thoughts from a Veteran (on Veterans day)

With nothing to stay home for and nothing to fear, I set out to try to find something to believe in. I joined the Army, went to basic training and was sent off to my first tour of combat in Iraq in 2003.

I did well in the military, I have an out going personality which made it rather easy for me. It didn't take long for me to move through the ranks, in just less than 3 years I made it to Sergeant (E-5).

By 2007 I had served more than two years in combat in Iraq and decided that was enough, it was time to move on.

Veterans Day is one of the few days a year that I take the time to look through some of my old military stuff and think about my old life. I think about the friends I made while in the service, the friends lost at war, the friends lost after war and the 4 years of my life that changed me forever.
It is often a hard day, one usually filled with a roller coaster of emotions, both happy and sad. It is a time to reflect about choices I have made and have to live with, it is about learning from those hard choices not just burying them.

(I was in the Calvary so after my first tour of war I was awarded a stetson and spurs)

Over the last decade nearly all of my keepsakes and memories of my time in the service have been lost, misplaced or thrown away as they seem less and less important as time goes on. This is basically it now, I can fit my whole army life into a small box now. Funny how life changes so dramatically over the years.

Every one of these coins is a reminder of a mission. Something important. Something big. But with each passing year I forget more missions and more names. Sometimes the memories seem like just yesterday, and other days they are nothing more than a distant memory. Oh how quickly things change.

I think about the person I was then and who I have become today. So much of it was shaped by the experiences I had in the military and more importantly in war. It's weird how the most ugly, hard times of your life end up making you the person you appreciate most in the future. So don't run from the hard times, face them, attack them, and then learn from them. If you do this, you will respect yourself more later in life.

I am proud to be an American! But I have come to realize that war doesn't fix anything. It does nothing good for anyone. So as proud as I am to have served my country I no longer support the wars it creates and participates in!
So when I get thanked for my service I always have a hard time responding with the correct gratitude or reaction.

So when/if you thank a Veteran today (or any day) remember that it's not always easy to be thanked for going to war. So if you don't get a response or if the veteran acts awkward or doesn't really know what to say, don't assume they are being disrespectful, that veteran may just still be dealing with some painful memories. I know I am.

As a disabled combat veteran I want to thank all the other Veterans who have sacrificed so much! And to all of the family's who have lost loved ones to war, you will always be hero's in my eyes.

"Peace, love and all that hippie shit"