The Day I Met My Son: An Adoption Story

Today, two years ago, I held my son for the first time. A day I will never forget, I can relive the day almost to every detail. I didn’t conceive my son, I didn’t get to carry him for 9 months. He became mine through adoption, but the moment I saw him I knew and felt that he belonged to me in every way that counts, he was my son at first sight.  

The day started off early, in actual fact there was no real start to the day, since I couldn’t sleep! I had a hard time choosing my outfit, I wanted to have the “mom” look, but wasn’t quite sure what that was yet (now I know it's clothes covered in trails of snot and sticky food). I also wanted to impress my Social Worker, I still had this dreaded feeling of “what if she decides this child is not for us”. I decided upon a soft blue jersey and a lacy scarf (my sister’s), which was a good choice, I’ll explain why later.  Our baby bag was ready, in all my excitement I had packed it days ago already. As we headed out the door we were hit by a gust of ice cold wind. It was a freezing day (perfect for baby cuddles). 

Our first stop was our social worker’s office, where we met her before driving to the hospital and then to court, to get our boy into our safe care (the adoption was finalized months later). On arrival, there was a bit of confusion, the court didn’t have all their paperwork ready, like they should have, my heart sank deeper than it ever had before at the thought that we might not get to take our son safely home. But thanks to our AMAZING social worker who had all the right connections, we managed to push the paperwork through and all was to proceed as planned. 

Next step: the hospital. My baby was 4 months old when we met him and brought him home. The circumstances of how he became adoptable is his story to tell. I hope that my husband and I can raise him to be confident with himself so that one day he can bravely tell his story, knowing that he was made for this world with purpose and that he is loved in every way.  The moment I first laid eyes on our child: My husband and I were both very nervous, I think me more than him. We had no clue what he looked like, what his health status was or how much he weighed. As we approached the little room he was kept in, I could see him through the window in the distance. I saw his chin first, his pointy little chin.  He was lying there so still, he looked at us with the biggest baby eyes I had ever seen. He was beautiful, perfect. Why did God bless us so much? He looked at us like we were strangers, which we were. But he gladly let me hold him, feed him, and change his nappy – while watching me intently with those BIG eyes! He held on to my scarf and scrunched it in his hands (perfect outfit) and fell peacefully to sleep. It meant everything to me that I could make him feel comfortable and safe.  

We spent a few hours at the hospital discharging our boy and we caught up on his health status etc. At 4 months, he only weighed 3.2kgs. Then it was time for the legal proceedings, which took up the rest of the day. But that was ok, I got to sit holding and staring into the face of my  child. 

Once the t’s were crossed and the i’s dotted, we could go home!  We sent our family members and friends photos of our son, but we couldn’t post anything on social media. Still, the well wishes poured in and again we felt extremely blessed. We proceeded to bath our son for the first time, we did a whole lot of “firsts” with him. By the next day, it felt as though he was always there, always ours. 

While I love how I became a mom, I am not ignorant to the fact that my son had a rocky start in life, and that he will face obstacles that I might not understand or be able to help him with (this breaks my heart). But I do feel that he came into this world with purpose, that he is part of a plan that is bigger and more wonderful that he or I will ever know. 

Thank you for sharing this moment with me - @sweetpea