OVER THE SILVER SKY TO THE WORLD OF NEVER : Part 220 - The Glitter Became Agitated Again.

Everybody does it, but nobody talks about it. I'm talking crap. Yes that's right I am going on about shit. Writing shit about shit is the next big thing let me tell you. The last taboo until the next one comes along. I'm lucky because I've spotted the trend early on. People were coming up to me in private to quietly ask me what my biggest ever shit was. If I've got my phone on me I'll happily show them all the pictures of my favorite dumps. It's not just size. Shape, color and consistency are important to the overall aesthetic of a turd. I'm not on about those times when you've got fluid shooting out of both ends at the same time. Not only is that not a shit it's not something you can enjoy. Everybody enjoys a shit, but nobody talks about the joy shitting brings. Among my most impressive turds are some monsters I can tell you. I'd share them all, but I'm planning a semi-autobiographical novel of my shits. Look at that beauty in the picture. Wouldn't you be proud if that had come out of your bottom? I know I was and it's not even mine. That took a lot work you know. My ass still hasn't recovered. The seal isn't as tight as it once was. Now ordinary farts are a cause for concern. The lesson is that if you are doing big dumps always take care of your ring piece. I'd recommend some stretching exercises before lift off, if you get me. You don't want to tear do you. Never strain either, let that big bastard slide out under its own steam on its own timetable. Follow that advice and you can't go wrong.

(The copyright to this image is the property of Sick Chirpse.)

The decision made, all Jake had to do was get there. How he was going to do that only occurred to him now. The times he'd been to his memory palace had been automatic. The need arose, he found himself in that long corridor of doors. If it wasn't that, it was another agency taking him there. Going now might require some work. He lay down on the floor of the ship. Chiro's visual manifestation of lights still flickered before him. Hermes was concentrating on the coitus and that was potentially going to happen between Pengelly, Taini and Daisy. Which would inevitably end up getting serious no doubt. They were fooling around right now. A lot of kissing and heavy petting between 3 consenting adults desperate for sex, but prolonging the entree. Emptying his mind seemed like an avenue. Easier said than done with what was going on around him. In the direction of the house anyway. Scarlet had got him to her memory palace using that coded phrase that switched him off. Like most of his coded phrases it was single use. Only functioning once. So that wasn't going to help. It could be impossible. His thoughts too crowded and disturbing. All he really wanted to do was get there, away from this madness inducing scenario.

He was walking along the corridor? That was a whole lot easier than he'd expected. Best of all there was no contact with that bloody ship and all its data collection. Data that was of no use to the ship. It couldn't be transmitted to the Ustraski universe. The data was for him. Jake hoped it wasn't for voyeuristic purposes. Praying that this situation hadn't been brought about by a version of him that was perverted. Step after step along a seemingly infinite hallway. Passing uncounted doors. Most unnoticed. A few that called to him. None with what he needed. That might be a stupid assumption, given the fact he had no idea what he needed, or even if it was here. He'd purposely forgotten a lot more than was contained within the palace. Perhaps this was one of those things. Opening a door at random could be the best thing to do. He held off from that for now. Kept walking along that passage. His sometimes guides were notable for their absence. He wasn't getting any help from Raven or Angelique. That was a certainty.

Instead of thinking he should be enjoying the break from that relentless cascade of visual and audio input. Freedom from the influence of others. The ability to exercise his own free will. Hoping it wasn't a deeply buried fetish in his psyche that was happily gorging itself on live porn. He chuckled to himself and kept walking. Jake didn't actually have to choose a door. Simply take a very long walk to clear his head. Remembering not to remember. Now he was here he could see that much of what he'd seen was stored inside him, in stunning uncensored detail. Even things he hadn't been aware of. Such as Fetu and Pip unloading the trike. Her look as she'd gazed toward the house and the workshop. This one.

Jake opened the door, which was exactly the same as all the other doors. Maybe he should reorganize his system with the memory palace. Not copy Scarlet's version so much as use it for inspiration. As usual, opening the door put him inside it, without having to step through. Why hadn't he noticed that before? Placing his hand on the handle, turning it. That was all. The step he was about to take never completed. It was a lot nicer than most of the ones he'd been through. A warm scented garden. Well manicured lawns and exotic flower fragrances on the cooling breeze. No sign of anyone. It came to him. This was from a very long time ago. When he'd been trying to find a way out of that personal hell which led to him dying only to live another slightly different life. A Buddhist monastery in the foothills of the Himalaya's. The first place he'd dared speak of his dilemma to anyone. This was well before he'd met Daisy. Many lifetimes previous to the one in which he'd finally found the mysterious girl he'd often grown up with but never spoken to, except in greeting.

Meditation? Was that the key? He'd received no answers here. They'd asked more questions of him about what his thoughts and feelings were. He'd suspected they considered him either insane or simple minded. He'd found a kind of peace though. No stress or worry. His only company the peaceful monks. Spinning their prayer wheels. Going about their day mostly in silence. Not many chairs unfortunately. There had been a distinct absence of chairs. So he'd sat under a shady tree for hours on end. Its roots having formed a comfortable seat at around the right height. He'd head there. The tinkling of running water from a small brook accompanied him. past a couple of gazebo's one to either side. Around some heavily flowered bushes. There it was. His seat inviting him. He accepted the invitation, hoping that something would happen. Accepting it was a slim chance it would. Grateful for the break from overloaded senses.

When he came here he'd been through a string of suicides. Been insane for too many lifetimes to count. The weight of all the lives he'd experienced too much for him to take. That was why he was here. This place was about desperation. With a bit of restoration thrown in. They were all celibate as well. That must have had some bearing on his choice, he liked to think. The first month of his visit he'd been frantically wrestling with his problems. Eventually he'd stopped. Simply sat down and emptied his mind of all worries. Rather than go through all that again he got straight to the tranquility. There were no answers here. Only more questions. Slipping back into that mode was very easy. Jake leaned back against the trunk of the tree. Closing his eyes and letting out a long breath. His mind was free of all thought apart from acceptance. Freed from worry. Freed from hunger and thirst. He stayed there for many subjective hours. The sun, which had been only halfway above the horizon, had passed its zenith. It was now reaching down to the opposite horizon. He waited for night fall. When the insects would be making their noises.

This was good. He had to get back though. The longer he waited the harder it would be to cope with the return of all that input. The thought was father to the deed inside the memory palace. Jake opened his eyes to the interior of the ship. Lay there watching Chiro's visual manifestation glittering insubstantially in the air. There were patterns in the lights. They were still having sex? Oh right silly him.

"Hermes, how long have I been lying here?" He asked out of curiosity.
"Not much more than a minute. Are you alright?"
Genuine concern in that. Of course Jake's death would also kill his organic computer. It was still nice.
"No. Not as all wrong as I was. Chiro? Have you made any progress?"
The little lights danced.
"Your impatience is noted. However I have only been processing the medical data for 69 of your seconds."
He giggled. How many times had he heard that, or similar? It was in most of the scifi he'd ever watched. Particularly the early stuff. It was a cliche. His merriment ceased. Coincidental or not there was a very energetic 69 taking place right now between Ydrie and Scarlet
"Can you give me an estimate of how long this will take, based on what you have already?" He hurriedly asked.
It could have been just him projecting, but Jake thought those lights were doing a little stamping of their feet.
"Impossible to calculate. There are too many unknowns. One would be too many. There are far more than one. I do not yet understand the mechanism of your link. I do not understand how the link was formed. I will have to construct models of you based on all the information. Then I must test these models. Once the models are tested I will then have to test each individual experiment I carry out on those models. Based on the results I will then have to modify my actions. Biology is complex. Each biological unit is unique. What will work on one, may not work on another."
That was a very long winded way of saying no.
"All I want to know is, are we talking hours or days."
The glitter became agitated again.
"Days at least. I will require your presence here to achieve even that. Removing yourself from the land of Fafindi and its surrounds would weaken the effect. As far as I can calculate."
"That's not an option. We'll be heading off to chat with Ugo, Patriarch of clan Shucha shortly. He's the only reason we're here. This was only supposed to be a short diversion to get our translators modified. We've already been here far longer than planned. I fully expect we'll set off tomorrow morning."
This time those little lights were definitely having a tantrum.
"Your departure must be delayed as long as possible. Not having access to you will lengthen the process considerably. It may not even be possible."
"Aw crap. Maybe they won't even notice I'm gone, long enough to leave without me. I could wait for them at Nour's. No one has commented on my absence yet. It could work. I'm starving though. What time is it?"
Chiro was sulking. Jake was sure of it. It might not have free will, but it had a temper.
"I have calculated the time, according to your system, as 4:36 PM. For future reference you arrived at 11:38 AM. You entered the ship at 12:52 PM. You have been on board for 3 hours 44 minutes and counting. Do you require further assistance?"
Although the question was in a neutral tone, Jake sensed an edge. It didn't stop him from toying with the annoyed ship.
"That explains it then. I missed lunch. Have you got any food around here? I assume the Ustraski eat."
"I am an unmanned interstellar craft. No food or food replication facilities were deemed necessary for my voyage here."
"Bugger." He patted his pockets. Locating two nutrition bars and that small gold thing he'd picked up from the prison armory so long ago and never got round to identifying. "Thanks to Scarlet and Fetu I am eating savory peanut butter and peppermint for my long overdue lunch. You'll get no sympathy from me Chiro. I can see Taini and my two friends eating outside. It looks good. I bet it tastes even better. I'm sorry, but once I get hungry again I'm off. If not sooner. There is nothing to do in here. Nothing to distract my mind, from the erotic finger sucking that is taking place around the dinner table. So fuck you."