HUMOUR: Me And Fine Girl (Part 1)
I was going to school this morning when I spotted one fine girl from a distance. Tee King no dey carry last na. I approached.
Me: "Hi, good morning. I have been staring at you for quite a while now. Please don't mind my saying you are an excellent and distinctive work of God. Every strand of hair on your head glows like polished diamond. Your skin radiates like a blushing sun and your shape is a testimony that the earth is round."
(Fine girl was just looking like someone in haste but I didn't mind, I continued...)
"I'm Micheal by name and I'm addicted to being friend with angels like you. Would you please give me your contact at least because I see you are in haste."
(Fine girl's phone rang and she picked...)
Fine girl (to the caller):
Hello dear. I'll be there in a jiffy. Just wait a bit more. Love you dear.
That's how the fine girl flagged down a cab, entered and looked at me with one horror face.
It's opposite a bank and the people at the ATM stand were just looking at me. Some of them laughing. I just carry my leg waka, make I go bathe again for house.
"This world is really a wicked place to be.", I murmured as I left.
I am that weak-kneed when it comes to fine girls. I only seem to hide it. One reason I have been secretly crushing on Emily Benson since last year January. (Don't tell her I mention her name o please).
So yesterday I went to see my project supervisor for somethings. I met his absence but saw an angel instead. This young girl whose age I supposed would match mine was on his seat. Immediately she told me to wait for his arrival and offered me a seat, I turned a spoken word artist. Only God knows why I don't stammer when I'm speaking with fine girls.
We talked and talked till the extent that I forgot what it was I came for. This girl was too friendly, we spoke at length, shared ideas, and just as she was about typing her mobile number on my phone, my supervisor walked in.
This man looked at me with one kind eyes that I began to feel pains in my tummy. And when the girl finally called him 'Dad', I just began to say our Lord's prayer. I collected my phone from her, dropped my file and walked out.
My entire body system has refused to be in order since yesterday. Something tells me I have eaten a forbidden fruit. I can't just imagine the girl telling her father I offered to be a friend (how all toasting begin). I'm scared and even ashamed of the poems I recited to her (someone once told me this, "dude, you'll still die of poetry one day").
If and only if God saves me from this, I will remove my eyes and keep them in my pocket. Project is a 3unit core course and this is my final year. Baba God, I know you love sinners. Just give me this one more chance, and I will repent and change my ways forever.
...to be continued. Follow this blog for more.
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