Still haven't figured out how to retrieve my steemit password so I have the potential to create a new account and start my journey again!
Currently I am waiting on my travel visa in Australia where I am stuck in limbo.
On the travel Visa you are not "legally" allowed to work so I am looking for anything online to sustain a life here while I can figure out what is next on the map.
I love this country and it has become my home... The anxiety of trying to stay here and maintain a life while working out ways to get permanent residency is insane.
I have so much gratitude for being Canadian citizen where it is much easier to travel the world, obtain visas and find good work as a native english speaker. It is hard here in Australia... but I feel humbled thinking about the struggle of others trying to make it here, escaping terrible economic states, war and pollution.
Damn this world is wild and scary.
Oddly enough I am dealing with a great big hole of depression which I go through every once and awhile.
The weight of the world keeps dropping on my shoulders.
How can I support my parents?
How can I support my brothers and sisters?
How do I support the children in my family?
How do I continue to work for a system that is making us all sick?
Depleting the energies from our beautiful loving planet. Poisoning the thing that makes me happiest?
When I get lost in her forests, dive into her oceans, run into her fields, reach the top of the mountains. I find peace there.
I want to feel safe in the moment.
I have this strong healthy body, on good days my spirit is high but my home is here in Australia and here I am, in the waiting line. Waiting for one single email to tell me : This country is yours for another 12 months while you can conjure up the next plan to stay a bit longer.
I have reoccurring dreams where I don't have any choice but to return to Canada, or go back to high school. I am broke, and only just getting by, forced to move back into these putrid lifeless cities; gobbling up souls and spewing out consumers who are trapped in a cycle of death and disease.
That is my nightmare. My biggest fear. Not enjoying the present moment where I should be. Where I am happiest.
Meditation helps, but I have to do something more.
Today I want to share Mantras that I have been integrating into my my daily thought patterns; I want to see all #steemians reach their goals through their writing, art, thoughts and actions. To educate ourselves on health, wealth and freedom from financial, mental, physical burdens of pain we suffer in the world. Somehow these mantras reassure me that we are not of this body and we can create a better world beginning with a single thought.
I am health
I am wealth
I am beauty
I am happy
I am peace
and like all things : This too shall pass.