Looking at your post here I can't help but reminisce how being sick constantly has deprived me of capitalising on a lot of opportunities in life in other to make my life better. I think it's your period of reflection since you're away from the hustles and bustles of life. But if you ask me I think 1996 happened and because of that it might have made you led a different life despite the health complications
I think counterfactuals are good for analysis of action, but not useful if used to feed regret.
The past is what it was, the future will be what it is yet to become.
Exactly how favourable the future might turn out Irrespective of how the present seems is yet to be known I think I thrive on that uncertainty personally
It is all certainly uncertain, best to embrace it.