You are so right .... it is hard to stay in that state. It takes a lot of work. And yes ..... their actions and thoughts (and moods) are not yours. How they are behaving is coming from within them and relates back to some drama, trauma or incident of the past that they are continuing to play out. It's only how YOU interrupt it and what you tell yourself from their actions and behavior. Are you familiar with Panache Desai? Google him . Enlightening!