This is a beautiful, honest, heartfelt post and I can relate to so much of what you said. I know that after writing the Granuaile post, I had to disappear for a few days. I went online a couple of times to have a quick look at things that other people were writing and upvote their posts, but I didn't feel able to write again myself until last night.
The Granuaile post was quite an emotional one for me, as I expressed so much of the heartache I had been feeling in the days prior to writing it. The outcome of that rape case verdict I mentioned in it took a huge toll on me - one that I'm still working through, to be honest!
Take all the time you need to recover and regain your energy. I'm sure that judging the history contest was immensely rewarding, but intense too. All of your loyal followers will still be here when you come back to Steemit, and we'll be excited to see what you write next! ❤😊 I always love reading your work.