A Veterans Tale

I only had 6 months left in the Navy. This was the easy time. I had already served my time in the middle east and I was glad that it was over. I was on the downslide. I was scheduled for one more small trip on the USS John F Kennedy, but this was nothing to worry about. It was a two week trip to the Caribbean islands. I was looking forward to this. I thought of it as my farewell gift.

My family had plans to visit me the next week, before I left for the Caribbean. They had made hotel reservations, taken time off of work, etc. This last six months in the Navy was going to be great. I couldn't wait until the day that I got to go home. I was looking forward to the Caribbean Islands but I would much rather be at home with my family and friends.

I arrived at the paraloft thinking that this would be just like any other day. Before muster even occurred, my master chief approached me. He told me to go home and pack my sea bag. He informed me that I would be boarding the USS Enterprise at noon. I was off to the persian gulf again.

Noon? I had to hurry. I remained calm where others would be in a complete panic. I felt that there was no way that I could make it on time, but I had to remain focused. I had to be in Florida in 5 hours, this seemed impossible. I stuffed my sea bag tight, like any good parachute rigger would, and I was on my way.

What had happened was the parachute rigger who was attached to the Enterprise had gone AWOL when he heard about the war flaring up in Iraq again. A lot of people seem to do this when they are looking death in the eye.

I never question authority, so I went back to the barracks and packed my sea bag. There was no time to waste. I had lived here for a while so I had accumulated a lot of things. I packed only the necessary things, because there are not a lot of storage areas on a ship. Not only that, there are also things that you are not allowed to bring. Only the necessities. I left the rest to my bunkmate. I told him that he could return my things if he ever saw me again. I would normaly leave these things with my family, but that was not an option this time.

I was to report to the ship at noon. At this time I was stationed at Oceana master jet base just south of Norfolk Virginia. For those that don't know, this is the navy base that is not attached to water. Langley Air Force base is just north of that. I had to be in Jacksonville Florida at noon. They had aranged me a flight out of Norfolk to make it there on time, but I had to hurry, or I would be AWOL as well.

I boarded the ship on time. I was still in shock. As the ship pulled away from the pier, all I could think about was my friends and family. This was before cell phones, so I had no way to get ahold of them. For all they knew, I was dead.

I thought about them trying to get a hold of me. My mind raced with thoughts of letting my loved ones down. What have I done? Why didn't I just run?

Going through the Suez Canal was like a death trap. Egypt was on the right and I cannot remember what was on the left. This is when a Navy ship is at its most vulnerable point. It is unable to turn around or retreat, when facing oposition. This is not a small canal. It takes all night to get through. All I remember is us closing the hangar doors and sealing off all unnecessary hatches. We were preparing for war. The red lights were on.

They use red lights because they are harder to detect from the enemy. It also allows us to see in the dark, if we should get ambushed. Instead of sleeping in darkness. I had to sleep in light. It was red light, but I don't care what they tell you, it's not easy to sleep this way. You figure I would be somewhat used to this, due to my first time at war. No. It doesn't get any easier. To this day, I still cover my head when I sleep.

I remember sitting in the paraloft, with my gas mask readied, watching the security cameras that were mounted on the flight deck. The ship was completely sealed up. We call this General quarters. All watter tight doors must remain closed to section off the ship in case of a missle attack. It allows the ship to remain afloat, as only sections that are hit can fill with watter.

As we entered the persian gulf. I remember the tracers coming toward the ship while we moved forward toward Iraq. I remember the feeling of Doom. I remember the pictures that were taken of me, signing the bombs and the missiles. I can remember all of this.

I wanted off of this ship. I wanted it so badly. My life seemed to be out of my control at this point. It was in the hands of another. If I had my boots on the ground, at least I could defend my own life as well as those with me. I felt completely vulnerable.

The Enterprise pulled out, with us safely on board, as a West Coast ship was scheduled to pull in. It was over. Thank God, this nightmare is finnaly over. Not over for the world. The war was not over. My contribution was over, again. This brought me great relief.

Finally some peace. We pulled into Cannes France. This was a celebration. Myself along with four other guys decided to stay out all night and get a hotel. We were supposed to be back by 2:00 AM but we were there for 5 days so nobody would notice us missing. We just couldn't come back between 2:00 and 6:00 AM. We probably drank two times our weight in alcohol. We had a great time.

The next morning, well after 6:00 AM, we came back to where the ship was anchored off of France. The ship was gone. We argued about this. A friend that I once had, thought that maybe we were in the wrong area. The first bar that we stopped at was behind us, as we were looking out at the ocean.. I knew that this was the right area. To this day, I can remember every tiny detail of that bar.

We had been left. We were stuck here in a foreign country. Yes it was France, but it was still foriegn to me. I just wanted to go home, and it appeared that my ride had left me behind. At this point, everyone would have noticed that we were gone. All 5000 people on the ship had to have known by now that the 5 of us were missing. This sounds absured but word travels quickly. They do a muster upon pulling out to make sure everyone is on board. They were deffinately looking for us.

It was somewhat difficult to find help in France. We didn't really know our way around. We searched for the embassy. Nobody seemed to know where it was. We finally found the Uso and they directed us to the Embassy.

I remember arriving at the embassy. Apparently they flew us from one Embassy to another in a different country. I am not sure how we got there, probably a plane. I don't even know where we went or which countries we stopped in. I really have no memory of this.

My next memory was arriving back to the ship on a helicopter. The ship was apparently pulling out of Kosovo. It was a top secret mission. This is still not recognized as a war to this date. Maybe one day, when I am long gone, our mission will be declassified. The memory after that was a nightmare.

I have been out for almost 20 years. I still have nightmares. I have gotten used to them. They are an everyday thing. I am on my way to the V.A today. Hopefully they can help.