "Arrest that bitch!"
Is that really the only sort of logical thought process these people can achieve? "Be afraid, be very afraid?" Seems like flawed logic to me, with all that training on top of it. At least they can teach their dogs to sit, sometimes...
Even society is peering into this cave of the unknown worry. Watching terrorism on tv, fearing all that be, missing the true controversy... but soon, they'll see.
Commence Epic Coach Speech
Does the fighter win the match by beating up everyone in their opponents corner?! Does the fighter win by fighting all those who cheer for their opponent?!
No! The fighter wins by working with their team, focusing only on their opponent, ignoring everything else, staying in that moment, trying to achieve some means to an end, and why not call it a victory, my friend. The fighter wins when they have nothing but the fight they're in, forget worry. Stay focused, police, stay focused.
It seems, maybe the police should learn how to fight and the fighters should learn how to police. That way. Focused, highly driven, inspired to be motivated individuals patrol the streets fully trained... and the assholes get the beats in front of the seats.
I'd pay to see that.
If my esteemed followers, and readers worldwide ever get treated like that, I'd sue the FBI too, even if they weren't behind it.
Just for something to do.
I'm not sure if I have my facts straight here, but I believe this classification and the FBI's social experiment eventually came to an end on paper and in the courts. Sure, cops might no longer have the "right" to profile this group in that negative light, demand ID claiming a hairstyle, tattoo, makeup or logo on a shirt as probable cause for the encounter... but yet they still do. All over this great continent, police seem to be fighting the crowd. Why? Flawed logic, clearly. Poor leadership. Too much paranoia. Clouded judgement. I think it's safe to say some of these things given the current state.
Fans of a simple art form, labelled a gang. There are more shoes to fill though, so let's take a walk.
An artist puts hours upon years into their work. You have a right to your freedoms, your fans have a right to their freedoms. The command comes along to forcefully remove your work from your fans hand... "What's this? Is that contraband?" Does that not resonate bland? All artists have one thing in common; the lover of their art. The lover of the art comes from all walks of life. Would you allow the police to take that and quite literally put it in a cage? I'd rage.
Give that man a raise!
Maybe some of you sell tires. Maybe some cops don't like your brand. Cops pull everyone over who uses your brand, some go to jail. How's business lately? Get it?
How many more times in our lives will we all be forced to witness the powers at be, the big heavy hitters, blame art for all of today's problems?
What the hell does one persons talent and the way others gravitate towards it have to do with the state of things to come?
Those in charge are seemingly the only people who don't understand simple concepts like, "Don't take candy from a baby," "Don't take the bible away from Flanders", "Don't poke the bear." Society is really that simple. Yet they have week long meetings, analysts, number munchers, vacations in between, time to drink, panels, graph charts, pie charts, mom's tarts, farts that don't stink... and they STILL can't figure this shit out.
If you stand for personal freedom of any kind, the ICP vs FBI situation is something you should look up, in your future. Apparently, in September of 2017 Juggalos from all over are getting together to peacefully protest a lot of the shit that's going on this world. It should be a colorful event. I just hope those who attend remember the part about focusing.
Don't take on the army of police. Those people are just placement holders, filler. It's those behind the scenes drinking the fine wine behind the cop vine. The final societal blind. It's their mind, their attention you need to find.
Simply avoid their trap... Wait, hold up someone's at the door.
This Better be the Food
Seriously, FBI, I just get a little prickly when I'm hungry, it doesn't mean anything, don't take it personally, I'm not crazy. I saw it on a commercial once, so I thought it was okay to act like that. Please don't shoot. Thanks.
Your friend, me.
While you wait, everyone can have a look-see at this other thing I made while I was waiting for this lost asshole to get here. I haven't decided what it is supposed to represent though. It just, came to me.
KNOCK KNOCK
Who's there?
I am Haffanower, but I have not been named.
You called me, but you will not see my face. That is, unless, you can keep pace.
For a race to see face at this place you must grace!
Open new tab and enter this lab, ask Groogal: The Knowledge Master, keeper of all keys,
sneaker, of all sleeeeze.
Seek Groogal, if you prease...
Find my name or go insane to once you became the pain, once truth, glorious gain!
In circles we go!
See the lead? Did your eyes bleed?
If not, then you... must leave.
Oh, and by the way,
IF you Choose to stay don't give the word away that is the only pay and now You,
may have, a good day.
OKAY!
Whoa! What the fuck are you supposed to be? What happened to that little dude that always comes? He always brings extra soy sauce. I have like forty in the fridge, no wait, maybe fifty. They always fall out and then the cat plays with them and it ends up everywhere. Actually, on second thought, can you hold the soy sauce today? Yeah, just like that, hold it there. Do the duck face thing, yeah, make it sexy. Mind if I take a photo?
D- d- did you just stutter? Are you sure you're reading that right? $2222.50 for this greazy shit and I didn't even say soy sauce? Dude, this isn't even a receipt...
Follow the path of all things bound, this shit will make your head impound the sound of all things found around the ground browned by devastated pound hound for You, the clowned.
Now if you'll pardon me, I must get back to thee, to hear the rest of me.
My Kanye West CD.
I'm high on Kokanee.
I gotta fuckin pee.
This is my OCD.
Cd'z? I think you should go for a walk, man.
There's something odd on the back of that fucktard's receipt: ....
but,
That's about all the time we have for today.Will our hero finish his cold, soy sauce less food and crash out for the night... or will he get to the bottom of this fucked up receipt? Will the FBI smash through the windows? Who the hell was that guy? How the hell did this article turn into this? What the hell just happened? Am I a narrator?
