I struggle with priorities. I want to help dad but am not sure if I can. It is confusing for me, too. I am posting all of this for the record for my blog as a reminder of how I was feeling and what I was doing. And it helps add clarity through the reflection. I feel that when people abuse others, we should try to speak out. I feel I am abused and that is part of why I share. Beyond that, I will try my best to do what I can to move on and to contribute to society as I have been in the past. This is not really who I am. I am not the kind of person that sits around and cry and complain and that is not what this is about. This is about a story between a father and a son and that is the main focus for now.

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But I was disagreeing with yoga. You said I should do yoga. I will continue to write and film videos and stuff. I will not stop doing that. But I like yoga and basketball and I do yoga sometimes but I would not do yoga as a substitution to venting, ranting, rambling rodding, talking, writing, filming, blogging, archiving my autobiography in random rough draft forms as seen in my posts and videos and everything. I will do yoga and stuff sometimes. I will try to make better videos and posts and other things too, but I will also publish and release crazy random rough draft posts, too, which is unprofessional and very hard for people to follow but I feel that I have to or want to publish as much and as often in case I am not able to someday or in case I die someday or in case I forget some of it or in case I lose some of it in case my hard drives and my videos are lost or accidentally erased or something. Writing is a form of therapy as well, too.