Tin Foil Raps 2 - A paranoid Rhymes Contest Entry

Hi everyone this is my entry to the TinFoilRaps, category 2, imagine you're all watching this pay per view battle rap being broadcasted from Pyongyang,the presenter is Kim Jong Un and it's two groups, Westerners including Trump and Theresa May are up against Syria and Co. thats Assad and Putin, who ever wins claims Syria.

Enjoy:

Kim Jong Un - "Here we are in TinFoil HQ in Pyongyang for our main event, on one side we have Westerners including Donald Trump and Theresa May vs Assad Mob including Assad and Putin, a freestyle rap about whats going one in this fucked up world, winner who drops the most knowledge gets to do whatever they want with Syria. We will start with a coin toss to see who goes first, Trump heads or tails?"

Trump - "I'll go for heads but can you throw it? My hands are quite small"

Kim Jong Un - "Tails it is Assad do you want to go first or second?"

Assad - "Your countries have always attacked first so you can start"

Kim Jong Un - "Trump you go first here's the mic at the sound of the beat start rapping"

(Beat starts)

Trump
"Yo listen up my fellow amerikkans,
haters of immigrants and mexicans,
I'm the best president of all,
of course I am, I promised to build a wall,
with all the bullshit and all the lies,
and all the rockets going to the skies,
I promised all this to women and men,
that I will make america great again,
all immigrants should go in the bin,
unless you're rich, you can come in,
I have small hands and they say I'm bitter,
but they are quite useful when it comes to twitter,
I'm glad I came here fully equipped,
not talking about bombings
I'm talking about this script."

Kim Jong Un - "Daymmm starting this shit off with a bang, your turn Assad"

Assad
"I don't understand why everybody blaim's me,
they all point fingers and everybody frames me,
good thing I have Putin on my side,
I won't run away, won't back down or hide,
but real talk he's always got my back,
never blames me about the false chemical attack,
I always ask myself why you attack and go wild,
then I remember my banks not owned by the Rotschilds,
yes I know the US,Uk and the west is gonna holla,
that why I dropped the fucking US dollar,
you lied about Vietnam and Afghanistan,
you created an afghan clan that had a plan,
but they never had any weapons of mass destructian,
I didn't forget Iraq and Libya,
you went quite low, like a blow to the tibia,
Gaddafis regime was ran with simplicity,
he gave the Libyans free healthcare and free electricity,
but you made up a load of shit and you lied and bragged,
another one of your great false flags,
people were believing in me, shouting "the mack is back"
but then you go and blame me for the chemical attack,
you say no country should gas their people, you're such a swine,
tell me? what the fuck happened at the Dakota pipeline,
we didn't didn't send our men or fire up rockets,
but when it comes to war, the only thing that matters
is money in your pockets."

Kim Jong Un - "Woooooooooow yes my G Assad representing Syria round one to you Western 0-1 Syria and Co. round 2 Theresa May vs Putin, Theresa take the stage"

Theresa
"Hello I'm Theresa if you don't know me you may exit,
I'm a conservative, love England and voted leave in Brexit,
England for the English if you're not one you can leave,
that's my main objective that I want to achieve,
I've always wanted to be up there with the elite,
always at the rituals eating little kids meat,
I spend nothing on the homeless but on war millions,
and I laugh when the lower class calls us reptilians,
listen closely let me tell you something delightful,
I shapeshift whenever I want, isn't that frightful?
after the chemical attack Assad I had no alternative,
I just wished your parents would've used a preservative,
I'll just put a load of rubbish on BBC news,
and let the poor little sheeple get confused,
they will think that your bad,
and they will turn mad,
we will keep on destroying your home,
while we pay trolls to debate about the dome"

Kim Jong Un - "That's quite tough to beat Putin here's the mic"

Putin
"Here I am to close the show,
and I'm gonna drop some gems that I think you should know,
I'm on Assads side and that's where I should be,
I'd never join you liars not for any fee,
lets start with 9/11 and talk about other stuff later,
jet fuel burns steel but not passport paper,
we've questioned the whereabouts of the pentagon plane,
instead the call you mad,crazy and insane in the brain,
the day before it happened Rumsfeld appeared,
stating 2.3 trillion dollars from the pentagon disappeared,
and what about the Gulf of Tonkin incident,
we know that was a false flag Mr.President,
what about the Pearl Harbor attack,
admit it, its happened you can't go back,
you moved all the nazi scientists to the US what a dick,
oh I just remembered that was operation paperclip,
how did you get to the moon I don't know,
maybe it was all done in your film studio?
you invade every country with men and tanks,
just because they don't have Rotschild banks,
when he wrote to Balfour claiming the land,
the UN agreed and stretched out their hand,
since then they have been occupying illegal territories,
you support them instead of Palestine what such funny stories."
(Putin drops the mic, everybody goes crazy even Kim Jong Un looks surprised)

Kim Jong Un - "Well, well, well that's what I call battle rap, 4 great mc's battling it out and I think we have a winner...
representing Syria and Co. Assad and Putin"

Assad - "Thank you, thank you finally something goes in my favor I'm sure you won't hear this on mainstream media though..."

Kim Jong Un - "Probably not the sheeple don't even know what a battle rap is, after this win Syria is yours, what will you do?"

Assad - "As I've always wanted, drop the US dollar, not have a Rotschild owned bank, and start rebuilding the destroyed houses, which will be payed by the Americans that voted for Trump"

Kim Jong Un - "Well that's all folks tune in next time for another TinFoilRap see you soon"