不合时宜的劝说
我们和别人相处的时候，要注意自己的言行，不要因为自己随意说话影响了别人的生活和工作。别人不方便的时候，别人很忙的时候，别人生病的时候，别人心情不好的时候，我们都不要去打扰别人，以免增加别人的烦恼。
《弟子规》也提倡：“人不闲，勿事搅。人不安，勿话扰。”
别人很忙，没有时间的时候，我们不要去打扰。别人心情不好、身体不好的时候，我们不要说一些闲话去增加他的烦恼。
《弟子规》提出，与人相处，我们应该随时随地注意自己的言行不要影响到别人的正常生活与工作，这是一种做人的美德。
如果我们总是以自我为中心来考虑问题，不能替对方着想，譬如说我们要找人帮忙（办事或谈话），不看对方是不是方便就贸然打扰，虽然对方往往碍于情面，不好意思拒绝，但是在心里已经对我们形成很不好的印象了，在以后的相处中就会对我们敬而远之。
我们要在平时的生活点滴中学会观察，不等别人说，我们就要能看出他需要什么、不需要什么。纵使是再近的亲人，进退之间，我们也要站在对方的感受上设想，这样大家自然就可以相处得很融洽了。
“人不闲，勿事搅。人不安，勿话扰。”我们对别人的仁爱之心，应该体现在各种行动上，而不是经常挂在嘴上，我们对别人好不是说说而已，而是遇到事情的时候，我们要懂得从别人的角度出发，多为别人考虑，不要做出让别人为难的事情。如果和别人相处得不好，我们要多从自身出发，考虑自己哪里做错了，改正过来。
三国时期，魏明帝因为自己的女儿死了，心情非常不好，很悲伤，他决定好好安葬自己的女儿，并且亲自去送丧。朝中的大臣杨阜听说了这件事情，对魏明帝说，他这样的行为很不妥当，因为先皇和太后去世的时候，他并没有亲自去墓地。魏明帝也觉得杨阜说的话很有道理，但是当时自己的心情非常不好，他真的不愿意听见杨阜一直和自己唠叨这件事情，就把杨阜赶出了朝廷，杨阜不合时宜的劝说，得到了不好的下场。
很多时候，我们看见自己的亲人或朋友心情不好都会很着急，想要帮助他们快些走出困境，所以我们总是急切地去表达我们的关心。但是我们应该明白：那样的时候，可能我们的亲人需要自己单独思考，我们可以给他们倒上一杯热水，给他们一个安静的空间，让他们自己好好地去思考自己的事情。关心别人是要讲究方法的，我们要多站在别人的角度思考问题、看事情，要懂得换位思考。
总之，我们要做善于观察的人，不要轻易去打扰别人。有时候我们想和别人说话，但是要看看别人有没有时间和心情和我们说话。我们说话之前，更要想想，我们要说的话是不是应该说的话。如果我们要说的话对别人是一种打扰，而且和别人并没有关系，那我们就可以选择不说话，及时地去克制自己。
我们有时候可能会想和自己亲近的人去分享喜悦，这就更要选择合适的时机，不能在别人觉得很烦的时候，硬是和他说自己的开心事，这样会让他觉得更烦。我们待人接物，与人相处，要懂得最起码的礼仪。只有我们让别人觉得快乐了，别人才会愿意和我们相处，愿意和我们做非常好的朋友，这样我们的人生才是幸福的。
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English translation Webopt:
When we get along with others, we should pay attention to our words and actions, and do not let our casual talk affect other people's lives and work. We should not disturb others when they are inconvenient, when they are busy, when they are sick, or when they are in a bad mood, so as not to add to their worries.
The Disciple's Rule also advocates, "If people are not idle, do not disturb them. When people are restless, do not disturb them with your words."
We should not disturb others when they are very busy and have no time. When someone is in a bad mood or in bad health, we should not add to his worries by making idle remarks.
The Disciple's Rule suggests that it is a virtue of being a human being to have a good relationship with others, and we should always be careful that our words and actions do not interfere with the normal life and work of others.
If we are always self-centered and can't think about the other person, for example, if we want to ask for help (to do an errand or talk), we will disturb the other person without seeing if it is convenient for them.
We must learn to observe in the usual life, not waiting for others to say, we must be able to see what he needs, what he does not need. Even if they are close relatives, in and out, we have to stand in each other's feelings to envision, so that we can naturally get along very well.
"People are not idle, do not stir things up. If people are restless, don't disturb them with your words." Our kindness to others should be reflected in various actions, not often hanging on the mouth, we are good to others is not just talk, but when we encounter things, we should know how to start from the perspective of others, more consideration for others, do not make things difficult for others. If we don't get along well with others, we have to start more from ourselves, consider where we have done wrong and correct it.
During the Three Kingdoms period, Emperor Ming of Wei was in a very bad mood and sad because his daughter had died. He decided to bury his daughter properly and went to mourn personally. Yang Fu, a minister in the court, heard about this and said to Emperor Wei Ming that it was very improper for him to act in this way because he did not personally go to the cemetery when the late Emperor and Empress Dowager died. Emperor Wei Ming also felt that what Yang Fu said made sense, but at that time he was in a very bad mood, and he really didn't want to hear Yang Fu keep nagging himself about this matter, so he threw Yang Fu out of the court, and Yang Fu's ill-timed persuasion got a bad end.
Very often, when we see our loved ones or friends in a bad mood, we are very anxious to help them get out of the situation quickly, so we are always eager to express our concern. But we should understand at that time, our loved ones may need to think alone, we can pour them a cup of hot water, give them a quiet space, let them think about their own things. Caring for others is a matter of method. We need to think and see things from other people's point of view, and we need to know how to think differently.
In short, we have to be good observers and not to bother others easily. Sometimes we want to talk to others, but to see if others have the time and mood to talk to us. Before we speak, we should think more about whether what we are going to say is what we should say. If what we are going to say is a disturbance to others, and does not relate to others, then we can choose not to speak and restrain ourselves in time.
We may sometimes want to share the joy with people close to us, which is even more important to choose the right time, not when others feel very annoyed, hard to talk to him about their happy things, which will make him feel more annoyed. We treat people and have a good relationship with them, we have to know the minimum etiquette. Only if we make others feel happy, others will be willing to get along with us and willing to be very good friends with us, so that our life will be happy.