To forget — to remember for an eternity

in #writing7 years ago (edited)

Pink carnations. From Pixabay.


One finds inspiration in the most unexpected places. I reread this poem today and thought of how everything unavoidably dies. Even passion and the greatest loves. I kept thinking of it and started writing. I always write to think better. Here is what I came up with in the end. Both the writing and the drawing.

---

To forget

Over a field of white carnations stood our Anne Marie,
thinking, dying, lying to herself.
See him again? That would be mad. She'd rather die again.
It was futile to think of this.

She wandered into the forest where the stones awaited. Carve his name. What a brilliant idea. How would this help her forget? But she could not avoid it. His name was on many trees already, many rocks, many paths she had opened walking back and forth, thinking, thinking. There was nothing much to do in this place of cold suffering.

Intensity.png

She felt agony at first, an inertia to eat, to breathe warm air, to avoid freezing to death. But it seems the dead are exempt from dying. Who would know? She knew at first that she had accustomed to it. She could stand up at last, from feeling weak to at least feeling she could move. The hunger never left. The body preserved that feeling out of custom, perhaps.

And after a few years of not eating, not even eating could satiate the emptiness. It would stay there forever, perhaps, perhaps. But would he ever come? Would she ever see him again? He had told her to stay put if she ever got lost. He'd find her. He'd find her. But how could she stay put for so long? It hurt!

Death, oh, death, would you please take this unfortunate thinker who cannot stop yearning for the past? Maybe she could forget. Yes, she would forget, she promised herself. Forget, forget, forget, forget him. Need to forget him. So much love, so much love. Come back!

Under the cloudy sky of another morning she walked again toward her mountain cave. Perhaps one day it would fall on top of her head, burying her for half an eternity, or all of it. Who knew. There could always come someone and dig her out. Until then, her mind would scratch itself over and over, reminding itself of his existence.

She could find him one day, he could find her one day. Maybe someday. Yes. That would be good.



----

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Don't forget to read the poem that inspired me to write this post.

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Lovely style of writing, I have followed for more!

I'm glad you liked it. I'll surely write more pretty stories! Thanks for passing by, @samcook. I appreciate the comment.

Muchas gracias por pasarte por acá, @lorennys. Me alegra que te haya gustado. :)

Wish she would find him. Such pathetic and heart touching story . you’ve the unusual way of writing , by embedding deep feeling . Keep up the good work :)

:) Yes, you're right. I've found this to be the way I feel most fluent. I'm glad you liked it, and your comment is warm and lovely. Thank you for it.

Wow. That was VERY powerful. I love your use of repetition. The yearning comes over strong too. Really loved it. Awesome job Sharon!

cheers
Anj x

It's good to see that my effort paid off. Yearning. It's interesting to put myself in my characters' shoes. Thank you for your kind comment, Anj. :) <3

You're very welcome. Thanks for sharing :D

You keep on pumping these awesome stories... what about a short-story book?

Agh, ok, Ill stop thinking of projects for you xD
You're busy as it is!

I'd actually love to do that.:) My mom always says that she'd publish it herself if I ever wrote it. And it's one of my ambitions, but I have so much stuff to do that I've never actually gotten the chance to make a compilation with my stories. Not in Spanish, at least.

And it's very flattering that you keep thinking of projects for me hahahaha! It says a lot about the perceived quality of what I do. I'll try and be more efficient in order to have a bigger chance to follow my dreams.

id be excited to know a little bit more about what those dreams entail :)

and you should write more, because its incredible. in spanish, english, any of the languages!;)

i would however love to know which you prefer reading/writing in the most. languages - theyre a curious thing.

Hmmmmmm. I couldn't say. They're both different. Also, I'm sleepy right now.

On Steemit, I write in English, and this is the only place where I've written for months. It's a bit easier in Spanish, but it's also a bit harder not to let myself go by my subconscious and write nonsense. It's also harder to think of the aesthetics sometimes, since it's more natural, like talking.

I can do it. I have written poetry that I love in Spanish. I have not published it here and don't think of doing it, since I probably already published those poems under another name somewhere else. If I write new ones I'll be sure to link you to them.

To prefer reading. Again, I only read in English. The internet is in English and the places where I can post my content are all mainly in English, so instead of making my life complicated and making bilingual content or digging out stuff in Spanish, I'd rather just do it all in a language in which I'm very fluent and not have any difficulty in finding stuff to read.

But I have read in Spanish and I think I enjoy it the same. I know more complicated words in Spanish, so texts with these words read much better in my native language. This point is touchy one, since I'm just noticing it but it's very obvious. I know many complicated words in English too, but when I read a text that has these words, it's just better for me to read it in Spanish (aesthetically) because I don't find them strange and they don't cut off my train of thought or lead me astray from the poetic idea.

The same may apply for writing. I may write simpler texts in English than in Spanish (I probably do) due to the level of fluency it entails. Art for me includes a lot of flow. I could probably talk about this flow for hours on end.

i think its fascinating. being bilingual (or at least totally fluent) in another language is so fascinating to me. i am in love with the transition of one language to another. i speak spanish, but im terrible at writing it, and i would say i only seem fluent when it comes to certain conversations (especially in the present tense hahahah), and other times my lack of vocabulary and grammar makes me feel totally inept. but i so love it. i love the feel of it rolling off my tongue. its like when you love someone new - kind of unknown territory and a little scary and intimidating. and you dont know where its going to go next.

I will certainly write more. :) I can never stop doing this thing that I'm so in love with.

And about the dreams, let's leave that for the private chat since I'm sleepy and my filter needs some fixing that only my pillow can fix after a few hours of resting my head on it. Make sure to ask about it. That way I'll remember to tell you. You can tell me after you read this, and that will make a notification pop up and you won't have to do any remembering either.

hehehe already did!:)

the nuances and the lines written...

Awwww! I'm glad you noticed. :))

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you are the sweetest thing. and a force to be reckoned with. and a soul to be spoken for.

"it seems the dead are exempt from dying". i read it three times.

a force to be reckoned with.

:O Why is that? That seems warry and violent.

soul to be spoken for.

Does that talk about my independence or a need for representation?

:) I'm glad you passed by to read my text. I'll make sure to listen to your song tomorrow. Goodnight for me! (8:24 am)

" a force to be reckoned with" - its a saying we have in the States (https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/to-be-reckoned-with) its usually meant in a very positive way. like, you have a lot of influence, and you words have a lot of power :)

i think i was meaning an independence type of feeling. maybe "spoken for" isnt the best way to put it bc it could be interpreted different ways and other way lose the meaning. maybe just " a soul to be spoken" - something like you have an important message inside that needs to be preached and shared :))

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