My Ayahuasca Experience

My head was spinning and I was vomiting really bad, I felt like I would die. It was quite scary actually. I couldn’t even make it to the bathroom, so the shaman brought some buckets to the living room. Yes, I was in a house, actually a nice, big house and not in some remote, tribal village in the Amazon. But how did I end up in this situation?

When I was volunteering in the spiritual community in a remote village in Brazil, I was invited by other volunteers to join an Ayahuasca ceremony. That time, I didn’t have any idea what this Ayahuasca thing was all about. Ayahuasca is a brew made of vines, roots, and plants containing DMT. And the brew is used as a traditional spiritual medicine by the Indigenous people of the Amazon in shamanic ceremonies.

This has gone mainstream as more people travel to South America to experience it, those who are seeking some spiritual healing. However, the tradition has become quite commercial and controversial these days as it is now being used for tourism and profit by some local groups.

I was up for anything and my friends from the volunteering community were really serious about this. The day before the Ayahuasca ceremony, I was asked not to drink coffee, eat meat or anything with dairy. Some people even do it weeks before. I admit that I was not quite serious but I was ready to try Ayahuasca just for the experience.

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There is this rich Brazilian lady living away from the community who was doing some Ayahuasca ceremonies. The members of the spiritual community already warned us about her, which later on, I realized, she turned out to be a mean lady. Anyway, that’s another story. She hosted me and my friends from the US and the UK in her house. And of course, we paid for the ceremony. Then she and her husband prepared some fancy vegetarian food. The wealthy couple has this huge ranch and some animals on their property, and they seemed to be away from the rest of the world, which was quite interesting.

Anyway, that night, the living room was designed to have this eerie, spiritual ambiance with the smell of some therapeutic oil and flowers. She lit some scented candles and turned off the lights. I lay awake on the couch, while my friends appeared to be sleeping. I was told to close my eyes. I heard the tribal music being played in the background as the lady Shaman walked back in forth in her white robe. I tried my best to ignore the weird feeling, it was my first-time to try Ayahuasca and it was just normal to feel shocked of what was happening around me.

The music went on and the Shaman recited something I didn’t understand. Then we were asked to get up and gather around the dinner table. We looked at each through beams of yellow light, and the Shaman passed the first Ayahuasca shots.

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Honestly, I’ve never tasted anything so disgusting and awful in my life! It was like this weird mixed of plant stuff and really gross, thick mud juice very difficult for me to swallow. I tried to hide my reaction so as not to disrespect everyone around me. Anyway, I took the shot to see what would happen to me after.

My friends and I went back to our own places in the living room. I closed my eyes and waited for a giant plant to appear and talk to me. That’s what they say, a plant that could change my life. I listened to this tribal music and chanting in the background....

🎜...Ayahuasca, ayahuasca, ooooh, ayahuasca. Ayahuasca, ayahuasca, ooooh ayahuasca….🎜

No giant plant yet. Actually, I had this vision that something like this would appear and talk to me anytime.

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You know, like a mega flower or something.

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I can change your life....

I was just being swayed around and around while my eyes were closed. Like falling endlessly and being swallowed by a black hole. Then there was this maze of different colors, but there was no talking plant yet. Talk to me! I shouted in my mind, maybe I was taking this ceremony the wrong way, but surely, the trip was fun.

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Oh wait, this was it? I was actually feeling the effect after an hour. I opened my eyes and saw the ceiling melting and circling....

Yes, that was it for me and nothing more. I was actually just smiling and feeling happy that I told my friend beside me what I was experiencing at the moment. It was like the effect of magic mushrooms.

We were asked if we wanted to take another shot, and that was my last one. My stomach obviously couldn’t take it, and that was why I threw up really hard. My friends took another after that, but I just had enough.

Then I heard my friend sobbing, and then they were crying and all that. I wonder what kind of revelation and spiritual thing they were experiencing.

Actually, you don’t need drugs to experience this. If you want to see what I mean, just play and stare at this video below for like 2-3 minutes, then look away.

Did you see it? This video is addicting that I kept staring back at it just to take me back in time.

The Shaman signaled me to shut up and close my eyes. Maybe she thought I was not being serious. I mean, what could she do, I was happy and I had no issues in life. I guess....

Ayahuasca is a big deal for some spiritual people, especially those with some issues in life, those who were trying to find something with the help of a power plant or drug? I know some people will be against what I’m saying because they really take this seriously. Maybe I didn’t choose the right ceremony or I should have gone to the Amazon or something. I don’t know, but that was enough experience for me.

I even heard some horror stories in South America where some people died due to overdose, or a European girl who went to the Amazon alone to attend the Ayahuasca ceremony, then being raped and thrown into the river after. One should be smart about these things, obviously, Shamans are just humans and nothing more. It only means they are capable of doing nasty things, and some of them are just taking advantage of the tourists, especially with the high-demand of this experience these days. If you want to try for experience, then it would be better to be with friends or some people you trust. You don’t know what it's like when you become totally not in control, it can be scary. You don't need the help of drugs or plants to change your life, it's only you who can do that.