SteemFest 2016: A Tale of Debauchery in Amsterdam – Day 1

As I stumbled my way back to my hotel Saturday night, I was distracted by the beautiful red lights.

There was a cobblestone alley between two small buildings. A sexy seductress coaxed me in and offered me a taste. A taste of what? I had no idea. The entire day was mostly a blur. But let’s rewind for a moment and see how I ended up here.

I arrived in Amsterdam on Friday afternoon. I made my way to the De L’Europe hotel and checked into my room. I had a long journey from the Americas and a bit of trouble with my passport. I was ready for a drink. So the first thing I did after arriving in my very colorful room was to hit the mini-bar.

One tiny bottle of Tanqueray Gin. Gone!

One tiny bottle of Chivas Regal. Down the hatch! Well why not have another? I earned it!

These little bottles were getting annoying with their tiny caps that were getting harder to twist off. After downing five minis, I headed to the hotel's piano bar for some tunes and a few beers. I’m not much of a talker so I wanted to get “warmed up” before heading out to the meet-and-greet that night. I ordered a Stella Artois and listened to a Dutchman play Liszt’s Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 on the baby grand piano. I looked out the window at the beautifully lit canal. A gondola full of cold but smiling faces had just passed by. It was such a delight!

I ordered another beer as the Dutch pianist tickled the ivories. A lovely woman walked in and sat at the bar. She ordered what appeared to be a pink lady and slung her P-coat on the back of the chair. She said something to the bartender in Netherlands-speak as she glanced over her shoulder at me. They had a laugh. Surely at my expense.

I finished my second Stella and walked over to the bar to order a third. The woman stared at me the entire time I stood there. As I was about to walk away, she turned and faced me.

“You are man from America television, ya?”

I gave her a puzzled look.

“That man from music show?” She threw a half-smile at me and raised her chin. “With turning chairs and singers?”

I have been told that I look like Adam Levine. I don’t see it. But she thought she did.

“Um. No? I don’t think I know who you’re talking about.” That was a lie. I turned and walked back to my seat by the window. I had no time for small talk and flirtatious guessing games. I had an event to prepare for. And by “prepare for,” I mean, “get hammered!”

A few more beers later and I was ready for the show! I paid my tab and walked out to the street. I took a deep breath and headed to the very first SteemFest meet-and-greet!

I didn’t make it.

I ended up at a bar around the corner. I don’t know the name of it. I don’t remember which one it was. I only remember walking in, ordering a few shots, and then opening the door to my hotel room at some point later that night. There was a brief image of a tattoo mixed in there somewhere.

The next thing I remembered was waking up in the morning and seeing a woman leaving my room with a gray coat across her arm and black shoes in her hand.

That wasn’t a good sign.

I was pretty groggy. I wasn’t even sure where I was. The room was cold. I looked to the windows and saw that one was open. There was an empty bottle of champagne. There was an ashtray next to the couch with a couple of roaches in it. Not the insect kind. There were pillows on the floor. My pants were thrown across the desk. I was naked.

A flash of memory came back to me. It was a brief conversation with an English girl. She was telling me about her flight. I remembered feeling quite bored. She was cute though. She had pretty green eyes, pouty pink lips and a little nose. Strawberry blonde hair. Her jeans fit her very well. Her black heels really accentuated her legs and butt. The gray wool coat covered everything else.

Now I was a little bit worried. I wasn’t sure if anything had happened between us. I did a quick check just to be sure. I was good! But I wondered. Why am I naked and what was she doing here?

There was another flash of memory.

Nothing was adding up. I checked to see if my wallet was still there and that the contents were still inside. Everything was good.

I checked my kidneys. Still had both.

I didn’t have time for thinking. My mind was foggy. I couldn’t have been sleeping more than a couple of hours. I needed some rest but it was 8:00am and Saturday was going to be a long day.

This was the first full day of the very first SteemFest! This was going to be a day to remember! I was going to meet so many influential Steem users! I needed to have a great start to my morning and head over to the festivities.

So I went back to sleep.

SGL

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End of Day One

Day Two Coming Soon!

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