Whole30 - Day 25 - Making Friends with the Middle
Whole30, Day 25, Friday 1/26/2017
Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?
That depends a good deal on where you want to get to, said the Cat.
I don't much care where, said Alice.
Then it doesn't matter which way you go, said the Cat.
So long as I get SOMEWHERE, Alice added as an explanation.
Oh, you're sure to do that, said the Cat. If you only walk long enough.
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
This is day 25 of my 30 days on the Whole30, a month-long cleanse during which you eat no grains, baked goods, sugar, beans, or alcohol. I've been writing posts about this experience since I started this in early January. Links supplied below.
Today for my topic I'd like to look at the art of incompleteness. The beautiful, quirky, inexplicable, and delightful state of being in the middle.
Blueberries and sweet dreams
Here I am on day 25, way past the honeymoon phase. This Whole30 thing is no longer new and fresh. The happy surprises--like the health benefits I did not expect, or the fact that mixing cauliflower, blueberries and butternut puree makes a mighty fine breakfast feast--all these things are old hat by now. I don't expect many more momentous revelations this late in the game. It looks like we are past the wow. So, what should I do now, just mark time until I get to the end?
Almost....where?
When I started writing this post, I was referring to this state I find myself in as "not done." But that language—calling it by what it is not—is part of the problem. Not only do we not know how to be in process, but we stumble over what to call it. If we are Starting or Stopping, Beginning or Ending, we know where we are, and we are a little more comfortable. But if we are in the middle somewhere, mid-process, we can feel a little uneasy. It is undefined, harder to explain. It might call down upon us someone's else's judgment because we are not as far along as they are, or we aren't as far as they think we should be, or we didn't do it right. In some cases, we don't even need someone else to judge us, we can accomplish that quite handily ourselves.
Middle middle middle
Finding myself neither at the beginning nor the end but in the middle of this process, I have a lovely opportunity to get it right this time. To not run full tilt toward the finish line if being in the middle somewhere feels like the right place to be. Beginnings and Endings are fleeting. Being somewhere in the middle is the real deal, the place we live most of our lives. Maybe we can do more than just look forward or backward. Maybe we can look around a little and get comfortable with being exactly where we are.
I have been noodling more and more frantically about what to do when I get to the end of the 30 days. Keep these food restrictions long term since my body seems so happy with them? Keep some and get rid of others? Throw it all out and go back to what I was eating before? Definitely, not that last option, but my options are truly open. What to do? I finally realized I don't have to do anything other than what I have been doing. No need to rush for the finish line if being here in the middle somewhere feels right.
The Plan is no plan
So the plan is this, celebrate the end of the 30 days by having a glass of wine with my sister and a slice of cheese cake with my daughter—little celebrations I plan to enjoy. Then though, I am coming back to this process for a while, making friends with the middle. If an endpoint comes along at some point, I figure I can make friends with that too.
Thanks for reading!
My other Whole30 posts:
Whole30 - Day 20 – Eat Monkeys, Eat! This is my favorite so far. Steem on!
Whole30 - Day 16 – To Sleep Perhaps to Dream In which you get to read about the oh so bizarre dream life of my husband @preparedwombat
Whole30 - Day 13 – Food restriction for a Foody, food for thought
Whole30 - Day 11 – Looks like a knife fight, tastes like heaven
Whole30 – Day 10 – Lest ye mistake me for a paragon
Whole30 – Day 6
Whole30 – Day 5
Whole30 – Day 4
Whole30 - Day 3
Whole30 – Day 2
Whole30 – Day 1
Older posts you might enjoy
An F-Bomb for Christmas
Getting Married at the International Food Court
What I ate yesterday:
Breakfast: Cauliflower, blueberries and butternut "oatmeal" with almonds
Lunch: butternut squash soup and cucumber apple celery salad
Dinner: Cauliflower "rice", peas, onions and egg
Snack: Walnuts, banana, almond milk
painting from my darling daughter's paint box; other images courtesy of pixabay
I love your self evaluation of where you are at. There's a calmness to knowing that I get from the way you write.
It's crazy cool you're at day 25 too! I do hope you continue after this and I wish you the best of health as a product of that dedication!
Thanks Caleb. I don’t know that I will continue posting about the Whole30, unless something interesting comes up. But it sure has been a great way to start posting. Thanks for your comment.
Okay, I'll weigh in here. (Pun intended!) First, I love your post. You are always thoughtful and insightful, but this post goes above and beyond, really getting at some things we all deal with whether or not we are on a restrictive diet. There are so many reasons we start things--the proverbial New Years resolutions etc.--and so many reasons we end them as well. We got to the goal, or close enough. We forgot why we started. We got bored.
In this case, you have plenty of good reasons to continue. All the pain and sleep issues that have resolved are amazing. Since I've traveled this journey with you, and you asked for input, I will share my vote which is this: keep going. You've got this. You're succeeding beautifully at it, without making yourself bonkers over every little eating misdemeanor, which seems to me quite sustainable.
Plus I'm really jealous of your success, and as my sister it's your duty to humiliate and humble me. Kidding!
I've lost weight on this diet, but no other aspects of it have done for me what it has done for you. I don't even feel particularly great by comparison with how I felt a month ago. I have had some revelations: coffee without cream is not horrible; I am not an alcoholic and it was no big deal to give up my little happy hour glass of wine. But other than that? Meh. I've eaten more meat than I would like to, simply because otherwise I would pretty much be trying to sustain myself on vegetables, nuts and eggs. I'd rather eat less meat.
So, like you, I'm trying to find my place in the middle. I want to continue to maintain the weight loss I've achieved or ideally lose just a few more pounds. Going forward, I plan to keep what seems to work really well for me and make me feel healthier, and then adjust. I miss my garbanzo beans.
The beans! Yes the beans. They call to me too, in their tiny little legume whispers. For me it is beans and dairy. I miss yogurt and I miss bean soup. The rest hasn't been much of a loss, much less than I anticipated. But yes, whole-heartedly agree. We can take our time and figure out what we want to take away from this Whole30 thingy. As we've discussed, it is a little too regimented for us. The on-going version needs to be a little kinder a little gentler, a little less regimented. Whenever I think of someone doing this diet 100% on-track, I must admit my personal prejudices conjure up an image of an Amazonian warrior-ess, armor clad and battle ready. That ain't me. On the other hand, as much as I don't want to be her, and as much as I acknowledge my slips, errors, full on failures and overall humanity in this endeavor, I also value the lesson that I can do this. I hate to use such an numbingly overused word, but I really have been empowered by this month of restriction. The choices are mine, really, really mine. Such a gift to feel that way down deep in my soul. My choices are mine alone.