Delusional States of Mind: The Weekend Freewrite- 12/29/2018

in weekendfreewrite •  10 months ago  (edited)

Mother was dead. I sat up startled and leaned against the pine headboard of our bed. I hadn't expected the prescription drugs to dry her body out in the middle of the night. I touched her wrinkly, lifeless hands with a finger. Pulling my finger away left a blue mark. What was I going to do with the body?

I could have taken her to a ditch. Where? Someplace by the railroad tracks. I knew the crackers hang out in that area. They might be blamed for this unfortunate incident if I can direct the detective there. He has been following me lately. How was I going to get the body out without being spotted by him?

Getting out of bed, I picked up my nail polish from the coffee table and walk over to the stereo. The music that burst forth from the speaker was French music. The sounds of bells, drums and pianos filled the stuffy air.

I unscrewed the nail polish lid and start painting my nails. It was good Steve was no longer in contact with her.

However, after living with Steve for three years, she wasn't sure if the ants climbing up the wall would ever be gotten rid of with cleaning products. Were the ants ever going to leave? Now that she, Gabriel the tranny, was gone, they would undoubtedly make there way over the the decomposing corpse and have their way with her if I didn't clean up.

I had warned him not to get the sex change. She persisted. She now looked like Jessica Rabbit after having her six lower ribs removed.

She was a faithless little bitch. I'd caught her cheating on me more than once.

I needed a shower before I was going to go out into the world. Some drugs would have helped to straighten my mind out, giving me the vision on how to get this body out without being bothered by the detective.

I pulled out the blood red sweater I had worn on Halloween. I was a damn good looking vampire.

It didn't work. I tried and tried to stuff the head into the bag but the bag just wasn't big enough. I looked at the body in the tub. The tub had a crack. Blood was leaking out onto the floor through the crack. How am I going to clean up this mess before Steve gets back from vacation was beyond me.

"You were always a little manic depressive," said Garbiel's head.

I fumble with the head, grabbing the bleached hair and swinging it back and forth as I meandered to the refrigerator.

"Shut up, Gabriel. You're dead. I have morals to live by in front of others and you can't be seen here when my true love returns from the Bahamas."

"What you did in the darkness of this house will never be forgotten."

"Do you think I really care about that?" I grabbed a warm can of coke from the broken refrigerator.

"I've got the perfect disguise," I said after taking a sip. "With this vampire suit, people will think I'm off to entertain a group of adult children. The detective will surely be thrown off track."


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You sure packed a lot into this piece ( and it didn't have to be horror lol).

You brought us into the room and the situation right away, we were able to see the body and what is going on in the main character's mind. To me, the scene was very visual - you described the atmosphere without describing it - I think that is something you have been working on, right?

Like her state of mind - she gets up to paint her nails and turns on music - kind of what you don't expect from someone who just found a dead body - or just murdered a person. of course, the reference to drugs makes it even clearer.

I got a little bit lost with Gabriel. So, if I got it right, Granny ends up being Gabriel who used to be Steve before his sex change?

It did get very gruesome with the tub and head and such and came a bit as a surprise - but it is a freewrite and you did bring it to a logical in the story ending with her dressing up as a vampire.

I am not quite sure how Herbert fits into the story besides giving the urgency to clean up things fast. He seems to be a character that is very different from the main character that is being followed by the detective.

Probably something that could be developed more without the time restraints.

Now, I am curious what you did. Is it a technique from the new book you got?

This is the best explanation I found on the internet--> Clustering. The book I got it from is "Writing the Natural Way", of which I'm currently going through. I've used clustering several times. It feels easier to write and think of what to put into the scene. For those that struggle writing, they may like using this technique. Maybe we could create a series of post from the book? It has a lot of good information thus far.

I got lost with the second prompt. I couldn't figure out how to make sense out of it last night. lol The protagonist was with Gabriel the tranny, a.k.a. mother. Steve is the one coming home from the Bahamas.

I see what you are talking about. I'll change the name Herbert to Steve.

Thanks for your answer and time. 8-)

Horror and the macabre....
Kinda your forte ;p
I have come with another prompt


Click On Me For Prompt👇🏿


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