Owie! Sorry about your fingies! These are some profound insights you're learning about yourself. I wonder if it will help you feel clearer and more content with your focus/ purpose moving ahead. It's nice to not have the longing of a dream. In a big way you've lived your musician dream!! For example Your success in that arena inspired my interest and in Steem. Your nurturing suport kept me here. I'd say you've been hella successful in music! The pro videos, songs you've created and collaborated on and even financially you've been rewarded without any hoopla of conventional success (selling your soul to signing agency away, touring that would take you away from home etc) and really you have a great fan base that will enjoy whatever music you share as time goes on but it's likely going to be a sweet hobby treat (that will blister your fingers in agonizing pain) your whole life!! Great ulog tonight! Peace, harmony, love & gratitude Lynds ❤🎶🌙