High Noon on Jefferson: Chapter Three
Chapter Three
Lunch! Do they still have lunch on Earth? Or is that virtual? Or is it something that everybody does and nobody admits? Or has Earth become Hobbiton and everyone is constantly eating? Well, here on Jefferson, in Shadwell, at my school, we still have lunch.
You would think that after 'merely' being in Immies and lecture...and discussion...a teen would not be hungry. It's not like I ran around the school thirty times or something! Or was stuck on a treadmill in an Immie. Jurassic Park. That's my favorite training Immie. With lots of jump scares. Awesome for a work out. Tom convinced me once to the the Ellen Ripley Workout, he called it, and I will never do that again. My lungs got a work out, but so did the entire class' ears!
However, never underestimate a teenager and their need for food. They are more voracious than piranha. More volumous in their consumption than a bovine. More terrifying than a tyrannosaur. They will consume. And at that moment, I needed to eat. I tinked to my Pranksters were to meet and headed out the doors.
I had wanted to eat outside. That can be a risky business, as you know, Bob, with the taxitos, but I had brought some drones with me to school. I actually normally kept a pair in my bag and my bag kept them charged. It would signal to Mom's or Dad's house that the bag needed charging and a bot came, scooped up the bag, and charged it while I was sleeping. It finished before I woke and was returned to my room. I called the bots 'brownies.' Mom called them 'afonya,' after some sort of household spirit from her native Ukraine. I hope I didn't mangle that name too badly.
I found a nice spot, under a green tree, an actually green tree from Earth! with some shade and some sun. I tossed out the blanket, which kindly spread itself across the ground and then plopped myself down. I reached into the back pocket and felt around for case for the drones. I grabbed them and I felt something funny. I looked into the bag, but didn't see anything. Maybe it had been in the main pocket of the bag. I was going to look in a moment. I opened the drone case and threw both of them in the air. I tinked to the drones to fly around and watch for taxitos and zap them from the sky if they got within 3 meters of me or any my friends. I also told the drones to circle at 6m away from us. That way, we'd hear the drones a lot less. In the 22nd century, drones were far quieter than in the past, but they still buzzed some and given our nervousness over taxitos, buzzing was bad.
I had a sandwich, pastrami on rye, and a small side of shuba. What's shuba? It's salted or pickled herring covered in cheese, with beets, mayo and grated boiled potatoes. In layers. It's wonderful. However, it was also a delicacy. Herring isn't cheap on Jefferson and Mom had to get them delivered from the aquafarms in Monticello. She only did it twice per year, normally. Easter, orthodox Eastern that is, and New Year's. I had to take some with me to school. Why? Because I was worried it'd be all gone when I went home. Shuba was wonderful. However, I also had breath mints for after. And mouth wash.
Pastrami first though. Shuba has a strong taste.
Mmmm. Pastrami.
I had been thinking about eating and then Tom waved as he was walking up. I was distracted, really! I reached into my bag to grab my sandwich and
OUCH!
SOMETHING BIT ME!
On Jefferson or most worlds human beings had settled on, being bit was a very, Very, VERY dangerous event. Biochemistries were not exactly compatible. Sometimes evolution on another planet took a different route. That route produced a slightly different set of chemicals that did similar things to ones from Earth. Unfortunately, they were often poison for Earthlife. Saliva or its xeno equivalent could be lethal.
I screamed and pulled my hand out of my bag! I was surprised and it HURT! And I was terrified. Was I going to die?!
Tom ran as fast as he could and Jackie closed in faster. They both had epipens at the ready.
I continued to scream since whatever had bitten me had not let go.
I shook my finger so fast, you would have sworn it was a fan. It was a lot harder than it ought to be. Some metallic and the same length as my hand was attached still.
Still screaming, Jackie grabbed my hand and Tom started to inject me with the epipen. I saw what was on the end of my finger and I stopped screaming and stopped Tom at the same time. What was there on my finger was not Jefflife. It was not Earthlife. It was not life at all. It was a robotic lizard. It was a repticulate.
It might have broken bones - it hadn't. It might have caused me to bleed. It didn't. However, it was not going to cause me to have an allergic reaction. It was a machine. It seriously hurt, but I was no longer surprised. And I was no longer terrified. Do you know what you experience after being terrified and the thing that terrified you was still arond? It's one of two things. Either you get curious about what terrified you. or you get royally pissed off.
I was royally pissed off.
I walked around for a moment and Tom and Jackie were following me. Veena and Rosa were running over still. They knew my scream. Unfortunately. I found the largest rock I could hold. Then I found the largest rock in the ground I couldn't life. I placed the repticulate on the rock, the ground rock, not the rock in my other hand, and then took aim and Tom and Jackie screamed at me not to, but, by all that was good and right, that sucker was gonna be toast.
And smashed it was. Epically. Why? I'm ambidextrous. We're rare, but we happen. It's like God has a moment when He can't make up his mind on whether we were righties or lefties. Or maybe the switch didn't move fast enough when we were in the factory in Heaven on the way down. Or maybe the factory setting wasn't quite complete. Some angel tech forgot to set that one. Who knows. I do know though, my hands work equally well and the repticulate fond out the hard way, too.
Bite ME will you?!