We all have a dark side

in #thealliance2 years ago

When we talk about our dark side, we are talking about our flaws. No one is perfect and we need to accept that but the only thing that matters is how "Dark is our Dark side" and are we in acceptance with our dark side.

Our Dark side means our flaws, limitations, anti social behavior, aggressiveness, unacceptable behavior. We all fear our dark side to be publicly showcased so we are covering it up superficially to show that we are perfect and that we cannot think negative or bad, but the fact is that if the good exist the bad does too and we need to accept that the 2 sided coin will always be there, it is just the different degree of the darkness within us.

Specially when we are younger in our teenage it is much likely to have these developed. Then it is the hand holding of our elders that will determine if it grows or it fades away. I have seen this many a times, children get into a habit of theft. At that age their wants are more due to a lot of external circumstances influencing them, and to fill up on those wants and desires they try to get their way around which is most easy and convenient for them. Children easily develop the habit of speaking lies because sometimes they fear the reaction of their elders. So these dark sides start building up from there. If the elders at that time do not do the right counselling and supporting them, it will gradually grow up.

As we grow up in adulthood these dark sides start getting complicated for us. We may have started smoking just for fun in the younger days but as we grow up this can become an addiction for us which can bring a lot of harm to us. Most of the time we cover up our dark side trying to show a clean image to the people around us.


So how do we handle this dark side?

Realization and Acceptance

I think if we understand that we have a dark side the most important is to first accept that we have a dark side and we need to work on it. Realization and Acceptance are the most important things to manage this problem. No one is perfect and we all have flaws in some or the other way but we can always work towards it. Our dark side is like our shadow it will always follow us, we cannot run away from it.

Seek Help

When we want to deal with any problem it is good to seek help from someone who is more capable of guiding us and helping us out. Release the fear of judgment, the fear of how will people perceive me if my dark side is exposed. The end goal is I want to be a better ME

Releasing the EGO

Our Ego is the main culprit for many of our problems in life, we do not like to surrender and show that we have weak areas in our life. Ego refuses to take help, tries to show I am strong, I am perfect. If we can let our Ego rest and think of our growth in real sense, can we work towards our dark side.

This journey will bring in a lot of confusion, we may not be able to determine who we exactly are, the process is tedious and demanding but when we are able to embrace our our dark sides, accept the complete self, remove the superficial mask, we see there is a whole new world of possibilities. We are able to strengthen our capacity.

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That post was very honest and insightful. I like how you said that realizing and accepting that we have a dark side is important. Denial is so frustrating to encounter. All of us are capable of very awful thoughts and it’s nice that people like you are showing us that it is normal and can be dealt with in a healthy way.

Thank you @newcastle for resonating with my thoughts.

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Realization and acceptence is great thing..the best part is once we realize and accept..life becomes so beautiful.. our new jounery starts ..

It is the most difficult part but once crossed there is no looking back. Thank you for visiting my blog @manjula2611

Thanks for touching on this difficult subject, precisely because of its dark nature. The dark side, we all have it, and we must come to terms with it.

I like your example of children (and adolescents) stealing, as this is a perfect illustration of the dark side. However, instead of filling an external need, I think many of these cases are driven by something even more profound: power! As growing individuals they need to assert themselves, in whichever way possible. That also explains outbursts of vandalism at that age, as well as other stupid things kids tend to get into.

What I don't agree with, however, is that we need to release our ego. Just like everything else, the ego has its rightful place and purpose (the way I see it). It is the manifestation of oneself, one's will. It's a powerful tool, making us powerful creatures, so we need to know how to handle it well. Instead of giving it up (and thus surrendering ourselves to... exactly: other people's egos), we should get to know it, control it, train it, and use it under the right circumstances for the right reason. Sometimes you just need to hit the negotiating table, on other occasions kicking the table over completely is what may be called for. Knowing the exact when, how, and why, that takes lots of practice, which we can't develop if we don't work with our ego that we have.

Thank you @stortebeker for sharing your thoughts. Yes I agree ego management is very important but this little thing keeps interfering in every aspect of life. The dark side will always exist in some or the other way and there is nothing wrong about it. How we deal with it is more important.

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