In just one week
And so it is, in just one week I'm going to be in South America taking my first steps of a new chapter in my life. I won't lie, it feels nerve wrecking but at the same time, exciting. My father has been calling my phone every day too, partly because he has a list of plans in his mind, but mostly because he's anxious too, anxious to see what is going to happen.
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It feels at times that I went to sleep and woke up with gray hairs in my beard. All of the sudden my father is not young anymore, my mother can't climb trees or skateboard like she used to (not joking) and things that I used to see as problems as a child, seem to have lost their meaning, their difficulty.
In one of those conversations with my father, he actually confessed to me that he knew I would one day move to USA, that he knew before even I did. I asked him what he meant, and he simply said that I was probably going to follow in my grandfather's steps, the whole idea of going to America to become your own man, was somewhat programmed into my psyche by him. I don't know if it's entirely true, it very well may be the case, since he was a role model to my brothers and I.
I'm also going to confess something somewhat silly to this little blog of mine, simply because I'm always trying to be honest with myself and because writing these down, allow me to look back to my state of mind with a special type of time-machine. I'm a little worried about finding my place, as ridiculous at it may sound to even type it. I mean, I know I'm going to be fine, I know nothing bad is going to happen to me, it's more like I'm hoping I can find the role I'm supposed to be playing without much paralysis by analysis so to speak.
I'm going to leave this entry here, my mind is all over the place and I'm having a hard time deciding what I'm feeling. I fully realize that sounds like insanity is taking over a bit, but I won't correct that statement, not tonight.
It's a huge move man. Be easy on yourself. Everyone is going to have mixed feelings and be apprehensive and unsure. That's not being a MenO, its being a human!!
I won't tell you everything WILL be fine cos that's not necessarily true, but everything will most likely work out perfectly, you will feel more settled and get yourself to a place you truly want to be.
Best wishes to you fella...get it all down on your blog :-)
Wow. I feel excited for you @meno.
I think you will love it and really enjoy South America.
When I went for the first time to Central America, I fell in love with it and now we live here
You’re ramble was so appreciated by me.
Thank you.
No matter how old or how grey, we still hold our parents and who they were to us and how they shaped us for better or worse.
I’m in a very contemplative moment in my life. The why’s and ‘what really for’s’ have been sneaking up on me.
So thanks again for sharing, it helped me in my own process!
Sending you much suerte y poder!
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Hiya meno, the attached anxieties of finding one's place never goes away no matter what your age. There is that little feeling thermometer inside that is always working. Look forward to your posts from South America.
I surely believe you will be fine
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If it were easy, everyone would do it and not get the same results. I know you will be fine and begin to see different perspectives that will assist you on the journey! I look forward to seeing that process evolve!
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Hi bro. it will turn out well but it will be tough but you are on the right track as your growth is evident in this ulog however haywire your pondering may seem. the going will be tough but your growth enroute all this journey may form testimonial essence for others. I left with amazing hopes but I almost lost my parents, the next time I saw my mum, all her shine was gone and I spent 16 days with her till she passed and the next time I saw my dad, I couldnt go to him at the airport for 30 mins cos he was all ill. I live with him now and I cant explain ulogs, steemgigs, macrohard, teardrops or anything to him and I cant love him properly either. now all I want to do is not part but in my case, it wouldnt have been 'loving' if I did. intention is key and especially that is resounding even where we cant love as much as we want. my parents knew of all my intentions, they knew of my special gifts to, they knew I would need to go to tap into those sides fully and cos of what they knew about me, they let it be and they understood. if the intention is to grow (especially grow the human) and you are able to effect that, using each nee chapter, then it is a word cause. a harder route but a more testimonial route. also I felt the beauty of a ulog here; a conscious effort to 'mine the human' into its awesomest version
Please permit a little side-note:
Thank you for attempting to ulog today and for sticking around with us, whether bulls or bears.
We will soon resume full-blown activities especially as ulogs.org begin to take full shape and with the birth of the teardrops SMT. There will be ulog-cats and all. ulog-subtags to bear forth ulog-communities.