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RE: Tips for Fic Part 1: The Writer’s Guide to Getting some Action

in #writing8 years ago

If they are:

  1. Handsome
  2. Office job
  3. Work

You’re going to have a bored reader.

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. 99 words:

Harold sighed into his hands. Between his fingers, he saw the spreadsheet open on the monitor before him; the same senseless grid of numbers he had been prying over for hours. But the only way the numbers worked is if someone had been "misplacing" money for the last year.

A lot of money.

He felt a pat on his shoulders. “Still at it, Har?” The hand lingered.

“This is bad, Paula,” he said to the brunette. “The company can’t survive this.”

“Oh, come now. It can't be that bad.” Her speech slowed. “Why don’t you try taking a break?”

Sort:  

You failed! You told us much more:
He's upset
Someone is embezzling
The company is likely to fail

And all without TELLING us any of that!
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