POEM: Shifting the Heavy to Gratitude

Sometimes the best way through a wave of emotion is to write it out, translating the feeling to words and trapping it in a poem. Logic also helps...

I’ve been going through dog withdrawal today. It’s been two years since I had to give up my last one, and though he’s in a great home that meets his needs way better than I could, I still miss having a dog.

Thank you for the video, @rhondak! Your dogs are beautiful.

Rhonda showed me pictures of her Anatolian Shepherd—Anatolians are big, beautiful, fiercely loyal dogs. I wrote this breed into one of my manuscripts, and have dreamed about having one of my own.

I mean, look at that face!

^{This is @rhondak’s photo of her 110lb sweetheart, who you definitely wouldn’t want to mess with.}

Ah, the fun of having a big dog to adventure with… I miss hours of hiking in the bush, outside in nature every day without fail, going at my own pace, my hound and his big booming voice ready to scare off any threats that might come.

I have a whole slew of reasons why having a dog does not fit in my life right now. Let me list them here, just in case I forget and try to rationalize getting a pooch:

• I’m a full-time mom to twin four year old boys.
• Getting said boys to go outside is a struggle, every time.
• I barely have enough time to take care of myself.
• I would have less time to write and play music if I had to devote time to a dog every day.
• Dogs cost money I don’t have to spend right now.
• I want to travel. A LOT.

I could go on, but these are the main reasons I keep reminding myself.

The good thing is that writing this out helps to get me past the yearning and into a place where I’m okay with my life, rather than wishing things were different. I do the dishes, take care of the daily needs of my family, get on with the day to move the sadness out.

Thank goodness for writing. Here, have a poem.

Shifting the Heavy

---

Grief strips away in layers
Loneliness never really leaves
She only takes brief respites
In the relentlessness of life

Yes, it’s good to sit with myself
To be okay on my own
But I long for companionship
That cannot be mine, not now

Bittersweet waves bite gently
I soothe myself with reason
But my mind doesn’t shift
The heavy in my heart

So I’ll breathe, and be
And remind myself over again
To be grateful for what I have
And be happy where I am

Life can be relentless, and it can be easy to wish things were different, but, like @natureofbeing was talking about recently, there’s an art to being grateful for what you have.

I do not need the responsibility of a dog right now, I need as much freedom as I can get. So I’ll live vicariously through those who have pups, write them into my stories, and look forward to the day when my lifestyle adapts to a place where I can once again have my own canine companion.

Until then, I’ll be grateful for my life, just as it is.

And enjoy my Toby cat, of course.

Thanks for reading.

I’ll be donating the proceeds of this post to @tarc to help feed the dogs that @rhondak rescues.

Whatever happens, keep singing your song!

Peace. @katrina-ariel

Photos mine unless otherwise credited.

---

Author bio: Katrina Ariel is an old-soul rebel, musician, tree-hugging yogini, and mama bear to twins. Author of Yoga for Dragon Riders (non-fiction) and Wild Horse Heart (romance), she's another free-spirit swimming in the ocean of Steem.

dragon art: Liiga Smilshkalne

---