Traveling Showed Me The Things That Really Make Me a Happier Person - My Journey to Happiness

It was Christmas and I was crying. I was alone. Perhaps I could just end everything because it didn’t make sense to live anymore... I just ended yet another relationship. That was my life before, jumping from one relationship to another and eventually losing myself in the process. I was in a relationship for a long time, then another one after that. The first one was a total nightmare as he tried to commit suicide when I left, he eventually accepted that I needed to be free. I just felt being trapped. I was trying to get this happiness from men, who just made me feel disappointed in the end. I was trying to fill this empty void, but It didn’t work. I didn’t know how to be alone.

I didn’t try to escape from depression, I sat with it, and dealt with it without turning to drugs or alcohol, and faced it alone like a brave woman I was trying to be. Pain is good, something I had already gotten used to... I just let my tears flow like a river, until I got so tired of it. One day, for some reason, I just suddenly woke up and had enough. I already gave myself some time to embrace loneliness, it’s time to change. Today, I’m going to change my life, I choose to be happy.

“The beauty of adversity is that when we hit bottom, the only way to go is up.”
― Dana Arcuri

I got out of my bed. Then I started thinking of all the amazing things I should be doing in my life, this is my chance to be happy. I’m still young and alive. So I started writing down the things I wanted to do, those things I’ve been missing out on life all those years.

1. Learn Spanish (I enrolled in a Spanish language class), because I wanted to travel in South America someday
2. I will go to the swimming pool and swim regularly, like a body workout
3. Make new friends
4. I will travel around my country
5. I will quit my job and see the world

6 years later, I was traveling alone around South America, and I can speak Spanish fluently now. I’m very happy with my new found freedom. Loneliness sometimes still visits me though, but I don’t let it stay. It cannot affect my inner happiness anymore.

I’ve always loved nature, I just didn’t have time before because life got in the way. I was busier in my job and with that toxic relationship. I remember traveling around the south of Argentina, amazed with its virgin beauty and beautiful landscape. I remember trekking through this snow-covered path going to the waterfalls in Patagonia. I remember walking along the shore on an empty beach in Uruguay, feeling the cold water beneath my feet.

My happiest days were when I got to spend some time in nature, alone with my thoughts, appreciating the beauty that surrounds me.

I remember reading a book by the river, surrounded by the view of snow-capped volcanoes in the south of Chile. I remember walking the dogs while waiting for the sunset on a secluded beach in Ecuador. I remember listening to some good music while hanging out with my Couchsurfing host and his friend in Brazil. I remember making new friends from all over the world, and most of my friends now are from other countries. I remember being surrounded by sharks as I dive in the Galapagos. I remember watching the sunset every day that marks the end and the beginning of something beautiful.

“I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery—air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, "This is what it is to be happy.”
― Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

I remember those things that make me a happier person. Happiness is like a cake, if you put more icing on top of it, it will become more delicious. My journey to awakening the inner happiness. I started appreciating the things that become the icing on the cake. I know that I love books, nature, animals, and music. These are the things that really make me a happier person and traveling just made me realized it.

As I grow older, I preferred these things more. I’ve already gotten used to being alone that it is already hard for me to be with people or be with anyone. But I’m not giving up on love because I know that happiness is real when shared. The most important thing is that, with or without the icing, happiness is still there. I still struggle from time to time, with loneliness as my regular visitor, but it’s fine. I'm aware when I'm happy, and I'm aware when I'm temporarily lonely. I sit and deal with it, understanding these feelings like they are my good friends. I don’t escape from it anymore, or go looking around for someone to fill the void. I remember the things that travel has shown me and made me realized. Everything is just a part of this journey called LIFE.

“Face your life, its pain, its pleasure, leave no path untaken.”
― Neil Gaiman