^{Credit: Jong, my colleague}

Hey, guys! I'm late for the challenge (by 2 days) and I'm technically disqualified, but hey! It's a challenge, not a contest. And I think we could have more "positive" in our lives :P (Rules of this challenge are at the end of the post. Speaking about rules, ...)

One of the rules is that I had to publish a positive thing that happened "today". I had a good post on Monday, and I insist on using this, so today's post cannot be "Day 1." I guess I'll name it "Day 1a" (:P)

I had a very bad mood (especially at work this) past month, and I didn't know what to do with it! I had been doing this partnered gratitude exercise (post here) (Busy.org link here) with my mom, @crazymum, for many months for times like these, but I'm moody as hell right now!

Then I remembered The 3 Positive Things Drill. I reaally love this, because I feel bad when I have the same amount of positive and negative things. This means that for me to start feeling happy again, I just need to notice more positives. The best thing about this technique? You change your entire situation from a negative one to a positive one!

Since I was especially moody today, I decided to do something special in my partnered gratitude exercise: I was gonna change 3 negative things into 9 positive things!


Of course, since this is my journal, it is really personal! So I have edited the names of involved all other people. Are you ready for my uber gratitude entry? You may proceed to read it below! :)

2018 06 04, Mon

I'm a bit moodier. I'm gonna do a special for one or more main points. Gonna flip my negatives.

^{disappearing in bottom left}

1) Negative: AZ came out of the (Malay) prayer room. When I greeted her with a smile as she walked passed me, she gave a very curt and short "morning". She used to greet me warmly. I thought okay, that's fine, she's having an off day...? But immediately after, she cheerfully greeted Missy behind me for like 2 seconds with "Good Morning, Miiiiiiissy!" and similarly with one more colleague further down behind me. I felt so sad and mad.
Positives
a) She's probably feeling more scared with me than mad, and that means it's very reversible if I would just drop my resting bitch face/etc. for longer periods of time.
b) It could be feedback that I could small talk a bit more.
c) It could be feedback that I have let negative emotions uhm, overwhelm my face, so now I can do something about that?

2) Negative:
When HH, my [colleague], came into the pantry after C entered, he and C had some pleasant chat about exercise, about work, and about his "fierce" face - when that happened, I felt sad & mad to think, like I can't be like C to just hit it off so easily with new colleagues and managers and be friends with them, and I felt scared about how my relationship with HH may just be another relationship that doesn't go the way I would like it to. He was friendly & happy with C, but he and I couldn't strike up a conversation.
Positives:
a) This is good coz I'm aware of my feelings for the whole thing, and I could now train myself to be present in the moment and realize that this isn't as big a deal as I'm making it in my head.
b) It's also good coz when we couldn't strike conversation, we were both being scared of each other... Me coz I'm feeling 3 negative emotions at the same time, and the 2 of us being a bit nervous having to interact with each other, strangers, for the first time.
c) I think my positive thinking skills are a bit lazy right now, and not been flexing as much. I'm glad that this situation has now forced me to think more positive about things around. And that this will probably help me be less sad, mad, scared and therefore more approachable with the new staff / the managers at my department.

^{positive entry here! :)}

3) Context: Lunch with C in the pantry. Enjoyed her story about making a mystery novel for her highschool competition. This is good, coz we normally don't have much to say, but today I was definitely able to enjoy this coversation.

_{trophies behind too}

Negative: C won 1st prize for her novel. After our lunch, I felt sad and mad that C seems to have her life laid out so easy (professionally and socially) and I have to work my way up to anywhere around her level, while having to see her every time as a reminder of what I haven't been and what I seem to fail to become every time everywhere.
Positives:
a) This led to a moment of reflection, that I probably have much more success under my belt than I realized. b) This is a reminder of my hard work to climb out of the hell hole of the past very depressed and negative Russell. c) This is a model for me to think about when it's kinda okay to talk about something that might look potentially like showing off. (She told something that she could show off, but she was more invested in conveying the amusement she had in the story she wrote. A good example of not showing off!)

Notes

Doing this exercise, I immediately felt happier. It's amazing!

I know it may be quite ridiculous to think these things. Those were really small things. But recently my work space felt like nothing good was going on for me for months. With neither objects nor people!

Getting mad at people for not greeting you, not speaking to you, or having a better deal in life than you -- all these can seem sooo logical. But sometimes all it takes is a few minutes to notice the many positive things on the flip side of the coin, to help bring everything back into perspective. (And into my happy zone :D)

Man is scientifically and naturally inclined to the negative -- it's for the sake of survival. But for my emotional wellbeing, I suppose I have to just keep working on this exercise, till this positivity mindfulness is drilled into me. Oh, wait. "Drill"? "Me"? That the title of this post! >P<

The Rules

This is the rules section:

Nominations

For this challenge, I will nominate: @crazymum, @justnyz, and @mourningnoodles!

What are the rules of this challenge?

Write a post about something you have to be positive about today - this could be anything from being thankful for your current situation, someone being nice to you, being thankful for your friends and family, or even being thankful for the opportunity you have been given here on Steemit - just keep it positive :)

Do this for 7 days in a row if you get nominated

Mention three people who should do this on each day.

Tag it with #7daypositivitychallenge and include these rules at the bottom of your post
(Tip: You need to put the # in front of 7daypositivitychallenge or it will not let you use the tag.)
Include a picture of something positive (related to your story if possible).

Quick shout out to @littlenewthings for nominating me! You can find the original challenge post here:
"7 Day Positivity Challenge" by @conradt

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