Fat. It's fat. Everything is fat. And ash. Punday Monday 88. Comedy Open Mic 46
Welcome to Punday Monday!
New To Punday?
Pull up a stool, order a spiked PUNch, and get to know some of the regulars. I'm your PUNtender, @improv.
How To Make a Pun
This contest is open to everyone. Here's a handy dandy guide on how to make a pun: Learn to Pun
Rules for the PUN-test:
- If you hope to win a prize, your pun must be your original work
- Puns must be relevant to the topic of the week to win a prize, but they can be very loosely related.
Last Week's Punday Monday:
Here is last week's Punday Monday, and all the puns that were eligible to win this week are in the comments!
Hang on to your PUNderwear. The Winners of This Week's PUNday Monday Are...
(GIF by @littlescribe)
Rookie of the Week:
No rookies this week! But grateful to the advanced punners for all your puns!
Pocket Choice Awards:
Every Friday, I put up a post to solicit audience favorites! They can vote on their favorites by sending POCKET to whomever they want to win. This week’s post is here: https://steemit.com/pocket/@improv/3nkyc6-pocket-friday
@richatvns, we’ll give this one that would otherwise be a tie to you under the presumption that @paul.atreides will give @mustang88 a small amount of Pocket that they will then vote with and that @steeminati will correct their send command syntax typo (and that the pocket bots will start working again).
POCKET Choice Winner's Circle Season One:
@aloha-creations, @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.
POCKET Choice Winners' Circle Season Two:
@ablaze, @coinsandchains, @dollarsandsense, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @jk6276, @acolucky, @deceth, @richatvns
Grand Prize (which isn’t bigger than the other prizes, just grander):
Best Pun
Best Pun of the Entire Week
Best Overall Pun
DRUMROLL PLEASE.....
Oh, man, this is tough, really love the old-timers’ puns, @acolucky and @paul.atreides, but these new punsters come with such hustle, too. Ugh, this is tough. I think I have to give it to...
@paul.atreides, for “I can’t sleep because you’re Sonoran!”
And What Prizes Do They Win, You Ask?
Full Strength, 100% Upvote!
Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions from @improv. This week they also got votes from @freewritehouse! They will next week, too! Together, these upvotes could total in excess of five whole cents!
SBI
Which are little bitty upvotes on all your content forever. See @steembasicincome for details. I’ll send one to all of our qualified entrants this week!
Our entrants were:
@richatvns, @payoutbot, @acolucky, @paul.atreides
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Our winners get bonus prize SBI for winning!
Congrats, @richatvns, @paul.atreides
Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post a fully powered upvote and a @tipu tip!
This Week's Pun Topic Is:
Mardi Gras (It’s soon, folks)
As in,
The caddies gather every year in NOLA, much to the chagrin of wealthy golfers who, during Carnevale, must do without their Par Aides.
I'm So Good at Puns
If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!
@comedyopenmic nomination:
Who do I nominate for @comedyopenmic’s comedy challenge? I nominate the winners! This past week’s winners were:
@richatvns and @paul.atreides!
Sponsors, related content, prizes, and money
Sponsors!
@improv/ @freewritehouse
I mean, am I a sponsor of my own contest? Yes? I guess? Also, because I’m involved in @freewritehouse and they’ve/we’ve hosted Punday Monday events over on that page, I’d like to suggest that they (we) are also a sponsor! Regardless, check out the @freewritehouse community! Furthermore, they/we’re using their SP to upvote your puns!
@curie!
We are one of Curie’s chosen communities! Prizes have doubled in season 2, thanks to @curie’s sponsorship! Curie curators do tremendous work making sure unrecognized authors of quality content get recognized and rewarded! They do great work sifting through the heaps of posts to find the undiscovered gems.
Related Content:
- Punday Monday Year One-Day contest results HERE
- @freewritehouse offers writing and word-smithing contests every week
- @steembasicincome has a contest round-up (that includes us) where you can find more opportunities to win SBI.
- @contestkings features our contest and MORE!
Outside referrals that benefit me.
Coinbase:
Cryptocurrency investment wallet Join HERE and we’ll both get $10 of BTC
- Hot tip, I buy BTC on pro.coinbase.com, then send it to bittrex to trade for Steem and send steem to my wallet here. It’s the most efficient way with the fewest fees I’ve found. If you’ve found better, let me know. - I learned from someone else that buying LTC and sending it to bittrex then trading it for BTC then trading that for STEEM is the least-fees way. Can someone confirm?
Robinhood:
Investment platform buying/selling stocks Join HERE and we’ll both get a share of a stock (probably worth ~$4)
Earn.com:
Small tasks for small rewards. Need a business or .edu email, Join HERE and we’ll both get $1 of BTC
Mannabase:
Sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency Join HERE
Swift:
Yet another attempt at a UBI Join HERE
Swell:
If you’re interested in more traditional investing, Swell invests in stocks that have a positive social impact according to their standards, and has a referral program whereby they’ll match your first $50 investment. CLICK HERE for company website.
My ex-girlfriend from 10 years ago used to go home to Rio to star as a center piece in one of the samba groups in Carnival, Which is the same as Mardi Gras only bigger and better here's her picture there:
So this pun is a real story from my past. She was inseparable from her little sister Valeria, and older brother Ashford because they emigrated to the United States together. Th
The day came that her little sister went away to college. About 100 miles from home. Even though her older brother was around, I could tell she missed her sister. But, she was having a tough enough time even to getting to acting Jobs and photo shots because she was car-less. So could not get free time to go see her even on her birthday. Especially because it fell mid-week that year.
So I hatched an surprise to cheer her up, but I needed her brother to cover for me. I was going give her my old SL500 and sister at a surprise shindig.
So I said to Ash, Wednesday she's getting a Car and Val Party!
That's actually a true story (except some names were changed)
But not the picture!
Win some money, Participate in:
Btw .... thaank u, thank yu, taank you, thanc uoo, ty,
for the Preys....
Ets nyce 2 b re-warted....
Ecpesulley b-klaus eye m terry E able width grand mar and spell linking!
Mi auto chex is off.
Can you tell?
!sbi status
I've read about the Carnival in Brazil, it sounds like it is a RIO good time!
We're upvoting puns! Have you checked us out yet? We're hosting freewrites and rewarding readers!
We're upvoting puns! Have you checked us out yet? We're hosting freewrites and rewarding readers!
I am becoming old and fat.
I am coming to terms with it.
I realize that I can no longer be (New Or lean)s.
We're upvoting puns! Have you checked us out yet? We're hosting freewrites and rewarding readers!
Yippee!, I finally have a second post so I can collect the prestigous Punday Monday prize:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@paul.atreides/5-minute-freewrite-friday-prompt-deep-space
Look at you go! What took you so long!?
Posted using Partiko Android
Thank you so much for participating in the Partiko Delegation Plan Round 1! We really appreciate your support! As part of the delegation benefits, we just gave you a 3.00% upvote! Together, let’s change the world!
This post has received a 3.13 % upvote from @drotto thanks to: @sbi-booster.
Congratulations! This post has been upvoted from the communal account, @minnowsupport, by improv from the Minnow Support Project. It's a witness project run by aggroed, ausbitbank, teamsteem, someguy123, neoxian, followbtcnews, and netuoso. The goal is to help Steemit grow by supporting Minnows. Please find us at the Peace, Abundance, and Liberty Network (PALnet) Discord Channel. It's a completely public and open space to all members of the Steemit community who voluntarily choose to be there.
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