Listening is one of the best things you can do, if he does decide to share. No advice, no devils advocate... just good old fashioned listening.

I know some vets who get sick from being thanked because they've had a change of heart about the service and maybe even the country.

Imagine if you went to the military and suddenly felt that we were actually aggressors who are expansionists... and then you came home and everyone thanked you for helping the powers that buy to expand their control and reach even further than before?

I'm not saying that's the case here, just sharing what some of my other vets have expressed.