⚰️ Frankenbread Man...From Outer Space! 🚀

robyneggs (66)in #writing • 9 years ago

A Halloween themed 'Choose Your Adventure' short, sci-fi, fairy-tale.

Rated PG. Follow along as the Frankenbread Man explores different obsessions over human intricacy. This original sci-fi, fairy-tale classic lets you choose which way the story ends. It’s just a little Halloween short story that can be either scary, funny, or have a classically happy ending…you decide!

Frankenbread Man…From Outer Space

Installment 2

The beginnings and midsection

Section 1 - The Beginnings

PH 1. The Frankenbread Man had always had a soft spot for

A) crème (go to PH 2) B) little girls (go to PH 3) or scarecrows (go to PH 4).

PH 2. Crème. It filled the Frankenbread Man’s heart with that warm and fuzzy feeling.

He loved to smear it all over his body and shove some of it in his mouth. The taste of it. The smell of it. The texture. It ignited his mind and made his brain all tingly. When the Frankenbread Man had crème in his hand, he was a happy man. But only so much crème could the Frankenbread Man have, before it began to taste like sour finger nuts. If ever there was a soft spot, it was crème and it was only when he was out. The beautiful thing that the Frankenbread Man loved was inside every common human’s house.

It was the humans that fascinated him. Their sense of their own reality delighted him. He was ever curious. He had passed this planet but never stopped. This time he was on a pleasure cruise vacation spaceline, when he decided to drop off for some tea. Using his inflatable jet intertube, he floated down into Earth’s atmosphere, in search of crème. Should the Frankenbread Man A) stop by the closest eatery (PH 5) B) find the source (PH 6) or C) land and ask the first human he sees (PH 7)?

PH 3. Little, human girls.

From all the media he had experienced across the galaxy he knew their curious minds had no end. Their little tea parties and dress-up worlds made him wonder what force lay inside their inner workings. What drove little girls to act and think in such a ridiculous manner? He simply could not fathom their fantastical motivations. And how were they considered a legitimate part of society? They had no real fruition from their play and imagination outside their apparent “cuteness”. Cuteness, he sighed. Ugh!

What will the Frankenbread Man do to witness their analytical thought processes for himself? He caught the next jetboat out from Nebula 8 and used his inflatable jet intertube to propel his way into Earth’s atmosphere, unnoticed. He hopes to find a little girl and discover the fortitude of their ability to embrace such a dreaming and unfulfilled life. Such a life without purpose would surely drive him to madness. It was his only weakness. He could not dwell on his own cuteness. He was not cute. No was to call him such. For that was the trait of little girls, and he had always wondered at the comparison. Should the Frankenbread Man A) find the nearest little girl (PH 8) B) hide in a bush and wait for a little girl to come to him (PH 9) or C) go pick one up from the nearest nursery (PH 10)?

PH 4. Scarecrows.

They had always fascinated the Frankenbread Man. He was wrought with the purpose of them. The idea of stuffing hay and clothing it in the likeness of its human self was outrageous. Like a pet. The Frankenbread Man understood pets. Companions, lovable servants. But scarecrows? The tales of them had his curiosity piqued.

There were many tales aboard the S.S. Candyland, but his favorite still remained the scarecrow. Other humanized idols made sense to him. A Jesus, a prophet come to tell a message to His people, he understood the humans need to attribute happenings to a higher force. They had psychological needs, rather like their pets. Desires to personify themselves in many ways made sense to the Frankenbread Man, but not the stuffing of the straw, left outside to rot. Should the Frankenbread Man A) Find the nearest field (PH 11) B) seek their lore (PH 12), or C) observe a human with a scarecrow (PH 13)?

Section 2 - The Midsection

PH 5. Frankenbread Man stops by the nearest eatery.

He hasn’t tasted crème since the last donut he ate on the throughway from Sector 11 to Sector 4. He lands his jet intertube lightly. He hits the button to deflate and compact it, and begins to walk across the lot. His feet are the height of mailboxes, painted up with baby blue frosting lines, arching perfectly. Expect for one thing. Part of his left foot is darker than the other. It looks like it was soaked in motor oil. The smell starts to eek out as the Frankenbread Man walks across the parking lot towards the burger joint. The first human to see him remarked, you smell just like you look. His gumdrops were pieced together from different colors and sizes. His eyes were borrowed from a Swedish Fish and his lips from hardened milkduds. The Frankenbread Man was horrific to see.

He stomped through the door, kicking the frame out to the sides with his super-human strength. His skin was like oozing molasses, alive with movement, yet smelling of mold and decay. The customers began screaming with terror as he made his way to the counter. “I hear you humans have the best crème,” Frankenbread Man remarks. “I am here for your crème. Give it to me!” The man behind the counter begins to scream, “He’s real! He’s really, really real!!” Would you like Frankenbread Man to A) have a happy ending (PH 14) B) have a scary ending (PH 15) or C) have a funny ending (PH 16)?

PH 6. The source of human crème was ever a fascination for the Frankenbread Man.

He had always wondered at the making of it. It was in all the favorite human food and drink – coffee with crème, pastries, hot cocoa…If only he could find the source of the crème, he would be satisfied for the rest of his life. He could enslave the humans and demand they make him crème, over and over again. He could visit Earth every week, to make sure he had his fill of it – it would be guaranteed! And it wouldn’t be like the cheap crème prefabrications aboard the common spacelines – it would be real human made crème!

Finding the source would only be a matter of time…As the Frankenbread Man entered the atmosphere, he began to analyze the layout, growing beneath him. Cities splayed out across sections of dark and light. It was night, here in the Western hemisphere. He guided his jet intertube towards the thickest gathering of lights. Buildings began to take shape, and he thought to himself, it will be the biggest one – the one that produces the most smoke, the cylinder shaped one. And so he landed, in the heart of Portland, next to the Made in Oregon sign, just off the river.

Waterhouses loomed out of the darkness, up on their stilts. He quietly inserted a tap…but it was not crème he found…The towers began to leak, as he went from one to the other, his hope beginning to dwindle and his anger rising to the surface. Where do these humans make their crème at, he wondered? Looking around he spied many buildings that looked suspicious, but he knew that he would have wait in observation of the human’s daily activities before he discern the exact location…He wandered out into the night, towards the fields of empty grass, past animals, asleep in the pasture…He began to tire, and lay in rest beside a tributary. He would peek in at the nearest human house, not far away, when morning came and he knew they would be stirring, drinking their crème with their coffee…Would you like Frankenbread man to A) have a happy ending (PH 17) B) have a scary ending (PH 18) or C) have a funny ending (PH 19)?

PH 7. Frankenbread Man lands and asks the first human he sees, “Where is the crème?”

Naturally they run away screaming, for the Frankenbread Man is horrifying. His molasses skin is oozing and bubbling, like hot lava. Bits of it are boiling and bursting, leaving drips and drops sizzling on the highway and on the poor, unlucky human’s face as they run away screaming. The Frankenbread Man has no regrets. He is here for the crème and so he shall ask another wayfaring human. “Where is the crème?” he yells. Humans are scurrying everywhere, out of his path and he is confused…certainly they have a leader who can sort all this out?

As the Frankenbread man stalks the streets, screaming back in fury and demanding to be shown the crème, a band of community soldiers unite in plots against him. One lone girl child protests – how about we give him some crème? She declares reason in the face of looming battle. She goes to fetch her crème from the fridge. “I know where there’s more,” she offers the scary man from outer space, “Just follow me.” The soldiers come out from around the waystation to meet their alien enemy with pitchforks rising, but alas, he is gone…Would you like Frankenbread man to A) have a happy ending (PH 20) B) have a scary ending (PH 21) or C) have a funny ending (PH 22)?

PH 8. Frankenbread Man finds the nearest little girl.

“You!?” He picks her up and examines her. Shrieks of terror erupt from the crowd. “What is that!?” the humans shout. “What is your purpose little girl?” the horrifying blob of molasses mumbles. “I thought gingerbread men were supposed to be nice,” the little girl states in frozen disbelief. “Nice…cute...funny perhaps?” replies Frankenbread, shaking a little with rage. I came a long way, across many galaxies, to find what makes little girls cute, he tells her. Others call me cute, but I can find no comparison he states as he gently lowers her back down to the ground.

The little girl is swept from his arms as the Frankenbread Man suddenly finds himself surrounded. “You’re coming with us!” …”Nooooo!” the Frankenbread Man shouts! “You cannot conquer me - my powers are greater than yours!” The Frankenbread Man throws his shoulders back and his head up. His fists are chest-level as he summons all of his alien molasses power. His arm swings out and pools of molasses begin shooting in all directions. Like waves they overtake and flood the area. Before long, a molasses river flows down the highway… A) have a happy ending (PH 23) B) have a scary ending (PH 24) or C) have a funny ending (PH 25)?

PH 9. The Frankenbread Man hides in a little bush, awaiting a little girl.

He has landed the jet intertube safely, defragmented it, and folded it away into his belt. Not thinking of what a horrible sight he might appear to his objective, he rests assured that he will soon accomplish one of his life missions. These little girls have him so fascinated. Why? Why would anyone compare him such a bizarre thing? Surely this cuteness had no factor in his own existence. What was it that drove the other Christmas cookie aliens to say such a thing of him? He was not cute, not like little human girls, and he was about to prove it.

Suddenly, a little girl passed by, shoot! He wasn’t watching! And now she was joined by her Mother it seemed, bent over her in consultation. Soon, she skipped away, towards the play equipment, where the other little girls lingered. How was he to lure them over to his bush? He saw them interacting with the play structure, but upon further notice he realized there were tiny sized human replications in some of their arms. That’s it! They play out their motivations using tiny replicas of themselves! Now the Frankenbread Man knew what he had to do. He summoned all of his magical skills and began oozing out a small replica of a human girl from his pliable, molasses alien skin. Would you like Frankenbread Man to A) have a happy ending (PH 26) B) have a scary ending (PH 27) or C) have a funny ending (PH 28)?

PH 10. Frankenbread Man seeks a little girl at the nearest nursery.

But where to find a nursery? As Frankenbread Man tucks his jet intertube pack away, he thinks of where he would keep a nursery if he were an Earth Mother. He scans the land. It seems he is resting on the roof of one of many tall buildings, in a vast expanse of human habitat. None of the buildings stood out to him. Perhaps it was the cutest building? How would he know little girls were being raised in there? He spied one of the smaller buildings, surrounded by a play-yard. This must be it, he thinks.

So he climbs down, and makes his way towards the nursery. Soon, he thinks to himself, soon I will know the secret of their cuteness? What purpose could it possibly have? He oh so wished to know, that Frankenbread Man did. He bent down to observe through the window, which he thought would remain unnoticed. The first thing that happened, however, was that he was spotted and screamed at! The Mother inside started screaming and screaming with terror. She ushered the human children out of the room and he thought he better leave before he was set upon. So the Frankenbread Man tried again, a different play-yard building this time. Oh how was he ever to unlock the secret of little girls and their mamby-pamby cuteness which served no apparent purpose?? Would you like Frankenbread Man to A) have a happy ending (PH 29) B) have a scary ending (PH 30) or C) have a funny ending (PH 31)?

PH 11. Frankenbread Man finds the nearest field.

He has landed on Earth using his inflatable, high-tech, jet intertube. Luckily no one has spotted him. Ah to be alone in this field of Earth for minute, he thinks to himself. Now to find a scarecrow of legend. Not too far along, considering the Frankenbread Man takes giant steps, he sees a figure, poking up out of the grass. Coming closer he finds it. The field gave way to neat, little rows of human food. And there, lo and behold, rested a scarecrow!

At long last the Frankenbread Man has before him the chance to reveal secrets! He begins to unravel the jacket of the scarecrow man. Then he has a realization. Maybe it’s not what is inside that counts, but what is on the outside. And so he replaces the cloth as best he can and ambles off into the row of bushes to the left. Would you like Frankenbread Man to A) have a happy ending (PH 32) B) have a scary ending (PH 33) or C) have a funny ending (PH 34)?

PH 12. The Frankenbread Man wishes to seek the lore of the human scarecrow.

He is on a pleasure cruise, after all. This would be the perfect stop-off opportunity to make a new story for his blog. So he jettisons his jet intertube and heads for the Earth, not too far off of the established cruise line route. As he enters the atmosphere he wonders how he will go about finding a scarecrow keeper. He might have to spend a few Earth years to find out all he wished to know. But he was willing. This was an excellent chance to put his long time wondering to rest.

This human idolization in the season of Autumn fascinated him. Why such an act when the straw merely disintegrated and the birds were never scared away? He must know. He landed in what appeared to have the most colorful of trees. Hoping he was in the right season, he found a cluster of human homes, surrounded by fields of human food. It was here he began to stake a hideout, not far away in the cover of some woods. At night he would enter the village and listen in at the windowsills, in hopes of overhearing something to do with the lore of the scarecrow. Would you like Frankenbread Man to A) have a happy ending (PH 35) B) have a scary ending (PH 36) or C) have a funny ending (PH 37)?

PH 13. The Frankenbread Man sought to observe a human interacting with a scarecrow.

Then he would truly know what made them tick. He aimed to be present for their interaction and to see for himself the love humans gave to this straw idol. In observation, he imagined the human would take delicate care to dress the difficult straw to look just like itself. Perhaps this would be different from any other ritual idolization. He knew how the humans prayed to their Jesus and their Buddha, but that was all comparable to the attribution of a higher power. In this scarecrow worship, he saw manifestations of the inner human desire, and that intrigued him.

It was evening when the Frankenbread Man landed in what he hoped what the best location for finding these human-like scarecrows. According to his nava-computer, the Fall season would arrive here in the next 24-72 hours. He located a sizeable town, near a human food source, and established an underground base in their lower sewer system. He paid close attention, in his nightly patrols, to find and observe the hay as it was being cut and baled. He carefully tracked it from farm to farm, as it was distributed over the area. In wait, he hoped that soon a human would begin the scarecrow process. It was within a few days, he began to see one human set aside a bale of hay, near their patch of food. He was just sure it was meant for a scarecrow. Would you like Frankenbread Man to A) have a happy ending (PH 38) B) have a scary ending (PH 39) or C) have a funny ending (PH 40)?

Look for the next installment, coming soon!

Pick your choice and come back for more...the Frankenbread Man has only just begun to wreck havoc across the month of October...and boy does he stink!

Welcoming Artist(s)

If you would like to illustrate "Frankenbread Man...From Outer Space!" please contact me for more information. 10 SBD reward included. Sample art expected.

*Written by Robyn Eggs, especially for Steemit.com. Copyright October 18th, 2017. All Rights Reserved. Not for reproduction or republication. Robyn Eggs and Toast Publishing. For inquiries, or permissions, please email: robyneggsandtoast at gmail.com.